for Invisible Man1/21/2022 c2 Chryseum
You introduce him as someone who is always ignored, yet in the second chapter you have both Devil Kings in kuoh onto him as well as the fallen. There was no build up and Raynare seems way too competent to be able to feel a devil summon without koneko feeling her and then to be so suspicious straight away as well? It just feels too coincidental to be true.
You introduce him as someone who is always ignored, yet in the second chapter you have both Devil Kings in kuoh onto him as well as the fallen. There was no build up and Raynare seems way too competent to be able to feel a devil summon without koneko feeling her and then to be so suspicious straight away as well? It just feels too coincidental to be true.
10/26/2021 c5 
2Xerzo LotCN
It is a massive shame this is a solo pairing cause that causes all the canon harem to be forced into ntr pairings which is a disgraceful and disgusting shame of a sour note for a fic
2Xerzo LotCNIt is a massive shame this is a solo pairing cause that causes all the canon harem to be forced into ntr pairings which is a disgraceful and disgusting shame of a sour note for a fic
9/27/2021 c1 Jordanfrazier90
really loved the idea of this story and how well it was written but if you don't want to continue it then you should definitely start one you do want to write
really loved the idea of this story and how well it was written but if you don't want to continue it then you should definitely start one you do want to write
9/26/2021 c5 KiritoAlpha
sad to see a good story fallout but at least you had fun with this. good luck in your future endeavors
sad to see a good story fallout but at least you had fun with this. good luck in your future endeavors
9/26/2021 c5 4Ace - Old Account
"Better to have published and hiatus-ed than to have never published at all." - Ghandi Probably
4Ace - Old Account"Better to have published and hiatus-ed than to have never published at all." - Ghandi Probably
8/5/2021 c4 AWeirdReader
oh wow this is interesting to read, especially when everyone brainstorms on how they never noticed him before. I hope you update this soon, its pretty good!
does anyone know any other Invisible! Issei fics like this, or any good IsseixKoneko fics?
oh wow this is interesting to read, especially when everyone brainstorms on how they never noticed him before. I hope you update this soon, its pretty good!
does anyone know any other Invisible! Issei fics like this, or any good IsseixKoneko fics?
6/2/2021 c4 sepawthor
Is this updated just recently? I was searching for a koneko x Issei fic and found this. Personally, I loved how Issei have a different personality in this one. I find his pervy personality quite pathetic but don't get me wrong, I was laughing at it. I was like, atleast he's not that dense. Welp, I hope for an update, this certainly is intriguing and decent
Is this updated just recently? I was searching for a koneko x Issei fic and found this. Personally, I loved how Issei have a different personality in this one. I find his pervy personality quite pathetic but don't get me wrong, I was laughing at it. I was like, atleast he's not that dense. Welp, I hope for an update, this certainly is intriguing and decent
5/18/2021 c4 Guest
Take your time with the updates to work through making the next chapters "right". Better to have a good chapter, then a bad one that you wrote fast. Either way, can't wait until the next one
Take your time with the updates to work through making the next chapters "right". Better to have a good chapter, then a bad one that you wrote fast. Either way, can't wait until the next one
5/12/2021 c4 5Xerozzuro
Great work on the chapter, I'm really interested to see where you're going with this. I like that you're still following canon for the most part, but the deviations you've put in your chapters are enjoyable, so they grab my attention and urge me to keep on reading.
I've said it before, but I really enjoy reading about your version of Issei, his personality still hits close to home, so it's really interesting to read his internal monologues and whatnot.
Now, as for your concerns - writing romance is tricky, yes. I've tried some stuff out myself and my findings are that some tries end up being better than others.
My advice would be to try and get Issei and Koneko close by warming up Koneko to Issei and making them friends before anything else. The way I see it, Koneko currently has the wrong impression of the Issei in your story, so trying to change that would be the most logical first step. Think up of some way to make them spend time with each other, even if one of them (or both) is unwilling to at first. It's a bit cliché and kinda trope-y, but it works most of the time.
The way I think would work is to make them train together, since, all things considered, Rias still has a forced marriage to go through. Perhaps you can write it so Koneko personally trains Issei and comes to the conclusion that she might be mistaken about him and that her suspicions of him being a pervert were wrong.
TL;DR - I think it's best to go down the 'Friends-to-Lovers route', so before you try to pair them up, you should clear up the misunderstanding between them and make them close enough to be friends. Regardless of how you go around to do it though, don't rush it. Let their relationship develop naturally.
Also, don't be afraid of "screwing up". I get that it's a legit worry, but try not to think too hard on it. Just have fun and try your best. That's all.
As for your issue regarding the fights - that's kind of a tough one, at least for me. What I usually do is read/watch through something I enjoy, take notes of the fights and then try to describe them and write them down in my own stories. Results vary greatly and some turn out better than others (mainly because I'm not really that good at writing, lol), but perhaps this will work out for you as well.
All in all, I really enjoy what you've written so far and I'm really eager to see more, so I hope to see more of you soon!
'Stay awesome!'
- Xeroz/Xerozzuro
5XerozzuroGreat work on the chapter, I'm really interested to see where you're going with this. I like that you're still following canon for the most part, but the deviations you've put in your chapters are enjoyable, so they grab my attention and urge me to keep on reading.
I've said it before, but I really enjoy reading about your version of Issei, his personality still hits close to home, so it's really interesting to read his internal monologues and whatnot.
Now, as for your concerns - writing romance is tricky, yes. I've tried some stuff out myself and my findings are that some tries end up being better than others.
My advice would be to try and get Issei and Koneko close by warming up Koneko to Issei and making them friends before anything else. The way I see it, Koneko currently has the wrong impression of the Issei in your story, so trying to change that would be the most logical first step. Think up of some way to make them spend time with each other, even if one of them (or both) is unwilling to at first. It's a bit cliché and kinda trope-y, but it works most of the time.
The way I think would work is to make them train together, since, all things considered, Rias still has a forced marriage to go through. Perhaps you can write it so Koneko personally trains Issei and comes to the conclusion that she might be mistaken about him and that her suspicions of him being a pervert were wrong.
TL;DR - I think it's best to go down the 'Friends-to-Lovers route', so before you try to pair them up, you should clear up the misunderstanding between them and make them close enough to be friends. Regardless of how you go around to do it though, don't rush it. Let their relationship develop naturally.
Also, don't be afraid of "screwing up". I get that it's a legit worry, but try not to think too hard on it. Just have fun and try your best. That's all.
As for your issue regarding the fights - that's kind of a tough one, at least for me. What I usually do is read/watch through something I enjoy, take notes of the fights and then try to describe them and write them down in my own stories. Results vary greatly and some turn out better than others (mainly because I'm not really that good at writing, lol), but perhaps this will work out for you as well.
All in all, I really enjoy what you've written so far and I'm really eager to see more, so I hope to see more of you soon!
'Stay awesome!'
- Xeroz/Xerozzuro
5/12/2021 c4 9Tri-Edge
I liked this chapter, there was quite a bit going on and the changes you made to the canon scenes were interesting enough to keep my attention on them. I'm excited to see how this plays out in the next chapter!
That said, romance can indeed be a pain to write; write them as friends first, is my suggestion. It sounds simple, but simple does not mean easy—if you give their relationship a solid foundation, their transition into full blown romantic escapades will be much more natural. Or in other simpler words, don't rush it.
As for the last bit I'll say: it's fine to base Issei on yourself—we all do that to a degree—but don't stunt his growth as a character because of it. In that case, if you were to make a static character serving only as a self-insert with no growth beyond that and beyond you, you should've marked this character as an OC and not Issei.
9Tri-EdgeI liked this chapter, there was quite a bit going on and the changes you made to the canon scenes were interesting enough to keep my attention on them. I'm excited to see how this plays out in the next chapter!
That said, romance can indeed be a pain to write; write them as friends first, is my suggestion. It sounds simple, but simple does not mean easy—if you give their relationship a solid foundation, their transition into full blown romantic escapades will be much more natural. Or in other simpler words, don't rush it.
As for the last bit I'll say: it's fine to base Issei on yourself—we all do that to a degree—but don't stunt his growth as a character because of it. In that case, if you were to make a static character serving only as a self-insert with no growth beyond that and beyond you, you should've marked this character as an OC and not Issei.
5/12/2021 c3 Tri-Edge
Issei's scenes felt a bit too short this chapter and that bit with the devil signature exposition seemed a bit too contrived; you would've had the same effect on the reader by just saying it was a plain old signature.
Issei's scenes felt a bit too short this chapter and that bit with the devil signature exposition seemed a bit too contrived; you would've had the same effect on the reader by just saying it was a plain old signature.
5/12/2021 c4 2Ryuujin96
Great work on this chapter. I hope the misunderstanding between Issei and Koneko is clear up soon and she realizes he isn't a pervert.
I'm happy that it seems like Issei's going to Rias's peerage, I was worries that you weren't going to have Issei be apart of her peerage, by having Issei turn down her offer to join. I'm hoping that Issei becomes a Rook, despite that he'll most likely become a Pawn.
It was interesting that Momo asked Issei out on a date instead of Raynare , only for him to rejected her offer. While Issei getting getting killed came out of nowhere, I liked that you did it this way because I don't think I've seen Issei's death at the begin done this way before.
My suggestions in building Issei and Koneko's relationship, since Issei was Koneko's contract you could have Rias ask Koneko to be Issei's primary trainer, that way you get them to interact with each other which is a first step.
At first there would be conflict between Issei and Koneko, since she does not have a good opinion of Issei, because she thinks him to be a pervert. But by having them interact with each other, you can have them slowly get closer to one another. Also since Koneko would be seeing what his true character is like during their training, she could come to slowly realize Issei isn't a pervert.
Whenever you decide to have Issei and Koneko fight side by side in battle could lead to shift in their relationship, turning it into a close friendship and Issei gaining Koneko's trust. This could also be the point where Issei realizes he cares about Koneko.
If it's a decent amount time before Issei find out that Koneko's Nekoshou, and that Koneko fear her powers, once he finds out
he finds out and vows to help and be there for her you could have Koneko grow to have feeling for him.
As for when Issei develops feels for Koneko, if you take my having them train together suggestion he could develop feeling for her even during that time, but hides and denys his feelings.
Once Issei and Koneko have developed feeling for each other you could have an incident like the aftermath of a battle lead them to confess to each other, or Koneko confess to Issei and Issei telling her that while he has feelings for her he needs more time.
I'm not sure if that was helpful or not or the path you want to take with your story. However I just wanted to at least try and help out, despite the fact I'm not being good at building relationships in stories either. In any event, great work on this chapter and I'm looking forward to reading chapter 5.
2Ryuujin96Great work on this chapter. I hope the misunderstanding between Issei and Koneko is clear up soon and she realizes he isn't a pervert.
I'm happy that it seems like Issei's going to Rias's peerage, I was worries that you weren't going to have Issei be apart of her peerage, by having Issei turn down her offer to join. I'm hoping that Issei becomes a Rook, despite that he'll most likely become a Pawn.
It was interesting that Momo asked Issei out on a date instead of Raynare , only for him to rejected her offer. While Issei getting getting killed came out of nowhere, I liked that you did it this way because I don't think I've seen Issei's death at the begin done this way before.
My suggestions in building Issei and Koneko's relationship, since Issei was Koneko's contract you could have Rias ask Koneko to be Issei's primary trainer, that way you get them to interact with each other which is a first step.
At first there would be conflict between Issei and Koneko, since she does not have a good opinion of Issei, because she thinks him to be a pervert. But by having them interact with each other, you can have them slowly get closer to one another. Also since Koneko would be seeing what his true character is like during their training, she could come to slowly realize Issei isn't a pervert.
Whenever you decide to have Issei and Koneko fight side by side in battle could lead to shift in their relationship, turning it into a close friendship and Issei gaining Koneko's trust. This could also be the point where Issei realizes he cares about Koneko.
If it's a decent amount time before Issei find out that Koneko's Nekoshou, and that Koneko fear her powers, once he finds out
he finds out and vows to help and be there for her you could have Koneko grow to have feeling for him.
As for when Issei develops feels for Koneko, if you take my having them train together suggestion he could develop feeling for her even during that time, but hides and denys his feelings.
Once Issei and Koneko have developed feeling for each other you could have an incident like the aftermath of a battle lead them to confess to each other, or Koneko confess to Issei and Issei telling her that while he has feelings for her he needs more time.
I'm not sure if that was helpful or not or the path you want to take with your story. However I just wanted to at least try and help out, despite the fact I'm not being good at building relationships in stories either. In any event, great work on this chapter and I'm looking forward to reading chapter 5.