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for Oath Fulfilled and A New Tale Begins

8/14/2022 c1 FabledLife
That was unfortunate for what happened that led you to take down your stories.

As for this story, I think the class cards should be taken out as it would only create more problems for Shirou if anyone were to get their hands on them, and it would begin the whole class card retrieval situation again. The Class Cards contain portions of Heroic Spirits with powers and weapons beyond anything in Danmachi. If discovered, many Gods and Adventurers would want their hands on them. Though, if the cards only work for Shirou, then that would be a different story.

So the story takes place around 9 years before the main storyline where she is 7 years old at the time she will join the Loki Familia? Well, sucks for Bell since Shirou will have an influence toward Ais now.

Just in case here.

Shirou actually has an average Circuit capacity of around 20~30 units of magical energy in total. An averages Magus would have a total of 25 units of Magical Energy. The part where his circuits can barely hold 10 units is a mistranslation. The reason why it's in total rather than per Circuit is that the number of Circuits does nothing as long as there's more than one. In theory, the more Circuits there are, the higher the potential magical energy capacity, but one can also have a single Circuit with an incredibly high capacity. So Shirou's Circuit capacity is a total of around 20~30 units and NOT per Circuit.

Ya, I gotta agree with "Phantom Thieves of Hearts" about looking more into the Danmachi lore. Thanks to Shirou's existence, parts of the lore would likely change through his influence.

Yes, Elkenn is the author of "Blade in Kivotos". They had to take down the story along with the other stories for some reason.
8/14/2022 c1 kageroudaze13
Well I'am glad you write a another story but can I ask what happens to your other ones?
8/14/2022 c1 Phantom Thief of Hearts
Ok, interesting and original start. I'm happy to know that this isn't the cliche beginning that is used in every Danmachi fanfic and it's good to know that this fanfic takes place a long time before the Danmachi canon.

I suggest proper research on what Orario was like before canon and what events happened in the past (Astraea Record gives a lot of information about Orario's past and more information about other characters at that time, such as what the personality of a younger Ais was like , Ottar, Syr/Freya, information about the Zeus Familia and Hera Familia, etc).
And with Shirou's presence and possibly intervention, some of those events will be changed or prevented *cough*destruction of the Astraea familia *cough* *cough*The event where Filvis "died" *cough*

Personally, I don't care if you add or remove the cards from the plot but if you decide to keep the cards that Shirou is the only one to use them (and if possible Ais should use them too)...I admit that I also want to see Shirou use the other cards and not just limit him to using Emiya's powers

I am very curious to know if Shirou will avoid the Usagi Drop route in Ais...and for those who didn't understand the reference, basically I am referring to the possibility that Ais when she is 16 years old has romantic feelings for Shirou (I will assume that Shirou would think that Ais sees him as an adoptive older brother or something).

I admit I don't remember reading Starry Snowy Night or maybe I never read that fanfic, honestly I don't remember very well. So I can't make a comparison between the original version and the new version.

Now the million dollar question, Will Shirou get a Harem?. I'm just asking out of curiosity.

I hope you decide to use the events and characters from the Danmachi games (Orario Rhapsodia and MEMORIA FREESE) and the Danmachi movie.

...Your name seems familiar to me, elkenn. Were you the writer of Blade in Kivotos(Fate/Blue Archive fanfic)?
8/14/2022 c1 eberingf
Huh, a new story, noice.
However I haven‘t finished the previous story and I can‘t seem to read it again, did you take it down?
If so will I need info from that one to read this or is it a totally new story?
(also nice Elysia cover art for this
8/14/2022 c1 3Eldritch Namer
I'm glad you decided to pick the... pen...? Mouse...? Keyboard...? Whatever, I'm glad you decided to pick writing back up. Starry Snowy Night was one of the stories that I physically stopped whatever I was doing to read whenever it updated, so seeing it go was a shame. Still, it's always nice to see something new!

I do really like the parting between Miyu!Shirou and Illya's group. Though while I do feel like it was a bit brief and just quick back and forth between them, that's probably just me and my tendency to pad out the space between dialogue with overbearing descriptions. Other than that, you did fantastic. It feels short, but even a good chapter with 10,000 meaty words would feel short by the time I finish it.

Though with that said, I do still feel quite awkward since I still plan on making my own Miyu!Shirou/Danmachi Fic. If you had both Starry Snowy Night and and this story up at the same time, I'd feel like I'd just be copying elements from both stories.

Because my current idea involves taking Miyu!Shirou and dropping him into Danmachi, same as you. Specifically, taking Miyu!Shirou from the current arc, which I call the 'Pandora Arc' (Which you did with this story, though my vision of what happens is much more... cruel to Shirou), and involving him with Astraea Familia (Which you did in Starry Snowy Night. Though I'd look deep in the Light Novels and Astraea Record for more juicy lore) I still plan on working on it, but still, having seen both this story and its predecessor, I do feel a bit vexed.

Those are just my personal feelings though. Once again, it's great to see you start up again!
8/14/2022 c1 sxs4
Author, don't give up again please.
Is there any chance for you to repost your previous story again?

It's a good beginning, better than previous danmachixfate one.
I see this time's pairing is shirouxaiz? Do you intend to have bell alive in this series?
8/14/2022 c1 RNGuy
Man I hope whatever happened didn't happen again.
I was really curious about your other fatexdanmachi fic.

You got me teared up immediately in 1 chap.
I like how you approach the story by having shiro saving aiz instead of his father like in the canon.

And yeah, I guess class cards are better removed... since it only hold a fraction of a servant's power. Not really worth to keep since shirou has enhanced abilities and magic circuits.
8/14/2022 c1 Dasgun
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