
4/26 c29 Unit 971
All makes sense to me, the way that you have things designed is intentional and why certain decisions were made are easy to see after it's laid out like that! Others should have stopped to think about it more before offering criticism I may look to join the discord, its been a while since I was last on but after seeing it mentioned so often I probably should show support more than just the occasional review
All makes sense to me, the way that you have things designed is intentional and why certain decisions were made are easy to see after it's laid out like that! Others should have stopped to think about it more before offering criticism I may look to join the discord, its been a while since I was last on but after seeing it mentioned so often I probably should show support more than just the occasional review
4/26 c28 Unit 971
Now this was where I had read up to previously, now having re-read through the whole story over the course of a few weeks. I absolutely loved this chapter and everything about the Battle of Naboo! I have no idea what happens from here, but for everything you have written and all the new stories you have done since then, thank you so much for providing such fantastic stories! I wish you all the best, have a great weekend!
Now this was where I had read up to previously, now having re-read through the whole story over the course of a few weeks. I absolutely loved this chapter and everything about the Battle of Naboo! I have no idea what happens from here, but for everything you have written and all the new stories you have done since then, thank you so much for providing such fantastic stories! I wish you all the best, have a great weekend!
4/25 c8 Xeranes
So random to have them kill those feline things. Cam can just knockout anything without mental training against it by looking at it funny. Easier too. So why?
So random to have them kill those feline things. Cam can just knockout anything without mental training against it by looking at it funny. Easier too. So why?
4/9 c13 Soraslove
I'm not sure why the MC feels the need to rush ahead into a relationship while he's 13 years old? I mean he hasn't even gotten to a point where he has a good combat style yet, nor mastered all the fighting styles available for him to do so.
And now he has faced a large set back by having psychological issues due to trauma... it seems rushed and more importantly not a good idea for someone like him who could potentially end up being a teenaged father, lol.
I'm not sure why the MC feels the need to rush ahead into a relationship while he's 13 years old? I mean he hasn't even gotten to a point where he has a good combat style yet, nor mastered all the fighting styles available for him to do so.
And now he has faced a large set back by having psychological issues due to trauma... it seems rushed and more importantly not a good idea for someone like him who could potentially end up being a teenaged father, lol.
3/28 c31 Jared Reese
Grat job on this story. Loved it, and book one. Ill admit it sucked me in and probably distracted me a bit much till i finished.
Grat job on this story. Loved it, and book one. Ill admit it sucked me in and probably distracted me a bit much till i finished.
1/11 c31 ldeadlyx
Decent story and follow up of the first.
Biggest peeve with the story is the author has issues with keeping story continuity, more than once using events as they happened cannon even after events in the story should have changed aspects of them without accounting for the story changed aspects.
Second biggest peeve is the feeling of Cam being nerfed in comparison from how he was advertised through the first story. The author was apparently upset enough with all of the reviews stating as such as to address it and other criticisms in chapter 29. It doesn’t make it unreadable by any means, do not expect a ton of uses of the force that feel fun in scale.
On the good side there were many fun story arcs brought up in various SW media with unexpected twists and a decent up and down and alright character development for Cam throughout. There’s certainly some fun Legends lore and an interesting take on aspects of Jedi life. It’s engaging and well written, outside of the previously mentioned continuity issues, enough that I’ve stuck through 2 stories and am headed to start the 3rd.
Overall, worth the read, far from a must read.
Decent story and follow up of the first.
Biggest peeve with the story is the author has issues with keeping story continuity, more than once using events as they happened cannon even after events in the story should have changed aspects of them without accounting for the story changed aspects.
Second biggest peeve is the feeling of Cam being nerfed in comparison from how he was advertised through the first story. The author was apparently upset enough with all of the reviews stating as such as to address it and other criticisms in chapter 29. It doesn’t make it unreadable by any means, do not expect a ton of uses of the force that feel fun in scale.
On the good side there were many fun story arcs brought up in various SW media with unexpected twists and a decent up and down and alright character development for Cam throughout. There’s certainly some fun Legends lore and an interesting take on aspects of Jedi life. It’s engaging and well written, outside of the previously mentioned continuity issues, enough that I’ve stuck through 2 stories and am headed to start the 3rd.
Overall, worth the read, far from a must read.
12/21/2024 c14 fooplaya
Something that could be interesting since HK is gonna be a help vs the Sith would be if Cam thought to include parts from the Taozin in the last chapter into his droid body (like the nodules that can make someone hard to detect with the force) as an additional leg up.
Also, wow, this is SUPER early for the Vong. Wonder how that will play out going forward (though I suppose this could be an advanced discovery group or something).
In other news, reading this has got me back into playing SWTOR :P
Something that could be interesting since HK is gonna be a help vs the Sith would be if Cam thought to include parts from the Taozin in the last chapter into his droid body (like the nodules that can make someone hard to detect with the force) as an additional leg up.
Also, wow, this is SUPER early for the Vong. Wonder how that will play out going forward (though I suppose this could be an advanced discovery group or something).
In other news, reading this has got me back into playing SWTOR :P
12/5/2024 c10 twerp22
i am going to stop reading here. I dont know if it is because I've been reading this as fast as i can, but everything just seems to be dragging on, and it seems like Cam is slowly getting weaker then what he was before. I really liked the first book, and I'm just not liking this one as much
i am going to stop reading here. I dont know if it is because I've been reading this as fast as i can, but everything just seems to be dragging on, and it seems like Cam is slowly getting weaker then what he was before. I really liked the first book, and I'm just not liking this one as much
10/26/2024 c29 KMS
You don't want to call it a nerf, but at this point that's what you've written. The entire doesn't-connect-with-the-force thing was a retcon you inserted in this section of the fic because barely-teen Cam knifing a GKD and pulling apart warships in space combat showed much higher skill ceiling then apparently you intended.
Maul is supposedly 20 years into Sith assassin training so of course he's so good. ...that's an argument, but the problem with it is it means that pretty much every Sith you show in this story is going to be Jedi Council good... in which case the Jedi just need to fold up and go home because they're no use at all. Sid and daddy-darth are so far off the scale given the data point for Maul that they can just wade into the Jedi Temple and slaughter everyone.
I certainly agree that it's somewhat reasonable that Cam's first real fight with a darksider doesn't go well- oh wait, it wasn't, and you nerfed him hard to get him captured in that mess too.
Maybe all of this was your story plan from the beginning (oh, wait, DICE ROLLS, apparently you don't care enough to properly plan) but what came out was the first fic showed super-Cam, and we read through hundreds of thousands of words which set that expectation. Then in this story suddenly he can't fight force-users at all (though somehow he's still good enough to teach lightsaber combat, talk about having it both ways), and pretty much is unable to accomplish anything useful except slapping around a few vong and organizing Naboo resistance which would have happened without him.
At this rate, book three had better be all about Cam the general, because at the direction you've written him that's all he's good for. I truly don't get why you set this up as a Gamer cross because that's not the story you want to write. A Gamer-system-as-poison-pill idea is neat, but slowballing it this much just hurts and wastes everyone's time. Claiming that "it's not a full gamer system" is just another retcon when it's giving him out-of-context powers from the beginning.
And attacking your audience for being increasingly upset when you've spent all this time wrong-footing them doesn't reflect well on the future of this fic.
You don't want to call it a nerf, but at this point that's what you've written. The entire doesn't-connect-with-the-force thing was a retcon you inserted in this section of the fic because barely-teen Cam knifing a GKD and pulling apart warships in space combat showed much higher skill ceiling then apparently you intended.
Maul is supposedly 20 years into Sith assassin training so of course he's so good. ...that's an argument, but the problem with it is it means that pretty much every Sith you show in this story is going to be Jedi Council good... in which case the Jedi just need to fold up and go home because they're no use at all. Sid and daddy-darth are so far off the scale given the data point for Maul that they can just wade into the Jedi Temple and slaughter everyone.
I certainly agree that it's somewhat reasonable that Cam's first real fight with a darksider doesn't go well- oh wait, it wasn't, and you nerfed him hard to get him captured in that mess too.
Maybe all of this was your story plan from the beginning (oh, wait, DICE ROLLS, apparently you don't care enough to properly plan) but what came out was the first fic showed super-Cam, and we read through hundreds of thousands of words which set that expectation. Then in this story suddenly he can't fight force-users at all (though somehow he's still good enough to teach lightsaber combat, talk about having it both ways), and pretty much is unable to accomplish anything useful except slapping around a few vong and organizing Naboo resistance which would have happened without him.
At this rate, book three had better be all about Cam the general, because at the direction you've written him that's all he's good for. I truly don't get why you set this up as a Gamer cross because that's not the story you want to write. A Gamer-system-as-poison-pill idea is neat, but slowballing it this much just hurts and wastes everyone's time. Claiming that "it's not a full gamer system" is just another retcon when it's giving him out-of-context powers from the beginning.
And attacking your audience for being increasingly upset when you've spent all this time wrong-footing them doesn't reflect well on the future of this fic.
10/26/2024 c28
9Archangel Change24
Oh and a flamethrower or a slug thrower (ie a normal gun) would take care of Maul pretty damn easily.

Oh and a flamethrower or a slug thrower (ie a normal gun) would take care of Maul pretty damn easily.
10/26/2024 c28 Archangel Change24
Soooo this is honestly one of the worst fights i have seen as far as sticking to Canon goes. One Sidious uses force lightning as a punishment but likely never used the full power of it on Maul thus force lightning is an option. Two he should be easily capable of handling Maul… it almost seems like you weakened Cam by a massive amount and strengthened Maul just to make this a challenge for him.
Soooo this is honestly one of the worst fights i have seen as far as sticking to Canon goes. One Sidious uses force lightning as a punishment but likely never used the full power of it on Maul thus force lightning is an option. Two he should be easily capable of handling Maul… it almost seems like you weakened Cam by a massive amount and strengthened Maul just to make this a challenge for him.
10/23/2024 c31 hear0fgold35
Sometimes this next novel in the series was difficult to get into. It was full of description and minute details that make it an astonishing effort from the author. It was at times just a bit dense and felt like the plot wasn’t movong forward. But I would have complained if it had gone too fast. There’s no pleasing me. I still like the main character and I will keep reading this series. Onto the next.
Sometimes this next novel in the series was difficult to get into. It was full of description and minute details that make it an astonishing effort from the author. It was at times just a bit dense and felt like the plot wasn’t movong forward. But I would have complained if it had gone too fast. There’s no pleasing me. I still like the main character and I will keep reading this series. Onto the next.