for Naruto: The Leveling Shinobi2/1/2022 c3 
1StrangestQuark
I like that you didn't immediately change Naruto's personality. You could have and have it be somewhat justified but I always prefer gradual progression to immediate. Other then I don't have much to say about the chapter. It was cool, but there wasn't any real derivation from the original other then the fight's exact details.
q1: I'd prefer sth other then a sword. Maybe some sort of polearm? That's pretty rare in Naruto.
q2: Pein hands down. He has both a more interesting motive and a lot more connection to Naruto then Madara. I probably prefer Obito to Madara tbh.
1StrangestQuarkI like that you didn't immediately change Naruto's personality. You could have and have it be somewhat justified but I always prefer gradual progression to immediate. Other then I don't have much to say about the chapter. It was cool, but there wasn't any real derivation from the original other then the fight's exact details.
q1: I'd prefer sth other then a sword. Maybe some sort of polearm? That's pretty rare in Naruto.
q2: Pein hands down. He has both a more interesting motive and a lot more connection to Naruto then Madara. I probably prefer Obito to Madara tbh.
2/1/2022 c3 1theIrishWriter
I would suggested for the pairing/shipping do what you want, just don't have it appear out of nowhere, or have it Naruto suddenly likes a character that he didn't before. in short don't do what the Last did.
personally choice Sakura and Naruto, they were the most developed relationship in the Canon, until the Last. or a developed NaruHina or NaruIno
Weapons, I not sure what would fit with Naruto, he likely too fast for a Club or a Hammer, maybe his father's Kunai, or short sword, a Japanese fighting spear, or a Bo-Staff.
My Favourite villain is Zabuza, he a villain with layers,
Frankly alot of the Villian are just puppets for someone else (Madara, Pain, Obito), or so misguided that it kind of hard to understand there POV (BZ, Kayuga Orchi) or frankly just idiots (that instructor)
1theIrishWriterI would suggested for the pairing/shipping do what you want, just don't have it appear out of nowhere, or have it Naruto suddenly likes a character that he didn't before. in short don't do what the Last did.
personally choice Sakura and Naruto, they were the most developed relationship in the Canon, until the Last. or a developed NaruHina or NaruIno
Weapons, I not sure what would fit with Naruto, he likely too fast for a Club or a Hammer, maybe his father's Kunai, or short sword, a Japanese fighting spear, or a Bo-Staff.
My Favourite villain is Zabuza, he a villain with layers,
Frankly alot of the Villian are just puppets for someone else (Madara, Pain, Obito), or so misguided that it kind of hard to understand there POV (BZ, Kayuga Orchi) or frankly just idiots (that instructor)
2/1/2022 c3 Damien8d
Still in favor of (fem) Haku while there's still a chance for that.
If not (or in addition to her) then let him read Hinatas stats and make him realize that she has higher stats than what she's supposed to have.
Her lack of confidence and trauma could be a negative trait/effect and while they train together maybe Naruto is able to lift that trait in favor of a positive one where she gains a Stat boost when she's near Naruto.
Same would go for Haku:
Negative trait: unable to kill
Positive trait: gains strength while fighting for loved one/precious person.
You could however go for the CRA - than you could include Karin, Anko, Shizuka, Ino, Tayuya, Kurama (the girl not the fox), Guren,...
Again I hope you include the skills and traits Naruto is supposed to have (before receiving the system).
Naruto was able to do the other 2 of the academy 3 and it's also a badly kept secret that his transformation is more than a genjutsu and the real thing (most likely the power he received from the kyubi)
He was able to do pranks right under the nose of anbu and jonin with his "kill me" - clothes so an ability that includes these skills or a trait which lets him do that effectively (maybe once again something kyubi enabled him to do) would be appreciated.
Him having a skill for hunting and cooking because he was dependent on it due to the villagers overpricing him or refusing to sell to him is also an option.
However that would require you to adjust his stats to be higher while also adjusting the other genin.
A higher Wis, Vit and Str Stat would be the logical conclusion and a "?" for his absurdly high luck (or scrap that stat altogether in favor of a trait (like luck of the fox or something).
BTW Vit could be the Stat responsible for Chakra and Int for effective use.
Then Sakura and Shikamaru could still have absurdly high Int while Naruto, Choji etc have more Chakra.
A weapon for Naruto could be a katana like his mother had. (she was called the red death after all)
Later on he could use the kunai his dad used when he's proficient enough in seals.
I would still go for wind - but in addition to that water.
If you decide to go for Haku as the (or one of) pairing than she could teach him waterjutsu.
Wind could be a huge advantage for the katana.
Still in favor of (fem) Haku while there's still a chance for that.
If not (or in addition to her) then let him read Hinatas stats and make him realize that she has higher stats than what she's supposed to have.
Her lack of confidence and trauma could be a negative trait/effect and while they train together maybe Naruto is able to lift that trait in favor of a positive one where she gains a Stat boost when she's near Naruto.
Same would go for Haku:
Negative trait: unable to kill
Positive trait: gains strength while fighting for loved one/precious person.
You could however go for the CRA - than you could include Karin, Anko, Shizuka, Ino, Tayuya, Kurama (the girl not the fox), Guren,...
Again I hope you include the skills and traits Naruto is supposed to have (before receiving the system).
Naruto was able to do the other 2 of the academy 3 and it's also a badly kept secret that his transformation is more than a genjutsu and the real thing (most likely the power he received from the kyubi)
He was able to do pranks right under the nose of anbu and jonin with his "kill me" - clothes so an ability that includes these skills or a trait which lets him do that effectively (maybe once again something kyubi enabled him to do) would be appreciated.
Him having a skill for hunting and cooking because he was dependent on it due to the villagers overpricing him or refusing to sell to him is also an option.
However that would require you to adjust his stats to be higher while also adjusting the other genin.
A higher Wis, Vit and Str Stat would be the logical conclusion and a "?" for his absurdly high luck (or scrap that stat altogether in favor of a trait (like luck of the fox or something).
BTW Vit could be the Stat responsible for Chakra and Int for effective use.
Then Sakura and Shikamaru could still have absurdly high Int while Naruto, Choji etc have more Chakra.
A weapon for Naruto could be a katana like his mother had. (she was called the red death after all)
Later on he could use the kunai his dad used when he's proficient enough in seals.
I would still go for wind - but in addition to that water.
If you decide to go for Haku as the (or one of) pairing than she could teach him waterjutsu.
Wind could be a huge advantage for the katana.
2/1/2022 c3 12Thicc-Chungs
not gonna lie with you. I dont mind you doing this gamer fic. but to me, I dont rate it much. gamer fics I really enjoy and love how people put their take on it this story I could enjoy it more if naruto himself had a character growth. like how you have said that the shinobi life is hard and how how he knows people are stronger than him. he had the talk about how being a shinobi isnt a childish matter. yet to me he still acts arrogant and has that big ego even though he is weak. he has a long way to go but he isnt taking his career to becoming hokage serious. if you make him realise that and he changes his personality abit then I think I can really enjoy it.
but atm it it just making me cringe with him just being like the manga/anime and not having character development
12Thicc-Chungsnot gonna lie with you. I dont mind you doing this gamer fic. but to me, I dont rate it much. gamer fics I really enjoy and love how people put their take on it this story I could enjoy it more if naruto himself had a character growth. like how you have said that the shinobi life is hard and how how he knows people are stronger than him. he had the talk about how being a shinobi isnt a childish matter. yet to me he still acts arrogant and has that big ego even though he is weak. he has a long way to go but he isnt taking his career to becoming hokage serious. if you make him realise that and he changes his personality abit then I think I can really enjoy it.
but atm it it just making me cringe with him just being like the manga/anime and not having character development
2/1/2022 c3 Seaoddon014
Welp for question 1: I'd say if zabuza dies I'd love to see him pick up the immortal cleaver
Question 2: I love Madara as a villain but orochimaru was the best stand alone villain of them all.
Welp for question 1: I'd say if zabuza dies I'd love to see him pick up the immortal cleaver
Question 2: I love Madara as a villain but orochimaru was the best stand alone villain of them all.
2/1/2022 c3 Blue Amateur
so far so good
I will be following this story with great interest.
Strength wise, I believe your Naruto is much weaker than he should be at this point in the story.
You have made it seem like the events took place over days when in reality they should have been genin for at least weeks if not months.
There should be about six months between graduation and the start of the Chunin Exams.
A Gamer character, especially one with as much chakra, stamina and the ability to do Shadow Clones should be much stronger in that timeframe.
Canon Naruto had the excuse of being dumb and not knowing what he was doing, but yours, which has access to the System to tell him when he is improving should definitely be much stronger.
Thank you for the chapter, I enjoy your writing, especially how Sakura is a normal human being, rather than just a Naruto-hating fangirl.
so far so good
I will be following this story with great interest.
Strength wise, I believe your Naruto is much weaker than he should be at this point in the story.
You have made it seem like the events took place over days when in reality they should have been genin for at least weeks if not months.
There should be about six months between graduation and the start of the Chunin Exams.
A Gamer character, especially one with as much chakra, stamina and the ability to do Shadow Clones should be much stronger in that timeframe.
Canon Naruto had the excuse of being dumb and not knowing what he was doing, but yours, which has access to the System to tell him when he is improving should definitely be much stronger.
Thank you for the chapter, I enjoy your writing, especially how Sakura is a normal human being, rather than just a Naruto-hating fangirl.
2/1/2022 c3 Glitner
i had hoped that he would stop being a hyperactive monkey ... that's the reason why i cant handle most of Naruto fanfics ... always being hyperactive and the fact that authors always go with the "he is to most unpredictable ninja" bla bla shit every time ... never a cool Naruto or a reliable etc etc always the same shit xD anyways good chapter
i had hoped that he would stop being a hyperactive monkey ... that's the reason why i cant handle most of Naruto fanfics ... always being hyperactive and the fact that authors always go with the "he is to most unpredictable ninja" bla bla shit every time ... never a cool Naruto or a reliable etc etc always the same shit xD anyways good chapter
2/1/2022 c3 Monfe7
I like Naruto using a war fan like Madara. His reserves overloading wind jutsu through that fan? Yes please. Otherwise, naginatas are dope.
Also agree with the villain. I think Pein is better but Madara is more badass.
Chapter length is excelent!
I like Naruto using a war fan like Madara. His reserves overloading wind jutsu through that fan? Yes please. Otherwise, naginatas are dope.
Also agree with the villain. I think Pein is better but Madara is more badass.
Chapter length is excelent!
2/1/2022 c3 Spellbat
Answer 1: Just give him the weapons Asuma used, whatever they are called.
Answer 2: I know you said it in the question itself, but Madara.
Answer 1: Just give him the weapons Asuma used, whatever they are called.
Answer 2: I know you said it in the question itself, but Madara.
2/1/2022 c3 ShadowStalker3424
For question one, I have always like short swords or a katana but katana are thin and brittle it does not really fit canon Naruto's character. I can imagine Naruto just going on a rampage with twin swords tho. Question 2 has to be Madara or maybe Obito they're speeches always got me emotional.. Author question in regards to word length? If increasing word length increases the time I have to wait for a new chapter then no.
For question one, I have always like short swords or a katana but katana are thin and brittle it does not really fit canon Naruto's character. I can imagine Naruto just going on a rampage with twin swords tho. Question 2 has to be Madara or maybe Obito they're speeches always got me emotional.. Author question in regards to word length? If increasing word length increases the time I have to wait for a new chapter then no.
2/1/2022 c3 JaimonDosFendu
Thanks for the chapter
And I found you adjusted his attitude finely enough it didn't feel cranky.
Good job !
Thanks for the chapter
And I found you adjusted his attitude finely enough it didn't feel cranky.
Good job !
1/30/2022 c2 Kurokawa Uzuna
hmm maybe water? or lightning? that's the mainstream one... if u want more different i suggest earth... since sasuke is fire bc of uchiha... there's really rare naruto with earth element unless it's a crossover with one piece...
hmm maybe water? or lightning? that's the mainstream one... if u want more different i suggest earth... since sasuke is fire bc of uchiha... there's really rare naruto with earth element unless it's a crossover with one piece...
1/30/2022 c2 sensoray
I feel like water would be a good second nature, because he's an Uzumaki. If he got lightning, AND had the Sasuke's taijutsu, the Sasuke starts to become irrelevant bc eventually due to the gamer system, Naruto would become better than Sasuke in those 2 aspects. Also, if Sasuke has fire/lightning and Sakura has earth, then the team will have all 5 elements covered.
I feel like water would be a good second nature, because he's an Uzumaki. If he got lightning, AND had the Sasuke's taijutsu, the Sasuke starts to become irrelevant bc eventually due to the gamer system, Naruto would become better than Sasuke in those 2 aspects. Also, if Sasuke has fire/lightning and Sakura has earth, then the team will have all 5 elements covered.