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1/18 c4 lazyguy90
It's time for Shiro Emiya to timecop the hell out of this dark future and save his loved ones!

Whilst also enjoying wacky misadventures with heroic spirits.
1/16 c4 Indura
Pretty solid
1/15 c4 5Sgt. M00re
Great story so far. Will Shirou summon chloe, ilya, and assassin emiya? Can't wait for the interaction between him and ishtar.
1/12 c4 Tests Trials and Tribulations
HWAHWAHWAHWAHWAHWAHWAH. Having failed the gacha multiple times, I thought to myself: "What if we pull Saber Gilles" but decided not to say anything not to jinx it. He still bloody came, haehuaheauheauheauhea, I am dying, haha.
1/12 c4 Guest
Thanks for the chapter, and keep up the great work!
1/12 c4 Guest
Nice start so far. Looking forward to seeing where you take this.

One thing though - you never really described Lancer beyond her being female. Is this Lolidusa or the Fate GO Movie Lancer?
1/9 c4 Andaeus
Ooph, I really felt Shirou's world disappear fr beneath his feet with those last few lines.

I'm really enjoying this, so far it's already got a very different feel from all the other Shirou in Grand Order fics.

Your writing is also very grounded and to-the-point, especially your fight scenes. For the most part it's very refreshing, but at times a little jarring. Heroic Spirits lose a little of their impact when they go out so quickly, even if it makes sense.

For example, Lancer's quick victory over Archer was logical in the clash between their abilities but I find it unlikely Archer would so readily place himself in a situation where Lancer's advantages could be leveraged so immediately. And the image of Byakuya and Kanshou so easily disemboweling the Wicker Man was a little hard to accept.

The fight with Saber and her final exchange with Shirou on the other hand was fantastically short and sweet.

I do hope you slow the pacing down as you start to diverge and the story becomes more unique. Contracting Lancer!Medusa instead of Cu was a fun change, but you didn't give much context for why she was so willing to accept Shirou as a master or why she would go out of her way to save Olga.

All in all though this has been a great read. I am looking forward to more!
1/9 c4 2GGFBank
Olgamarie ga shinda!
wait, she didn't? that is one big happy surprise!
1/6 c4 Guest
Oh no, don’t make Rin die so fast, what’s happening? She hasn’t finished her conversation with him before the mission right? We never get to know what she want tell him now.
1/6 c4 Star
This is what happens when u r surrounded by nerds...
Perverts...gamers and animators...
U create the cluster fuck known as FGO
1/6 c4 4theguyinblue
This chapter is a bit ehhh... The fight scenes are weak and shirou feels off, his interaction with EMIYA and salter is very underwhelming to be blunt but I'm definitely going to wait and see how this one go
1/5 c4 123ABIR123
This fanfic is good pls update more.
1/5 c1 PSYCongroo
Shirou parece un bastardo malagradecido, el sabe la razón por la que Archer acabo así, no entiendo por qué parece tan antagónico, si no fuera por la presencia de Archer en la Quinta guerra del Santo Grial shirou hubiera acabo haciendo lo mismo que Archer, incluyendo el contrato de Alaya.
En Fate, Archer le ayudo dándoles consejos sobre Tracing, diciéndole que si no tenía un arma que pudiera vencer a su enemigo que imaginará uno (no recuerdo bien las palabras exactas) con eso, Shirou proyecto Caliburn
En UBW, Shirou no hubiera tenido oportunidad contra Archer si el hubiera hecho todo lo posible desde el principio, nunca lo atacó en puntos vitales, incluso le dió tiempo para recuperarse, y al final se dejo ganar cuando se dió cuenta que este Shirou comprendió lo que le esperaba si continuaba en su camino de héroe de la justicia, shirou igual seguiría caminando por este camino, pero con la ayuda de Rin no haría el contrato con Alaya y no se convertiría en Archer
En Heveans Feels, se sacrificó para salvarle la vida a Iliasvel y le dió su brazo a Shirou para que pudiera protejer a sus seres queridos cuando se dió cuenta que este shirou no se convertiría en el.

Tu Shirou dice tener 27 años, pero se comporta como si tuviera 17, no parece haber madurado ni un poco, por qué parece tan antagónico con Archer? (Aunque no se si es Archer Alter el que se encuentra en el capitulo 4) el ya debería haber estado en algún campo de batalla, así que debe haber entendido mejor por qué acabo así.
Por otra parte, los ataques que Saber Alter estaba lanzando no eran Excaliburn Morgan verdad? El mismo ataque que destruyó el Rho Aias de Archer en Heavens Feels de una vez, el mato 9 veces a Hercules o el que solo fue vencido por Belerofonte de Medusa y con ayuda de Shirou?

Lo siento si esto parece un ataque contra tu historia, sigue con el buen trabajo.
1/5 c4 Masterx01
Hmmm...

For the most part the chapter was alright. It was well writen and the dialogued well done.

However, there some parts i didnt like nor agree with.

In neither route of FSN or FZ Artoria has blow up the Greater Grail. It always has been the Lesser one.

In one of the extra material it is stated that while Shirou/EMIYA can Project shields and armors if they push themselves to the limit, the cost of such things will be three times higher than if it were a sword and the Projection will only last a few moments. And it looks to me that Rho Aias lasted a bit too much.

Regarding to EMIYA... i would believe that after their fight in the UBW route, Shirou wouldnt have so many trouble with him even if they do not like each other that much. Shirou feelings in this chapter were a bit too antagonistic and rather misplaced considering that... what was EMIYA suposed to do in that situation? Saber not only destroyed him but also soloed the rest of the sevants in the war bar Caster and after being re-summoned he was little better than a puppet of the Grail.

On the other hand i can understand how he was killed so easily...

Regarding to Artoria... i didnt like how it developed and how it ended. It was completely anticlimatic and bit of let down. She was the one that soloed almost all the war and had the Grail giving her infinite mana. But then, the fight barely lasted and she went down like some random mid-boss.

I expected more from that encounter and the EMIYA one if im sincere. Both encounter were disappointed and i sincerely hope the rest of the fic isnt going to be the same.

Outside that, Shirou turned Hrunting into a Broken Phantasm and the thing didnt explode once it hit Saber? Whats up with that?

Also, EMIYA can shot that thing at mach 10. Shirou isnt EMIYA, he weaked.

I would be also nice if you also included character descriptions in the chapter. I think Shirou would be a bit more surpriced by seeing Saber Alter appareance than that.
1/5 c4 2Wendel Santana
Continue, pls!
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