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2/25/2016 c10 3The Richmaster
This was a pretty interesting story; I liked the idea behind it
10/7/2011 c5 1akibara
oh nabikis story is so tragic, shes obviously only doing it for her family.

Nabiki canonically would have sold the dojo to mess around, and has frequently only shown greedy behavior at the expense of everyone including her family. What I can NEVER fucking understand are RA/NA idiots who somehow paint her as sympathetic, who pretend she doesn't have these horrible flaws, who somehow get the idea shes not worse thank the other fiancees after exploiting them time and again in the worst ways just to pay for snacks and whatever else.

I skipped nearly this whole chapter because I can't bear to read this drivel. The only kindness nabiki has ever displayed is for her mother. that's it. In the whole series, and then suddenly, after everything she did in the past including the wedding, she suddenly gives a shit, no, she would sell Ranma out at the best opportunity. Even Enaka would be closer and more likely to do all the things Nabiki is doing than herself. Akane always backs ranma, they fight, bicker, and make up but through it all, episodes of the manga Akane has Ranma's back 20 to 1. She almost always supports him in any endeavor he does and if something like your manga happened it would be no exception, Enaka IS Akane of the manga, and so even on THAT level, she is kind enough.
5/3/2011 c10 3tuatara
I have tried really hard to like your stories, especially this one. Honestly. But every one of them leaves me cold. I'm sure it has at least something to do with the fixation on an interpretation of Nabiki that lacks any support whatsoever in canon and is entirely composed of (befuddlingly common) fanon-fueled wishful thinking about an Ice Queen with a Heart of Gold. Yeah, that's part of it, but it's not the only thing. Take this story, for example. So many moving parts (too many, really) and so many interesting ideas that come to practically nothing. As you yourself basically admitted, all the complexity at work in this story results in...not much of anything at all. I mean, other than providing more opportunities to lavish attention on a version of Nabiki that exists nowhere but in the vast collective unconscious of fanfiction authors.

There's a ton of potential in these stories, which makes it all the more frustrating. I'm sorry that I can't say these stories were worth my time. I always hate giving such negative reviews.
3/12/2009 c1 13Ganheim
OOC likely.

[More like "absolutely everybody is so OOC that they might as well be original characters shoehorned into the names of the canon figures".]

The baka actually thought she

[Obligatory Japanese]

Their were times when a ray of light


as if she planned anything hentai

[Obligatory Japanese]

From What little she could


why he had never succumb in the past


In the past month alone Ranma had been subjected to a magical potion from Shampoo and a chemical one from Kodachi. Unfortunately or perhaps fortunately they were given within hours of each other.

[A few issues with this. The first is that by saying ‘in the past month’ this strongly implies that there is a time separation: a long time. If you’d said ‘then one day’ you’d have your nebulous time specifier without the problem of the connotation of a long time since it happened. ‘in the past month’ also carries a connotation of being spread through the month, which contradicts ‘they were given within hours of each other’. Kodachi’s used potions and drugs repeatedly; but Shampoo’s not known for them, her glaring character flaw is not trying the same failed plan over and over, but rushing ahead with a poorly-thought-out plan before giving proper consideration to the ramifications. Due to this, it’s overly OOC (to the point of contrived) for her to try this here. I’m not a fan of vilifying characters, there are ways to exploit character flaws to accomplish your story goals without straining them into OOC.]


[Obligatory Japanese]

"Here ya go."

[Doesn’t really match Kasumi’s speech patterns]

Although the technical flaws are relatively few, there's also very little of staying true to the canon.
3/22/2007 c6 16Lerris
I thought I'd comment on this chapter since one reviewer decided to go off the deep end because the reviewer didn't approve of a section of three hundred sixty three words in a story of thirty six thousand words. Yes, I did read the book the reviewer is referring to, and yes that little bit is loosely based on a part in that book. Should I have added a mention? Maybe. Most likely I just forgot, but I have corrected that now.

At any rate, last I checked when we write we draw on a plethora of ideas from everything that has come before in our lives including things we have read before, and yes it is unavoidable for there to be similarities at times. That is simply the nature of reality, as there are only so many variations for some things. The reviewer went on to whine about the way I wrote that section which is a bit confusing to me since, had I made it extensive then that would have stepped into the area of copying, which is something I would not do. My only other realistic option would have been to invent a system from scratch which arguable would have been the best option for those three hundred plus words, but last I checked this still is fanfiction which by definition contains elements from preexisting works, although I do try to be consistently original and inventive.
3/22/2007 c6 7Shavaineth
*wince* this story had promise... up until this chapter. I know that to one extent or another some similarity between ideas is unavoidable but the discussion between Mrs Tendo and Ranma was a bit too much for me. The theory (what wasn't glossed over anyway) and the ordering of events left me feeling like this was practically a summary of the events between Talia and Kris from Mercedes Lackey's "Arrow's Flight" as he was helping her gain consious control of her gift. While I can appreciate borrowing the idea of grounding and centering and applying it in this case. At least try to find a different way of presenting it because this 'summary' form left a really sour taste in my mouth that is ultimately making it impossible for me to even consider finishing this story.
6/26/2006 c10 14Aquawyrm
Well, I think that the chaos will continue, things will go back to normal, and when it comes back and haunts them...well, that's normal, isn't it?

Besides, the best part of Ranma 1/2 is that there's all that opportunity for romance, and none of it ever comes into being because of the interference.
5/22/2006 c10 2Talantus
hey good story. i wonder if this is the end? if so, will you make a sequel? nothing much to say for this fics execpt that it held the road all along. maybe a little bit oc OCCness but nothing to fuss over about. all in all, a good fic that makes you want to read more ;)
5/20/2006 c10 Martrex
Great Stuff! will this new turn around mean that Akane will be much more open to Ranma and will their relationship advance quickly? she know's that he IS a good man (if not a little stupid at times).

Looking forward to more!
5/19/2006 c10 6Judaphine
in the end, the perfect punishment for the perverted pig. loved the story.
5/19/2006 c10 4Anon1000
I admit I was a bit disapointed the R and A's relationship that was developing on the side lines didn't develop as much as it di. But you're right, it wasn't developed enough at the end, and to force it prematurely just to satisfy people like me would just hurt the fic. You ended it well, leaving it open with the prospect of more.

I think my favorite thing about this fic is that Enaka behaves more like a fanonized Akane (extremely violent and psychotic), while the real Akane is much closer to the manga canon (sometimes violent, a bit impatient, but overall "a very sweet girl"). I'd say you were trying to say something about fanfiction, but I've been known to read into things too deeply.
5/18/2006 c10 goku90504
could you perhaps explain the neko ken as it is in this episode i just cant see the neko ken as a poisen maybe a demonic possesion or the spirits of the cats possesing him or even a split personailty but the way it acted in this one definately was not a demon and the others i cant see the harm in intagrateing with it beyond adding a bit of feline to his personailty and thats not so dangerous
5/18/2006 c1 4Firebird2083
Incredibly good story. I look forward to a sequel.
5/18/2006 c10 38Innortal
Set up pretty well for another book. Looking good, and waiting for more.
5/18/2006 c10 9Dragon Man 180
I'm glad the real Akane is free! There will be some changes now! I'm eager to see how Akane improves with Ranma teaching her!
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