for The Legend of ChantriBova3/2/2005 c5 
5Stellar Raven
Oh...tantalizing flash-forward at the beginning. You are evil. This chapter was much more linear, and I found it a lot easier to read. The last one seemed to jump around a lot, I had to re-read it a few times before I was sure what was going on. I like that you're already alluding to a backstory for the mentor. I swear, on the show it always seemed like they were making up Zordon's as they went.
The footsoldiers are intriguing, and I like the powers Antoinette uses. They seem to be elemental, which isn't exactly a new idea as Ranger fics go, but they don't appear to correlate in any way to her Ranger color, which is a nice change.
I have the taste of quicksand-sludge in my mouth now, and it's all your fault. Ugh.
5Stellar RavenOh...tantalizing flash-forward at the beginning. You are evil. This chapter was much more linear, and I found it a lot easier to read. The last one seemed to jump around a lot, I had to re-read it a few times before I was sure what was going on. I like that you're already alluding to a backstory for the mentor. I swear, on the show it always seemed like they were making up Zordon's as they went.
The footsoldiers are intriguing, and I like the powers Antoinette uses. They seem to be elemental, which isn't exactly a new idea as Ranger fics go, but they don't appear to correlate in any way to her Ranger color, which is a nice change.
I have the taste of quicksand-sludge in my mouth now, and it's all your fault. Ugh.
3/2/2005 c4 Stellar Raven
Did you write this chapter...backwards? (shakes head) Okay...the formatting makes this a little hard to read, but I'm still intrigued by the plot and amused by the characters.I meant to get around to reading this sooner...Sorry about that.
Oh, and caste means a social class. Cast is what you put on a leg. :P
Did you write this chapter...backwards? (shakes head) Okay...the formatting makes this a little hard to read, but I'm still intrigued by the plot and amused by the characters.I meant to get around to reading this sooner...Sorry about that.
Oh, and caste means a social class. Cast is what you put on a leg. :P
1/17/2005 c3 Stellar Raven
Told you I'd read it! Ha!
This is shaping up to be a pretty good story. I especially love the intro...I think it's every PR fan's dream to be chosen to play a Ranger out of nowhere like that. Very cool. I like the formatting, and the characters seem pretty cool so far, for all that I've only really known them for one chapter. You're getting off to a slow start, but keeping a decent level of mystery going, which I must say is a very effective hook. I can't wait to read more.
I was almost expecting the main character to get stuck with Yellow, because black female Power Rangers always do. Thank you for breaking that stereotype. Eerie coincidence...the Black Ranger in my story is only Black because she got cheated out of Blue.
Okay, now the negative...There's one part of the story, when Antoinette is entering the classroom and sitting down, where you jump from past to present tense and back a few times. Big nono. And the word 'Peel', means to strip off a layer of something, as in to peel a banana, or to peel someone's face off. The word 'Peal' is used to describe the noise a bell makes, or a thunderclap.
Sorry. I tend to do things like that. But you should probably take it as a compliment that out of three chapters, those are the only mistakes I could find.
Adding you to Author Alert now. Looking forward to more.
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Told you I'd read it! Ha!
This is shaping up to be a pretty good story. I especially love the intro...I think it's every PR fan's dream to be chosen to play a Ranger out of nowhere like that. Very cool. I like the formatting, and the characters seem pretty cool so far, for all that I've only really known them for one chapter. You're getting off to a slow start, but keeping a decent level of mystery going, which I must say is a very effective hook. I can't wait to read more.
I was almost expecting the main character to get stuck with Yellow, because black female Power Rangers always do. Thank you for breaking that stereotype. Eerie coincidence...the Black Ranger in my story is only Black because she got cheated out of Blue.
Okay, now the negative...There's one part of the story, when Antoinette is entering the classroom and sitting down, where you jump from past to present tense and back a few times. Big nono. And the word 'Peel', means to strip off a layer of something, as in to peel a banana, or to peel someone's face off. The word 'Peal' is used to describe the noise a bell makes, or a thunderclap.
Sorry. I tend to do things like that. But you should probably take it as a compliment that out of three chapters, those are the only mistakes I could find.
Adding you to Author Alert now. Looking forward to more.
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1/5/2005 c1 NISAA
Good Start. I can't wait to read the next chapter. I can't believe you finally posted it!
Good Start. I can't wait to read the next chapter. I can't believe you finally posted it!