for What is Love?1/5/2005 c4 
1Puchu-chan
wow, I love the story~!
You seem to change a lot between the past and present tense, which isn't too good, cause it confuses the reader, and the story doesn't flow as smoothly as it should, which is unfortunate, since the plotline seems to be really good. Also, at certain places, you start a lot of sentences alike (starting a lot of sentences in a row with "he", as an example), and it's better if you... find synonyms, or make it into a single sentence, with the aid of my dear friend comma. But please continue, I really want to read on~!
1Puchu-chanwow, I love the story~!
You seem to change a lot between the past and present tense, which isn't too good, cause it confuses the reader, and the story doesn't flow as smoothly as it should, which is unfortunate, since the plotline seems to be really good. Also, at certain places, you start a lot of sentences alike (starting a lot of sentences in a row with "he", as an example), and it's better if you... find synonyms, or make it into a single sentence, with the aid of my dear friend comma. But please continue, I really want to read on~!
12/13/2004 c4 6Pale Rider
No offense is taken. Please understand that if I thought your writing was worthless I wouldn't have bothered to review at all. I thought there was potential here, so I wanted to point you in the direction of improving your writing.
A good step to take would be to develop some backstory. Why is the world like this? Why are Iruka and Kakashi being cruel? What is Naruto's take on his life, and why does he continue living? What the hell is wrong with this school, that the principal can make a pass at a student and obvious signs of abuse are ignored? Even if you never write out the backstory for us to read, you'll find that as you develop the past, the direction the future will take becomes apparent.
I hope your grandmother gets better soon.
6Pale RiderNo offense is taken. Please understand that if I thought your writing was worthless I wouldn't have bothered to review at all. I thought there was potential here, so I wanted to point you in the direction of improving your writing.
A good step to take would be to develop some backstory. Why is the world like this? Why are Iruka and Kakashi being cruel? What is Naruto's take on his life, and why does he continue living? What the hell is wrong with this school, that the principal can make a pass at a student and obvious signs of abuse are ignored? Even if you never write out the backstory for us to read, you'll find that as you develop the past, the direction the future will take becomes apparent.
I hope your grandmother gets better soon.
12/12/2004 c4 nkdsanklsandl
Hey, I read about what happened with your grandma. I hope she doesn't die... mine died last April for similar problems, but they weren't fast enough with the surgery. Luckily, they know about your grandma and hopefully, everything will turn out okay.
I was going through your reviews, because its a hobby of mine - especially the reviews of writer's notes. Don't ask me why, it just is.
Just continue with the story soon, I agree with my (well if I say "colleagues" that makes me seem on equal grounds with them, and well... yeah, a lot of them I consider better than me so I'll just say..) fellow reviewers. I haven't read this review that you got depressed about or what have you... mainly because I'm lazy and you have several long reviews so readin all of them would be like killing myself for random reasons. Don't ask...
If you ahve a thousand people saying that they love your story, and yet one person - or even two - say that it sucks, who are you going to believe? Listen to the person who critisizes, but only to an extent. It depends on how well they critizise, actually. The first flame I got in my life was a few years ago in which the flamer said "it sucks u asshole" and I still remember it. That's what I call a flame, because they didn't say what they liked and didn't like. If it was honest to the infallible constructive critism (jeez, I need to learn how to spell this word) then you have nothing to worry about.
You have a lot of things going on in life right now... but you can't give up. Ever seen Galaxy Quest with Tim Allen - do you remember what he says? Never give up, never surrender. That's the way you gotta take these things head on. I don't know - through good times and bad, I'm generally an optomistic person. It's just how I was born. *shrugs* Shit happens - you face it, and you spray air freshoner in its face (Dogmas reference, don't mind it). If you want to be a writer - or if you call yourself a writer, then there's one thing that you can do that will help you right about now.
Write. That's all I can say really. If you want to get out of this funk you've found yourself in, then write. Take out a piece of paper and a pen and just let the feelings flow out of you. That's how I've always looked at it.
As I've said, I've breezed through your reviews to try and locate this review. I think I foudn it. Remember this - that person wrote it that way to help you. It's the best that cna be done. Critising someone's work or recieving critism is never fun. Whenever I do it, I realize that I don't want to hurt the person's feelings but I don't want to make it seem like I'm better than them. It's gonna hurt, but you're still in the ballpark, neh? As cliche as it sounds, it's not the bottom of the ninth here! You've still got time.
Sorry if I sound preachy... I just began typing and this is what came out. ^_^
Hey, I read about what happened with your grandma. I hope she doesn't die... mine died last April for similar problems, but they weren't fast enough with the surgery. Luckily, they know about your grandma and hopefully, everything will turn out okay.
I was going through your reviews, because its a hobby of mine - especially the reviews of writer's notes. Don't ask me why, it just is.
Just continue with the story soon, I agree with my (well if I say "colleagues" that makes me seem on equal grounds with them, and well... yeah, a lot of them I consider better than me so I'll just say..) fellow reviewers. I haven't read this review that you got depressed about or what have you... mainly because I'm lazy and you have several long reviews so readin all of them would be like killing myself for random reasons. Don't ask...
If you ahve a thousand people saying that they love your story, and yet one person - or even two - say that it sucks, who are you going to believe? Listen to the person who critisizes, but only to an extent. It depends on how well they critizise, actually. The first flame I got in my life was a few years ago in which the flamer said "it sucks u asshole" and I still remember it. That's what I call a flame, because they didn't say what they liked and didn't like. If it was honest to the infallible constructive critism (jeez, I need to learn how to spell this word) then you have nothing to worry about.
You have a lot of things going on in life right now... but you can't give up. Ever seen Galaxy Quest with Tim Allen - do you remember what he says? Never give up, never surrender. That's the way you gotta take these things head on. I don't know - through good times and bad, I'm generally an optomistic person. It's just how I was born. *shrugs* Shit happens - you face it, and you spray air freshoner in its face (Dogmas reference, don't mind it). If you want to be a writer - or if you call yourself a writer, then there's one thing that you can do that will help you right about now.
Write. That's all I can say really. If you want to get out of this funk you've found yourself in, then write. Take out a piece of paper and a pen and just let the feelings flow out of you. That's how I've always looked at it.
As I've said, I've breezed through your reviews to try and locate this review. I think I foudn it. Remember this - that person wrote it that way to help you. It's the best that cna be done. Critising someone's work or recieving critism is never fun. Whenever I do it, I realize that I don't want to hurt the person's feelings but I don't want to make it seem like I'm better than them. It's gonna hurt, but you're still in the ballpark, neh? As cliche as it sounds, it's not the bottom of the ninth here! You've still got time.
Sorry if I sound preachy... I just began typing and this is what came out. ^_^
12/12/2004 c4 8Hatsumi Narita
Don't stop. I really liked the story. If you don't like your writing revise your stories.Or write the next chapters with a new style. I hope you write more soon. It would be a shame if you didn't continue and didn't post more fics.
8Hatsumi NaritaDon't stop. I really liked the story. If you don't like your writing revise your stories.Or write the next chapters with a new style. I hope you write more soon. It would be a shame if you didn't continue and didn't post more fics.
12/11/2004 c4 WHAT
heh heh don't you just love the constructive criticism. They want you to continue...just make it better.
I personally liked the story. Make it better?
Im LOVING it! seriously!
I found nothing wrong with the story...the way you set things up it would be easy to explain everything later. THEY want you to write a profesional novel that will be published and sold to millions. Your writing style is fine for a fanfic I mean your not writing a novel are you? that review and many others sounded like one of my english teachers.
My point...THIS is a fanfic not a novel, the purpose is for our/your enjoyment. UNPROFESIONAL AND ANONYMOUS enjoyment!
*cries* please update I haven't read a good angsty story like this in a while!
*pause to read story again*
T.T I loved it! what was wrong with it...it didn't seemed rushed to me and as for explaining things you could easily do it now! if You tried writing what THEY (critics) want you to...a novel, I probably wouldn't read it...had I wanted to read something like THAT I would go to the library.
It is perfectly fine the way it is...so what some people don't like your writing style...people often give better advice then use it themselves.
a favorite quote of mine "don't give up just because things are not the way you want them to be."
make it better *laughs* how.. this is like one of THE perfect angst stories.
Please don't discontinue this. I am trying to make this review as long as possible to take up a lot of space and to encourage you further.
You can't always meet up to everyones expectations, espically ones that want you to change for them. So I say just please the common man...the ones who are satisfied with who you are now. This applies to your writing style/story by the way.
I hope you understand now that you should still update Its pefrect the way it is. They can write their own story if they want it that way...*laughs* like they can.
A story like that takes months of preparation. I should know. Even then you can't satisfy everyone. Someone always ...ARGH!
anyways ya angst stories are good! especially this one. YA I just realized that even though I made a point (forget the critics and focus on the fans and update) I have been rambling and really saying nothing while saying eveything.
*rereads review*
yes I think that is all
so what do you say? convinced yet?
heh heh don't you just love the constructive criticism. They want you to continue...just make it better.
I personally liked the story. Make it better?
Im LOVING it! seriously!
I found nothing wrong with the story...the way you set things up it would be easy to explain everything later. THEY want you to write a profesional novel that will be published and sold to millions. Your writing style is fine for a fanfic I mean your not writing a novel are you? that review and many others sounded like one of my english teachers.
My point...THIS is a fanfic not a novel, the purpose is for our/your enjoyment. UNPROFESIONAL AND ANONYMOUS enjoyment!
*cries* please update I haven't read a good angsty story like this in a while!
*pause to read story again*
T.T I loved it! what was wrong with it...it didn't seemed rushed to me and as for explaining things you could easily do it now! if You tried writing what THEY (critics) want you to...a novel, I probably wouldn't read it...had I wanted to read something like THAT I would go to the library.
It is perfectly fine the way it is...so what some people don't like your writing style...people often give better advice then use it themselves.
a favorite quote of mine "don't give up just because things are not the way you want them to be."
make it better *laughs* how.. this is like one of THE perfect angst stories.
Please don't discontinue this. I am trying to make this review as long as possible to take up a lot of space and to encourage you further.
You can't always meet up to everyones expectations, espically ones that want you to change for them. So I say just please the common man...the ones who are satisfied with who you are now. This applies to your writing style/story by the way.
I hope you understand now that you should still update Its pefrect the way it is. They can write their own story if they want it that way...*laughs* like they can.
A story like that takes months of preparation. I should know. Even then you can't satisfy everyone. Someone always ...ARGH!
anyways ya angst stories are good! especially this one. YA I just realized that even though I made a point (forget the critics and focus on the fans and update) I have been rambling and really saying nothing while saying eveything.
*rereads review*
yes I think that is all
so what do you say? convinced yet?
12/11/2004 c4 Me
** and one more for good measure *fwap* Stop being all mopey. If you really want to improve on your writing, don't stop. I thought that much wouyld have been obvious to you. And who cares if your story isn't the best one that person's ever read. That was what we writers like to call "criticism"
As a writer, you need to be willing to take suggestions and flames from others. J.K. Rowling has probably recieved enough hate mail to fill a warehouse. Did she quit writing? No. So here you are, ready to quit because of one review that was meant to help you? I'm sorry, but that's sad.
Whe I write,I tell people to criticize me. I want them to tell me how to improve my writing. You're never going to get better unless you go through the trial and error process. Everone makes mistakes. Everyone on FF has probably recieved a flame or criticism. I know I have. Mostly they were about minor errors because of my lack of beta reader. Go look at all the reviews saying they think it's wrong to quit. They all want you to continue to write. Why? Becasue they're enjoying your story.
Writing on FF is not mostly about how satisfied you are, but how you can draw people into your story. There are a lot of peopple who turn out chapters they really don't like. But they keep writing because their reviewers help them out.
So maybe your writing style doesn't appeal to everyone who comes across your fic. It's inevitable. There will be someone who doesn't like your story. It's a fact you just have to accept. But aren't all those positive reviews worth it? I know I fell loved when I get a review back for my fic saying they can't wait for the next chapter.
Personally, I think it's pathetic that you feel the need to discontinue three stories that didn't even have the chance to develop. This one was only three chapters in. There is plenty of time to define your characters and the plot. If you feel the need to, re-do the story, go back and add more detail. Make it so you're satisfied with it. Then go get a beta reader to proof-read it for you and week out any errors and inconsistancies (look at the big word I used!). You already have someone that offered to be a beta tester for you. You should take full advantage of that. That person can help you and give you tips for improvement. Go read one of their stories and see if you think that person can really help you.
How long have you been writing fanfics for now? I know I've been writing since middle school, when I was writing a Harry Potter one that was over 400 pages long and it took up an entire binder (it's still not finished...;;). Good writing takes time and experience.
Ask people for plot ideas, things they want to see happen in the story. Get your readers involved. Just don't give up. That's like saying all that work put forth to write those fics was wasted. And I can tell you it wasn't. I enjoyed all three of your stories and would really like to see them updated. I'm not the only one. Just look at all the supportive reviews you have. To me, there is nothing worse than an abandoned fic, and in your case, there are three.
Who knows how long it will take you to become, in your eyes, a good writer. Dies it really matter? FF is for people to write about their ideas and show them to other people. You definatly have interesting ideas. I love AU high school fics, and there aren't very many good ones out there, and I'd hate to see one less because you recieved one review on what you could improve on.
** and one more for good measure *fwap* Stop being all mopey. If you really want to improve on your writing, don't stop. I thought that much wouyld have been obvious to you. And who cares if your story isn't the best one that person's ever read. That was what we writers like to call "criticism"
As a writer, you need to be willing to take suggestions and flames from others. J.K. Rowling has probably recieved enough hate mail to fill a warehouse. Did she quit writing? No. So here you are, ready to quit because of one review that was meant to help you? I'm sorry, but that's sad.
Whe I write,I tell people to criticize me. I want them to tell me how to improve my writing. You're never going to get better unless you go through the trial and error process. Everone makes mistakes. Everyone on FF has probably recieved a flame or criticism. I know I have. Mostly they were about minor errors because of my lack of beta reader. Go look at all the reviews saying they think it's wrong to quit. They all want you to continue to write. Why? Becasue they're enjoying your story.
Writing on FF is not mostly about how satisfied you are, but how you can draw people into your story. There are a lot of peopple who turn out chapters they really don't like. But they keep writing because their reviewers help them out.
So maybe your writing style doesn't appeal to everyone who comes across your fic. It's inevitable. There will be someone who doesn't like your story. It's a fact you just have to accept. But aren't all those positive reviews worth it? I know I fell loved when I get a review back for my fic saying they can't wait for the next chapter.
Personally, I think it's pathetic that you feel the need to discontinue three stories that didn't even have the chance to develop. This one was only three chapters in. There is plenty of time to define your characters and the plot. If you feel the need to, re-do the story, go back and add more detail. Make it so you're satisfied with it. Then go get a beta reader to proof-read it for you and week out any errors and inconsistancies (look at the big word I used!). You already have someone that offered to be a beta tester for you. You should take full advantage of that. That person can help you and give you tips for improvement. Go read one of their stories and see if you think that person can really help you.
How long have you been writing fanfics for now? I know I've been writing since middle school, when I was writing a Harry Potter one that was over 400 pages long and it took up an entire binder (it's still not finished...;;). Good writing takes time and experience.
Ask people for plot ideas, things they want to see happen in the story. Get your readers involved. Just don't give up. That's like saying all that work put forth to write those fics was wasted. And I can tell you it wasn't. I enjoyed all three of your stories and would really like to see them updated. I'm not the only one. Just look at all the supportive reviews you have. To me, there is nothing worse than an abandoned fic, and in your case, there are three.
Who knows how long it will take you to become, in your eyes, a good writer. Dies it really matter? FF is for people to write about their ideas and show them to other people. You definatly have interesting ideas. I love AU high school fics, and there aren't very many good ones out there, and I'd hate to see one less because you recieved one review on what you could improve on.
12/11/2004 c4 1Malitia
WTF! they're trying to HELP YOU! they aren't trying to get ur stories off! whats the matter with you! one review and u go into a fit of mad depression! GOOD AUTHORS YOU CAN'T PLEASE THE WHOLE WORLD.. theres always going to be some random asshole who wants to spoil it for the rest because they got something shoved far up their ass
1MalitiaWTF! they're trying to HELP YOU! they aren't trying to get ur stories off! whats the matter with you! one review and u go into a fit of mad depression! GOOD AUTHORS YOU CAN'T PLEASE THE WHOLE WORLD.. theres always going to be some random asshole who wants to spoil it for the rest because they got something shoved far up their ass
12/11/2004 c4 JadeTiger
oh for god sake suck it up will you! THAT review was a very very positve one. See i'll point out a few thing you missed when you read it first time round.
She/he didn't hall off and say, "You story sucks and you can't write a story to save your mother."
'I' got one of those and thats after i got 351 reviews from people crying for me to update more. You think ONE review where someone says, very kindly, that your story has a few loop holes in it. And then following it up with helpfull tips and instructions on how you can make this fic in a number one favorited naruto fic, is a bad thing and you throw in the towle?
FUCK! i'd bitch slap you right now if i could and tell you to smarten up and get back IN THERE! HOW the hell do you expect to get any better sitting there on your ass?
I WISH i got reviws like that! People who CARE enought about you and your story to put time and effort into writing out a long review, with helpfull hits and tips and words of incourgment!
can't you see that there are other out there who are trying to help you get better? if you got and read MY fics you'll see how BAD i was when i started! Hell! its like a baby book what i wrote! The only way to get better is to keep trying!
and so what if someone don't like it? you realy expect to please THE WORLD! Be happy if you please just yourself! I havne't pleased myself for the last 3 fic's i've writen! i'm still not happy with anything i've got really. my good work was lost when my pc was reformated.
*sigh* listen ok? you need to realize the world isn't out to get you, and that not everyone's gonna be happy. But there are others out there like that reviewer that see the potential in you to become somehting great! something beyone even your imagination! you can do it and there are others out there who will help you, you just need to realize it.
you do have a creative mind and great flow for fics and stories but you just need to sharpen these skills. this reviwer is trying to help you do that, by pointing out things in your fics that you see or might not see and giveing you advice on how to fix it.
that was a GOOD review! it came from the heart of a write and a fan of your fic who wasn't you to become great! they took alot of time into making that review sound just they way they felt and how they felt you would take that advice.
critsum is never pretty, but thats what makes you go on to make something even better. to prove to that person that what they said was wrong! it might take you another 12 fics, maybe 29, maybe 100 who knows! but if you keep writing and keep taking the advice that others around you give then soon you will be recieving prasses from them not critisum.
just keep the fath. k
oh for god sake suck it up will you! THAT review was a very very positve one. See i'll point out a few thing you missed when you read it first time round.
She/he didn't hall off and say, "You story sucks and you can't write a story to save your mother."
'I' got one of those and thats after i got 351 reviews from people crying for me to update more. You think ONE review where someone says, very kindly, that your story has a few loop holes in it. And then following it up with helpfull tips and instructions on how you can make this fic in a number one favorited naruto fic, is a bad thing and you throw in the towle?
FUCK! i'd bitch slap you right now if i could and tell you to smarten up and get back IN THERE! HOW the hell do you expect to get any better sitting there on your ass?
I WISH i got reviws like that! People who CARE enought about you and your story to put time and effort into writing out a long review, with helpfull hits and tips and words of incourgment!
can't you see that there are other out there who are trying to help you get better? if you got and read MY fics you'll see how BAD i was when i started! Hell! its like a baby book what i wrote! The only way to get better is to keep trying!
and so what if someone don't like it? you realy expect to please THE WORLD! Be happy if you please just yourself! I havne't pleased myself for the last 3 fic's i've writen! i'm still not happy with anything i've got really. my good work was lost when my pc was reformated.
*sigh* listen ok? you need to realize the world isn't out to get you, and that not everyone's gonna be happy. But there are others out there like that reviewer that see the potential in you to become somehting great! something beyone even your imagination! you can do it and there are others out there who will help you, you just need to realize it.
you do have a creative mind and great flow for fics and stories but you just need to sharpen these skills. this reviwer is trying to help you do that, by pointing out things in your fics that you see or might not see and giveing you advice on how to fix it.
that was a GOOD review! it came from the heart of a write and a fan of your fic who wasn't you to become great! they took alot of time into making that review sound just they way they felt and how they felt you would take that advice.
critsum is never pretty, but thats what makes you go on to make something even better. to prove to that person that what they said was wrong! it might take you another 12 fics, maybe 29, maybe 100 who knows! but if you keep writing and keep taking the advice that others around you give then soon you will be recieving prasses from them not critisum.
just keep the fath. k
12/11/2004 c4 8Kisu
wow wat a harsh review. the reviewer must be a hardcore sasunaru fan or something..but i agree that your story seemed a bit rushed. just look it over and figure out your plot...becuz angsty stories are good. i think im a bad writer myself, but i try to expand on my "talent" coughcough" instead of just hindering it.
so i believe you should just expand more on your writing and clarify more. i'll be waiting for your next update!
8Kisuwow wat a harsh review. the reviewer must be a hardcore sasunaru fan or something..but i agree that your story seemed a bit rushed. just look it over and figure out your plot...becuz angsty stories are good. i think im a bad writer myself, but i try to expand on my "talent" coughcough" instead of just hindering it.
so i believe you should just expand more on your writing and clarify more. i'll be waiting for your next update!
12/11/2004 c4 40Falcon-Rider
I think that instead of completly discontinuing all of your story's, instead you should take one and redo it completely. Like this, perhaps. The point of writing fanfiction, at least in my eyes, is to improve your writing. Fanfiction is written for fun by fans of a television show, and I like to think that just as this review box suggests, that it is a way for readers/writers to help other writers grow by telling them what they need to improve on. The review you cite in this last chapter of "what is love?" does just that.
So, I propose that instead of dropping every thing and giving up you try to improve. To grow as a writer and teach yourself how to make characters grow from "two dimensional" or "One-note psychotic freak"'s. Force yourself to read and expand chapters after they are written- to flesh out the details and character traits.
The point of fanfiction is to learn and to help others learn, not to be novelists writing for money.
Please continue writing, I for one believe that you have potential... you are only just in High school, ne? A lot of the "really good writers" are in college or beyond. You're still growing as a writer, don't just give up now.
Practice helps one to improve. Giving up leads no where.
Elizabeth aka Falcon-Rider
PS - I like to think I have improved greatly since I started posting fics on I have been on since before I started HS, I am now a senior in HS. I like to think my fics show my growth as a writer.
Anyway, have a good day, and DON'T STOP WRITING!
40Falcon-RiderI think that instead of completly discontinuing all of your story's, instead you should take one and redo it completely. Like this, perhaps. The point of writing fanfiction, at least in my eyes, is to improve your writing. Fanfiction is written for fun by fans of a television show, and I like to think that just as this review box suggests, that it is a way for readers/writers to help other writers grow by telling them what they need to improve on. The review you cite in this last chapter of "what is love?" does just that.
So, I propose that instead of dropping every thing and giving up you try to improve. To grow as a writer and teach yourself how to make characters grow from "two dimensional" or "One-note psychotic freak"'s. Force yourself to read and expand chapters after they are written- to flesh out the details and character traits.
The point of fanfiction is to learn and to help others learn, not to be novelists writing for money.
Please continue writing, I for one believe that you have potential... you are only just in High school, ne? A lot of the "really good writers" are in college or beyond. You're still growing as a writer, don't just give up now.
Practice helps one to improve. Giving up leads no where.
Elizabeth aka Falcon-Rider
PS - I like to think I have improved greatly since I started posting fics on I have been on since before I started HS, I am now a senior in HS. I like to think my fics show my growth as a writer.
Anyway, have a good day, and DON'T STOP WRITING!
12/11/2004 c4 5Nejidragon
...Please don't stop the story! THIS IS A REALLY GOOD ONE! So what if one person didn't like it? So what if it isn't the best story out there? Did you have fun writing it? Did you like writing? Do you enjoy getting good reviews? Just because one person doesn't like the style you write in isn't a very good reason to discontinue your story! With me, if I can make one person happy with my story, i'm satisfied.
If that person doesn't like your story, they don't have to read it, but I for one want to know where this story is going.It's only three chapters in. You have plenty of time to develop your characters. If you think it'll help, get a beta reader! I'll do it! just don't give up! i want to know how the story ends! *puppy dog eyes*
Plus, that was more of a constructive critisism. They were telling you how to improve. That's why I think you should get a beta reader. They could give you suggestions and help to improve on your writing. You say that you have no talent, yet you do nothing about improving! You say that you're going to give up! It took me a while ot get halfway decent at writing, and I still think that the chapters I turn out are crap. Do I care? No, because my reviewers are telling me that they like it, and that they want me to write more.
Realize that you can't please everyone on ff. You will occasionally get constructive critisisms. You should read what the people have to say, and then continue writing with those suggestions in mind. Please don't give up!
5Nejidragon...Please don't stop the story! THIS IS A REALLY GOOD ONE! So what if one person didn't like it? So what if it isn't the best story out there? Did you have fun writing it? Did you like writing? Do you enjoy getting good reviews? Just because one person doesn't like the style you write in isn't a very good reason to discontinue your story! With me, if I can make one person happy with my story, i'm satisfied.
If that person doesn't like your story, they don't have to read it, but I for one want to know where this story is going.It's only three chapters in. You have plenty of time to develop your characters. If you think it'll help, get a beta reader! I'll do it! just don't give up! i want to know how the story ends! *puppy dog eyes*
Plus, that was more of a constructive critisism. They were telling you how to improve. That's why I think you should get a beta reader. They could give you suggestions and help to improve on your writing. You say that you have no talent, yet you do nothing about improving! You say that you're going to give up! It took me a while ot get halfway decent at writing, and I still think that the chapters I turn out are crap. Do I care? No, because my reviewers are telling me that they like it, and that they want me to write more.
Realize that you can't please everyone on ff. You will occasionally get constructive critisisms. You should read what the people have to say, and then continue writing with those suggestions in mind. Please don't give up!
12/11/2004 c4 kazoua
That's sad... I actually liked this story to some extent. It may not be the best, but at least it had some form of plot and cause, even if it was vauge. Aww, well. Just to say, if you just redo this story, expanded it some more, put more detail and feelings into it, this could be a really good fic.
And if you don't know the characters very well, you could just go and read the manga off a website. There's 242 chapters translated into english by now, and they are really easily and quickly downloaded.
That's sad... I actually liked this story to some extent. It may not be the best, but at least it had some form of plot and cause, even if it was vauge. Aww, well. Just to say, if you just redo this story, expanded it some more, put more detail and feelings into it, this could be a really good fic.
And if you don't know the characters very well, you could just go and read the manga off a website. There's 242 chapters translated into english by now, and they are really easily and quickly downloaded.