1/22/2022 c13 35Tala Is Shining
Well. Must say the story itself isnt bad. Nice ideas

Only it was way to hard to read. Plz use " or ' with talking sentence.
Use the , or . More
All of that might make it less confusing. I am no expert but reading a sentence like. I know barb said.
Is better
"I know". Barb said to ...

~Tala