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2/27 c37 luffy1996
I'm a little disappointed the 4 knights did not have their namesakes noble phantasms... it would have been a good opportunity to give Shirou some new Noble Phantasms
2/27 c35 luffy1996
This Story is pretty Good and i have no major issues with it, but to add to my point from chapter 36:

By enemy action i mean like some kind of magic or ability to compel someone to ignore certain solutions and suspicious activity. This can be seen when Shirou doesn't even think to contact the protectors until Yoruiichi reminded him after raiding the base (it has already been established that sufficient mastery of touki grants resistance to most abilities).

Even during the call, they find it suspicious yet they chose not to trust Rias with those suspicions even though Shirou and Rias promised not to keep secrets like that in a previous chapter. Yes Shirou tells Rias about the knights and their trap... but the knights themselves are merely a distraction for Kokabiel.

And by negligent, i mean that Shirou was negligent to his duties by not doing his due diligence... Think about it, if Shirou insisted informing Sirzech's to keep an eye on Fuyuki like Rias should have... then this arc may not(for the most part) have happened. But because he and Rias did not, Everyone is now in even more danger than canon because now Rias will think Sirzechs knows when it's actually Kokabiel who does.

It was already established that Rias would willingly inform her brother if it was to protect Shirou or if Shirou insisted on it. Yes, it was also established that Shirou wouldn't abuse that but i think this is different.
2/27 c36 luffy1996
The fact that the Holy Swords could enter Fuyuki would be enough for anyone to suspect foul play. The fact Yoruiichi and Shirou of all people don't suspect that is very convenient to this plot, too convenient. This is without the knowledge that the Excalibur Shards are heavily guarded by a powerful faction (which everyone knows).

In order for anything like this to happen they would need to get past Kiritsugu who was tasked by Sirzech's to stop criminals from making it to Kuoh who have precisely these characteristics... The very fact they are here means Valper needed to be sponsored by someone with more resources than Lucifer's personal magician... Shirou knows this, Yoruiichi knows this, heck even Rias knows this.

Therefore the fact no one is taking this seriously makes no sense. It would be different if Shirou didn't know what his father does, but he does. So the fact Shirou didn't at the very least insist on contacting someone or even just including Sona is negligence at best or enemy action at worst.
2/25 c29 luffy1996
If you go the Goetia route, i hope he doesn't take over shirou.. rather he would split off from Shirou and be a Shirou Alter if you will. A being that has Shirou's form and maybe even his magecraft and skills.
2/25 c28 luffy1996
To be fair, i'm pretty sure Vritra is way more dangerous in fate than in DXD
2/25 c27 luffy1996
Is Shirou really the MC? Because you are piggybacking canon and made all of the changes Shirou made pointless... Shirou hasn't even been the POV for 10 chapters, rather it was issei. Having 2 MC doesn't work, Issei shouldn't be in this story... he isn't relevant and adds nothing to the story other than incentive to follow canon.
2/25 c26 luffy1996
This chapter really highlights the problem with having 2 main characters trying to save the limelight.
2/24 c19 luffy1996
Shirou not being affected probably has something to do with Avalon and his reality marble
2/24 c18 luffy1996
I figured out what was annoying me so much about Shirou's no lethal self defense policy... (please note this is my only real complaint about this story)

Shirou cares more about strangers than he does himself, but he also cares more for the lives of friends and family more than he does the lives of strangers or the sanctity of his ideals. This can be seen clearly in Heaven's Feel and Fate Kaleid. In fate Kaleid, Shirou abandons his ideals to save Miyu even though sacrificing her would save the world. In Heaven's feel, shirou abandons his ideals for Sakura in an attempt to save her.

Shirou would not force his friends and family to fight lethal force nonlethally. And he especially wouldn't force them when they were at risk of losing a battle. Shirou himself might do so as he doesn't value himself but he wouldn't do that to Leysritt or even Rin. When Shirou left to carry out his ideal he realized fairly quickly that some people can't be saved, this is a part of Archer's backstory... and it was the realization Kiritsugu made as well, he just took it to an extreme whereas Archer was forced by Alaya to do something similar.
2/24 c76 Tobi
One curiousity I have is if you will have Shirou visit any museums? The recent El-Melloi book showed Shirou was able to projects a divine chisel from Egypt he saw at the British Museum. Wondering is something similar will happen here.
2/23 c12 luffy1996
Honestly it feels like you are fighting for dear life trying to force the story away from lemons
2/23 c1 Killerpickle
The grammar is terrible
2/22 c74 Falvern
Shirou still getting rolled I see lol. Not like there was any hope of him defeating her. Different universe, same outcome I suppose. Hopefully he doesnt stay this weak forever but who knows.
2/20 c76 blarg7865
It's good to see how dominate Rias' peerage is shown here. It's shown how much they have grown since the Riser match, along with how much stronger they can still get.
2/20 c23 Falvern
Meh. Well it was nice for Shirou to actually have a Noble Phantasm to use that isn't a knock off. One that he can actually use unlike Avalon. Should have figured that was coming sooner or later. Guess there's really no escaping being a Faker in every capacity. Back to mediocrity it is I suppose.
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