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6/16 c1 10starfiction123
Ok this is without a doubt one of the best DB gochi's I've read on FF for a while! The DB references and history was flawless perfectly in character I love that it's like DBS done right with everyone involved lol especially a beautiful highlight on my girl mommy chi and bet feistiness! THIS was perfect! Lol
3/18 c1 Guest
Great story, I really enjoyed reading it. Although I kinda feel like some things were not really answered. Who were theses guys that kidnapped ChiChi and why did they do it? To challenge Goku?
3/17 c1 6Literal Winter
Good to see you publishing a story again, glad that you're back at it!

I have to say that this story is certainly an interesting one to read, and I have to admit it leaves me with a lot of questions by the end of it, especially considering this is a one shot with no further story to to explain things.

I gathered based on your descriptions that it was Seventeen, Eighteen, Tien and Yamcha who had kidnapped Chi-Chi, but I couldn't really picture them doing something like this so that's my first point of confusion. The second point would be that if it truly was the likes of Tien or Yamcha then Krillin and Goku would surely recognise their longtime allies, even if by voice alone, even Chi-Chi should be able to recognise at least Yamcha's voice.

The only reasoning I could see for this would be that Krillin would be in on this crazy scheme, but I struggle to see him going through with something like this, especially for no clear reasoning. I guess what my main overall point is there's a lot of unresolved plot points here and perhaps there needs to be a second part to clarify what this was all about.

On another note it was good to read what you did here with the Goku and Chi-Chi relationship, I think you highlighted the bond and understanding between the two in a way that make sense and does justice for their characters. Seeing Goku come in as her hero ties back into the OG Dragon Ball story and it's cool to see all the references you made to it.

So yeah needless to say I'm a bit confused, but the story is well written and I like what you've done, it probably just needs another chapter or something to help make sense of things.

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