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for The soul of The Huntsmen

7/5 c1 gweenace
When does the english become not awful? Run this through a word processor at least, im dyin here
3/17 c13 Remuria
I'm definitely enjoying the story, also like the parallel storylines between past and present, it's a rather neat addition! There are a few typos in some of the chapters such as in this one 'discretion' seems like it was meant to be 'description' or last chapter I think there Jaune was going to "Blake locker" as opposed to "Blake's locker", some missing capitalizations and some missing words sprinkled through chapters. It's not a deal breaker for me as the story is still plenty coherent, but it'd be nice if they well weren't there
3/12 c1 4HaziX WeeK
behaartzas, so you don’t like me using a canon plot point in my story?, welp guess you'll need to take it with the writer of the show, also who said im going to make jaune the same as canon, i may change it or may not, and as you said aura is the soul, and semblance is the extension, so 2 kind souls raining another would result in the same, as mentioned from people who knows both jaune and his parents, he inherited their kindness.
also also this is my story, if i want jaune to just have aura stealing semblance i will make it. (im not planning on doing it)
3/10 c10 behaartzas
for a guy who is responsible for the author for some reason, are you his mother?Or who?anyway, I've already written that this damn site is eating up my words genius. and everything is especially bad with the reviews under this story, so the review to it is left for days by you understand the days?well, with regard to the fact that jaune allegedly inherited something, I have already written why I don't like self-expression of the soul was reduced to a simple to the canons of sembbalance, this is an extension of your soul and not an inheritance of family only one who has it is schnee and it's a damn plot hole.
in your is a review and I can write whatever I want in it.
3/9 c10 1joshben4c
behaartzas, this is a fanfiction, the writer can write whatever they want.
I personally like the way the author is deviating from Canon.
On the other hand, honest feedback is great for any writer, so thankyou for giving that. But your review is hard to read with the spelling and grammar errors. Can you please use a spell check or similar?
To the Author, I'm quite enjoying this. I originally thought Juane's mom only had healing abilities, and was excited to see a bit of world building where Juane essentially got a hereditary blend of his parent's semblance essentially creating something better than both of his parent's.
3/9 c2 joshben4c
I love how Juniper's healing and Nicholas's boost semblance make sense. I can totally see Jaune's Canon Aura Amp semblance being a mix of the 2 from being their kid.
Now here's the crazy part imaging Juane using Aura Amp on his Dad or Mom, His mom can power heal, and his Father could possibly multiply his boost semblance making his already overpowered several times stronger, depending on how Aura Amp works.
2/29 c9 behaartzas
It's strange that grimm and human hybrids have already appeared, since I don't think Salem would send them to the city at this stage of the war, but there is always Merlot who can work with Salem.
well, now with regard to the thing that sticks out in the chapter like a rotten log in a clear clearing.a rocket in the shield that will also fly out of the I need to be told that due to the lack of a normal trunk, she could fly anywhere at all?I know that this is the world of rwby and there are a lot of strange things like mechashift, but even they follow some kind of keeping explosives in a shield with which you block blows is as stupid as that this dust is most likely volatile, every time he hits the shield, he risks what the hell is wrong with the force of the explosion?He forces the dust into the rocket to increase the power of the explosion?so according to what is written in the chapter, it is not could a small rocket fit in a shield at all?especially with such an explosive force?Wouldn't it have been easier for her to give a small rocket launcher pistol from which flares are fired?
in fact, I have already described what is wrong with the fact that you put a rocket in the 's up to you to fix it or not.
2/8 c8 behaartzas
you know, I came across your story again and reread my review, which again came without part of the words and belatedly.I was being unfair.
Yes, for some reason you completely ignored Roman's backstory and made him a hunter.I still don't understand why.
the whole thing with hereditary semalance and the fact that the strq team had its own sister team is still pretty dubious, but I still don't like that you reduced the expression of jaune's soul to a simple inheritance.
but after reading this chapter, I liked how you wrote the character of jaune in the context of changing dynamics in the general, if you really don't just copy the story arcs of the canon and make your own, or maybe you won't forcibly drag jaune into the main plot of the show but send him to his own journey, I would say that the story is not bad.
Actually, now that I think about it, given the context of the story, all the canonical arches like docks, highway battles, and how rwby went to Glen Mountain won't make sense in the context of the changes that you made, so I really hope that you won't repeat them.
2/8 c1 3odstrules21
Honestly liking the concept so far. Only thing you could work on is the grammar but that's about it. Keep going.
1/17 c4 behaartzas
well, first of all I want to say that this site has lost some of my words in the comment (again).and for some reason, the review came for several be honest, I already thought that he would not come.I hope at least this comment will be fine.
Well, first of all, what the hell is the hereditary similarity of the jaune family?why is it necessary at the canon, this is just a plot hole, since it is not explained in any way. sembalance, which emphasized the character of jaune, was reduced to some kind of ?By the way, I remind you that in the canon jaune withstood the blow of the mech and charged his aura from yellow to green in a few the likeness of his father looks strange against this background.
To be honest, it's just weird to make a guy out of ozpin who collects the same teams in a , this fan-made bullshit that the strq team had its own sister the information that we have, there was nothing like that.
To be honest, you made a mess of phonon ideas out of and Roman were not on the same was in the Mistral in general and started out as an errand boy for he was never a hunter and had nothing to do with Glenn the way, I even wrote in the last comment that his brief background is on the wiki.
I quickly looked through the new chapters and the question is still the same. the point of this story is that despite all the changes you made, leave all the cannonball events even though you changed a lot?again, all this fighting on the highway, the docks, Mount Glenn, the battle for food and ?If you're going to do an original story, do it right had no problem rewriting roman's , it's groundhog day.
1/16 c4 behaartzas
well, first of all I want to say that this site has lost some of my words in the comment (again).and for some reason, the review came for several be honest, I already thought that he would not come.I hope at least this comment will be fine.
Well, first of all, what the hell is the hereditary similarity of the jaune family?why is it necessary at the canon, this is just a plot hole, since it is not explained in any way. sembalance, which emphasized the character of jaune, was reduced to some kind of ?By the way, I remind you that in the canon jaune withstood the blow of the mech and charged his aura from yellow to green in a few the likeness of his father looks strange against this background.
To be honest, it's just weird to make a guy out of ozpin who collects the same teams in a , this fan-made bullshit that the strq team had its own sister the information that we have, there was nothing like that.
To be honest, you made a mess of phonon ideas out of and Roman were not on the same was in the Mistral in general and started out as an errand boy for he was never a hunter and had nothing to do with Glenn the way, I even wrote in the last comment that his brief background is on the wiki.
I quickly looked through the new chapters and the question is still the same. the point of this story is that despite all the changes you made, leave all the cannonball events even though you changed a lot?again, all this fighting on the highway, the docks, Mount Glenn, the battle for food and ?If you're going to do an original story, do it right had no problem rewriting roman's , it's groundhog day.
1/15 c3 SmooTheDuke
I very much like where this going
1/17 c1 4HaziX WeeK
im trying to reread each chapter to find the mistakes, idk how the beta works, but I'll look into it
1/17 c1 2TheSlySage
this is interesting, might need a beta reader as there were quite a bit of grammatical and spelling issues but I like the concept
1/15 c2 4HaziX WeeK
to answer the questionthe semblance Resemblance is similar to the schnee semblance, its a semblance getting passed to the next generation, while not Entirely the same as jaune, his father semblance work on him alone and runs out fast, while jaune can use it on himself or others not to the same power as his father, and jaune looks up to his father, he see in him what true huntsman is and try to be like him, on his mother, i actually took the name from one of the fics i read, basically i took all of jaune family name and put it here.

JNBR team is basically team JNPR, im trying to show that ozpin doing what he did in the past,(this is a spoiler for later so i won't say, there is a reason im putting a flashback at the start of ever chaper).

aslo on roman, from what i know of the character, he and Oobleck were on the same team and had something to do with mt glenn(which i have big plans for) and i didn’t want some connection to fo with, i mean imagine what will happen when team jnpr and rwby finished the fight, youll still visit each other from time to time( and with what im planning for roman his actions will make sense).

thank you for the comment btw, but almost all of your Complaints are just unexpected because it just started
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