for A Good Brother3/17 c3 Chryseum
I feel like everyone else was too harsh on Rias. Most of the problems Rias almost caused was because of how little they trusted her by including her in discussing how he was going to cancel the betrothel. She would've never done any of this if she knew they were going to help her get out of it, instead they didn't bother telling her anything and making no indication they were even trying. After all she is just a teenager who doesn't want to be married to a rapist and would do anything to get out of that.
At the end of the day, although the plot is lacking, the real problem was that the smut was boring enough that it couldn't distract me from the plot at all. For all the kinks added to the story, the smut felt very simple and vanilla.
I feel like everyone else was too harsh on Rias. Most of the problems Rias almost caused was because of how little they trusted her by including her in discussing how he was going to cancel the betrothel. She would've never done any of this if she knew they were going to help her get out of it, instead they didn't bother telling her anything and making no indication they were even trying. After all she is just a teenager who doesn't want to be married to a rapist and would do anything to get out of that.
At the end of the day, although the plot is lacking, the real problem was that the smut was boring enough that it couldn't distract me from the plot at all. For all the kinks added to the story, the smut felt very simple and vanilla.
3/17 c2 Chryseum
Honestly it feels like Naruto is treating Rias and her marriage as an afterthought. Especially seeing as he hasn't even talked to her about it or his plan, and that he hasn't done 1 single thing to change anything from what we know was the situation between Rias and Riser in canon, even though Naruto has been the effective Head for years now. Wouldn't it be smarter to become the Gremory Head and change the deal himself? Or even fight a rating game against the Phenex head. I understand this is smut before plot and that you want to keep the plot close to the original, but it feels like Naruto is purposefully hurting Rias by inaction when he could do as little as talk with her about it to help but he can't even be bothered to do that.
Honestly it feels like Naruto is treating Rias and her marriage as an afterthought. Especially seeing as he hasn't even talked to her about it or his plan, and that he hasn't done 1 single thing to change anything from what we know was the situation between Rias and Riser in canon, even though Naruto has been the effective Head for years now. Wouldn't it be smarter to become the Gremory Head and change the deal himself? Or even fight a rating game against the Phenex head. I understand this is smut before plot and that you want to keep the plot close to the original, but it feels like Naruto is purposefully hurting Rias by inaction when he could do as little as talk with her about it to help but he can't even be bothered to do that.
12/12/2022 c3 
1Altair-chan
Good story, I like this because it's like a satire towards the dxd canon, where the demons seem to act more human than the humans themselves, and I find it entertaining and funny that you write them in this twisted way, as they really should be.
Now, i'm happy with the development and the girls that you gave to the protagonist, i really like the role of Grayfia with Naruto, that beautiful servanthood lol, for the other girls, they seem fine to me. I'm happy with grayfia being there, and she's always going to be one of the highlights of that show and one of my favorites.
1Altair-chanGood story, I like this because it's like a satire towards the dxd canon, where the demons seem to act more human than the humans themselves, and I find it entertaining and funny that you write them in this twisted way, as they really should be.
Now, i'm happy with the development and the girls that you gave to the protagonist, i really like the role of Grayfia with Naruto, that beautiful servanthood lol, for the other girls, they seem fine to me. I'm happy with grayfia being there, and she's always going to be one of the highlights of that show and one of my favorites.
11/24/2022 c1 Guest
incest is disgusting... I hope that in this fic Zeoticus has another wife that makes him happy.
incest is disgusting... I hope that in this fic Zeoticus has another wife that makes him happy.
11/21/2022 c3 aiman031122
damn that hot hope you will update soon because i really can't not wait to see what will happen next so has a nice day take care of your healty and stay safe update soon bye.
damn that hot hope you will update soon because i really can't not wait to see what will happen next so has a nice day take care of your healty and stay safe update soon bye.
11/20/2022 c3 Guest
Glad Rias isn't getting handed everything to her in a platter.
It would be even funnier if he fucks her whole peerage (minus Kiba and Issei of course) before her.
Hell just tease her until he finally fucks Ravel too, she can also be a cuck queen or not.
But her dumbass really needs to know her place
Glad Rias isn't getting handed everything to her in a platter.
It would be even funnier if he fucks her whole peerage (minus Kiba and Issei of course) before her.
Hell just tease her until he finally fucks Ravel too, she can also be a cuck queen or not.
But her dumbass really needs to know her place
11/20/2022 c2 Guest
Ya know it's ironic that Naruto is mad that Rias is keeping secrets from him when he's doing the same fucking thing lol.
Hypocrite.
I get why since Riasx isn't good at being subtle but he could've vaguely let her know that Naruto had a plan, she's dense as hell even when Akeno and the others told her he might have a plan.
Ya know it's ironic that Naruto is mad that Rias is keeping secrets from him when he's doing the same fucking thing lol.
Hypocrite.
I get why since Riasx isn't good at being subtle but he could've vaguely let her know that Naruto had a plan, she's dense as hell even when Akeno and the others told her he might have a plan.
11/18/2022 c3 js54300gmail.com
not going to lie, Zeoticus has the right idea about the family. Fuck Naruto and all of them and enjoy what fortune you do have. Don't shit you don't need and my guy did exactly that. Also lemons could use a bit of work, little more detail and exaggeration, helps add to the minds imagination of the scene
not going to lie, Zeoticus has the right idea about the family. Fuck Naruto and all of them and enjoy what fortune you do have. Don't shit you don't need and my guy did exactly that. Also lemons could use a bit of work, little more detail and exaggeration, helps add to the minds imagination of the scene
11/17/2022 c3 Clown Exorcist
Homie put Lesbian Relationships on a warning, I'm fucking dying HAHAHAHAHA
Homie put Lesbian Relationships on a warning, I'm fucking dying HAHAHAHAHA
11/16/2022 c3 Borello
interesting work.
interesting work.
11/16/2022 c1 11thunderofdeath97
Could you clarify what you mean by multiple partners? Like is it Naruto with a bunch of women, and the women are with more women? Or is it Naruto with a bunch of women, who are also with other guys as well?
11thunderofdeath97Could you clarify what you mean by multiple partners? Like is it Naruto with a bunch of women, and the women are with more women? Or is it Naruto with a bunch of women, who are also with other guys as well?
11/16/2022 c2 2bored peasant
Ok, so the only thing from the Naruto universe is the MC name? That is literally the only Naruto universe thing here, excepting kushina's name. This while thing could just be an OC. Or are you going to bring in Naruto elements later?
2bored peasantOk, so the only thing from the Naruto universe is the MC name? That is literally the only Naruto universe thing here, excepting kushina's name. This while thing could just be an OC. Or are you going to bring in Naruto elements later?