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9/30 c102 1Darknessdawns
This was an absolute masterpiece. I loved it from beginning to end and have to say it's one of the best works I have ever enjoyed. One of the things that made this piece so spectacular was how original it was while staying true to much of the canon storyline. Many events and even quotes from the books were displayed right next to unique plot twists and this Harry's reactions to things.

This was also one of my favorite versions of Harry and Fleur I have ever come across. He was one step away from being a Dark Lord, but really didn't have the motivation to go that direction. He was also unapologetically ruthless against his enemies, intelligent, cunning, and occasionally very sweet and protective. She was everything the books and movies hinted at but so much better. The way the two first clashed then meshed was brilliantly done.

Honestly I'm sad to see that the journey is over. You did an excellent job wrapping everything up, giving nods to all the major conon events, and even a wonderful view into their future. The fact that you wrote this with English not being your primary language shows great skill. From what I could see there were several typos throughout the work, but all were easy to figure out and nothing a good edit wouldn't straighten out. I left several reviews as I read and mentioned the big ones I noticed. Anyway I'm sure by now you know I found this story absolutely brilliant and exceedingly enjoyable. You used plot twists I hadn't seen before or even used a few in new and unique ways. I've read thousands of stories for this fandom over the years so it's always a treat to find something new. You also have great talent as a writer and I can't wait to read more of your works.
9/27 c52 Darknessdawns
Wasn't Harry's Gringotts manager Ragnok? it says Raknok in this chapter.
9/26 c35 Darknessdawns
I found another error during Fleur and Harry's. conversation after the first task. I. the conversation he says that they "have a lot of time until November now to prepare for the second task". I'm sure February was meant but I can't remember if it was announced with the chaos of Harry's Dragon slaying and point distribution.
9/26 c27 Darknessdawns
I absolutely loved this chapter. Harry has grown so much in the last few and it was wonderful seeing him act maturely during the duels. The whole thing with Fleur was rather sad though. I'm really looking forward to when they reconnect and realize their feelings. Hopefully it's soon.
9/26 c19 Darknessdawns
I am honestly surprised by how Harry conducted himself during the under-14 duels and the one against Fleur. I can't quite understand the purpose of the unnecessary rudeness. The brutal nature of his dueling I quite liked and even agreed with since he is rather dark. However the unnecessary rudeness will just cause him problems in the future. I can understand being unfriendly but his actions have most likely gained him enemies. He isn't like that at Hogwarts so it seems rather unusual for him to be like this now. I can understand him wanting to get a rise out of Fleur though. I'm hopeful that things will work out. I just don't see how yet. I thought he had learned all the proper protocol and stuff. Why go against some of it?
9/26 c17 Darknessdawns
I have to comment on the companies that Gringotts invested in for Harry. Since this is taking place in the 90's, and specifically the summer of 93 in this chapter, Apple wasn't yet making smartphones. Hell cellphones were few and far between back then. I believe they were still just another computer company at that point but I would have to actually do some research to be sure. Was eBay even a thing in 93? Anyway, rather than worrying about what companies were doing what or existing at that point it would have just been simpler to say that they had invested in several computer companies.

At any rate, I'm really enjoying this story and look forward to reading more. From what I've noticed it could use an editing to catch the typos I've come across. However other than a few minor ones, and things I just feel the need to nitpick about, there hasn't seemed to be anything major. For a first fiction you've done an excellent job and I'm enjoying the story and your writing style. The way you've written the use of the rituals reminds me of another story I enjoyed, Harry Potter and the International Triwizard Tournament by Saliient91. If you haven't read it yet you really should.
9/26 c12 Darknessdawns
I noticed another error in this chapter. Harry has already met Madam Bones. He ran into her and Susan in the wand shop on his birthday before first year.
9/26 c9 Darknessdawns
Target praxis? You mean 'target practice' right?
9/26 c8 Darknessdawns
Ok I have definitely come across an error. During the dueling championship it was announced as 1982 rather than 1992.
9/26 c2 Darknessdawns
Again I was left curious about things. Why didn't the Department of Education workers remove Harry from the Dursley's? With the amount of long term abuse present it didn't really make sense. Didn't they have the police check his living situation? No one would leave a child to sleep in a cupboard. I think this might need a bit more explanation since it just looks like they left Harry to the abuse. Maybe it's due to a ward or something? Magical interference?

Anyway, just ignore my nitpicking. I'm curious to see where this goes.
9/26 c1 Darknessdawns
Department of Education? I would have never believed that was the name of the department that looked over child welfare if I hadn't done a Google search.
9/24 c29 19DRAGONDAVE45
You, and Harry, seem to have forgotten about the snake in the pet shop.
9/13 c19 12stealacandy
I think you may have meant "brutally subduing", not "submitting".

Also, the spell is "Sonorus", not "soronus".
9/13 c17 stealacandy
It's Herpo the Foul, not the Fool...
9/12 c43 stealacandy
McGonaggal didn't belittle Harry. She may have chastise, castigate or berate him. But no belittling was involved.
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