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for Lucky Two-Fourteen

6/23 c1 Guest
Really enjoyed your story. Beautifully written. Thank you.
6/7 c1 Shazza19
Really really enjoyed this story l just happened to come across it. You wrote the boys so well and hurt both of them just tight. Thank you for writing this I was hooked from the first chapter.
5/5 c1 WinterInAutumn
I couldn’t put it down and read it in one day! ... If you have some great stories like this one, you can publish it on Novel Star, just submit your story to hardy novelstar. top or joye novelstar. top
4/28 c1 cyrilalbar06
The story is powerful; I like how it was presented. Good job writer! If you have some great stories like this one, you can publish it on Novel Star, just submit your story to hardy novelstar. top or joye novelstar. top
4/27 c1 Guest
I started reading this at night in bed in the dark, got creeped out and had to save it for the morning. This was so well written and it stayed true to the characters. I really really liked it!
4/26 c1 unknown2351830163
Awesome story. I love it. You can join in NovelStar writing contest with a theme "WEREWOLVES" Prices are amazing!

httpsauthor. starlight. ink/essay/index. html
(PC)
httpapp. novelstar. top/index/index/special/id/87
or email any of the following editors;
hardy novelstar. top
joye novelstar. top
lena novelstar. top
app. novelstar. top
4/26 c1 Guest
I LOVED IT! Please write more SPN fics! :D
4/25 c1 Amaure
These are the type of stories I love to read. I hope I can see your work in NovelStar. There are also a lot of talented writers in that platform. You may check their group on Facebook.
4/25 c1 19frankannestein
Hello, CrystalAlchemist!

I started reading this, not sure what to expect, but I quickly became entangled in the story. It’s very well plotted! I feel like this could have been a very good episode of the show. It has all the elements I look forward to in an episode – it’s mysterious, there’s action, there’s a bit of humor, there are the brothers teasing each other, fighting for each other, struggling against some inner demons concerning Sam’s time at Stanford, there are secondary characters that are big in their own rights. Liam is so well-written, and I can say that even though it’s really hard to like him, because I know someone like that too, and the way the conversation gets re-centered with every exchange is spot-on and exhausting, lol. Matt is refreshingly friendly and well-balanced, as is Hazel. Early on, I’m frightened for Kate, since she seemed the most susceptible to whatever was going on.

I would like to suggest, though, that putting the whole story as one big chunk was hard for me personally. When I read things online, it’s because I know that at any minute, I’ll have to put my phone away to do something in real life. If I could make a small suggestion, and it’s totally fine if you would rather ignore it, break the story into chapters the way you have for your other stories, say, one present-time scene plus one flashback scene. I feel like the story would be more manageable that way, and the pattern would help alleviate some of the disorientation between scenes – where sometimes I forgot this was being told in two timelines. :)

This has nothing to do with anything, but I really, REALLY liked this line: [It wasn’t even haunted, as far as they knew, but it was like all two-hundred-and-thirteen people had left handprints all over the walls of the houses.]

This one, too: [“Sam!” he yelled, as though Sam would miraculously appear if he called loud enough.]

And this one! I am such a huge fan of metaphor! [Sam just kept looking at him with relief, like he’d been the one slowly unraveling thread by thread these past few hours.]

Know what else I like? The fact that this is largely in Dean’s POV. It was the right choice for the story, imo. The feelings and motivations of the brothers, and to some extent the others, are very clearly stated and shown throughout, which is part of why I enjoyed reading the story so much. But to have that extra insight into Dean’s motivations – which are all very in-character, well done! – made me feel really invested in their survival. Like this: [Dean’s immediate instinct was to find the source of Sam’s terror and get rid of it, but then Dean realized that it was he, himself, that had scared Sam to badly.] So good. The ending is good, too. Sweet to see the nickname thrown in there again, and have it be a word of love, not one of teasing.

~ Anne
4/25 c1 Guest
I just wanted to let you know that this was a REALLY good story. I was reading it late last night and it was giving me the creeps with the way the monster was described. Very well done, love it from being to end!

Zoe

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