9/9/2022 c5 Concerned Guest
Having a beta certainly did improve the quality.

Some tips I could offer is that you should avoid writing 'he [adjective such as said or asked]' after a person speaks as it could become repetitive when there's a conversation between people. There's nothing wrong with having it, but don't have it too much.

What you could also do is be descriptive in your story. Have one paragraph dedicated to describing the scenery, how a person looks or acts, or even the smell of the environment. A saying I have is to put the reader in a setting with words alone.

I offer these criticisms not to belittle your story, but to give you feedback on what you could do to improve your writing. To answer your question in chapter 4, stories that have an interesting idea that no one else has written before, and good writing to execute that idea are the two main reasons why they have so many followers and favorites.

8/29/2022 c2 2selfishgecko
I had some hopes for this but the 2nd chapter ruined it hope you can find people who like this story.