for Lost in Middle Earth12/23/2012 c38 
163Marcus S. Lazarus
The writing style’s a bit basic at times, and the characters sometimes say more than they really need to- as well as characters like Legolas sounding a bit more petulant or a bit less formal than they should, considering their backgrounds; I can’t see him saying ‘Well, actually’ as an obvious example-, but the general plot is definitely well-handled, to say the least.
The opening circumstances that led to them arriving in Middle-Earth are simple, but effective- Hermione’s certainly the type to experiment with something like that, and it’s not that implausible that other worlds could be out there once you know what to look for-, and subsequent developments such as Harry’s use of a Patronus against the Black Riders generally work (Although a few changes, such as the Ringwraiths NEVER managing to catch Frodo as he fled to Rivendell, would have improved the story somewhat).
However, it’s in the personal interaction that you really shine; the bond between Harry and Aragorn, as two people burdened by a destiny they feel incapable of shouldering even as they are resolved to do what good they can, certainly works, to say nothing of Fred, George, Merry and Pippin’s subsequent friendship even before their shared captivity, and Hermione’s efforts to ‘step up’ as she becomes one of the main heroes rather than essentially serving as Harry’s ‘database’ (She might have always been willing to get involved, but when you get down to it Harry was always in the thick of the action where Hermione was on the sidelines).
You could have made more changes when exploring how the Gryffindors’ arrival affected some events- such as Harry’s decoy actually making a difference-, but the character interaction you came up with generally worked, particularly with your decision to send HERMIONE with Frodo and Sam rather than take the ‘obvious’ route of having Harry go with them, as well as Ron participating in Legolas and Gimli’s ‘contest’ and Ginny’s talk with Frodo about their mutual experiences with being controlled by something dark.
Besides, at least Hermione got a chance to shine in the final confrontation; Ginny taking Merry’s moment of glory slightly sucked for him, but Hermione’s part in the final battle of Mount Doom was DEFINITELY worth reading.
And as for the conclusion...
They might not have been able to save anyone in the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, but there’s still some interesting potential for the future, to say the least.
163Marcus S. LazarusThe writing style’s a bit basic at times, and the characters sometimes say more than they really need to- as well as characters like Legolas sounding a bit more petulant or a bit less formal than they should, considering their backgrounds; I can’t see him saying ‘Well, actually’ as an obvious example-, but the general plot is definitely well-handled, to say the least.
The opening circumstances that led to them arriving in Middle-Earth are simple, but effective- Hermione’s certainly the type to experiment with something like that, and it’s not that implausible that other worlds could be out there once you know what to look for-, and subsequent developments such as Harry’s use of a Patronus against the Black Riders generally work (Although a few changes, such as the Ringwraiths NEVER managing to catch Frodo as he fled to Rivendell, would have improved the story somewhat).
However, it’s in the personal interaction that you really shine; the bond between Harry and Aragorn, as two people burdened by a destiny they feel incapable of shouldering even as they are resolved to do what good they can, certainly works, to say nothing of Fred, George, Merry and Pippin’s subsequent friendship even before their shared captivity, and Hermione’s efforts to ‘step up’ as she becomes one of the main heroes rather than essentially serving as Harry’s ‘database’ (She might have always been willing to get involved, but when you get down to it Harry was always in the thick of the action where Hermione was on the sidelines).
You could have made more changes when exploring how the Gryffindors’ arrival affected some events- such as Harry’s decoy actually making a difference-, but the character interaction you came up with generally worked, particularly with your decision to send HERMIONE with Frodo and Sam rather than take the ‘obvious’ route of having Harry go with them, as well as Ron participating in Legolas and Gimli’s ‘contest’ and Ginny’s talk with Frodo about their mutual experiences with being controlled by something dark.
Besides, at least Hermione got a chance to shine in the final confrontation; Ginny taking Merry’s moment of glory slightly sucked for him, but Hermione’s part in the final battle of Mount Doom was DEFINITELY worth reading.
And as for the conclusion...
They might not have been able to save anyone in the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, but there’s still some interesting potential for the future, to say the least.
12/11/2012 c33 2pottermania bis
oh oh Ginny is not in a good place there! I'm really liking this story!
2pottermania bisoh oh Ginny is not in a good place there! I'm really liking this story!
12/11/2012 c26 pottermania bis
I think they all need laughter in this dark times and the four are quite hilarious!
I think they all need laughter in this dark times and the four are quite hilarious!
12/11/2012 c21 pottermania bis
We are finally in the Helms deep battle and you made good uses of Ron's strategic mind.
We are finally in the Helms deep battle and you made good uses of Ron's strategic mind.
12/11/2012 c12 pottermania bis
I think it's a good thing that Hermione went with Frodo and Sam; she is not a fighter and will be more useful with them than in Rohan fighting. Congratulations for your story, you are a good writer and I really like this story!
I think it's a good thing that Hermione went with Frodo and Sam; she is not a fighter and will be more useful with them than in Rohan fighting. Congratulations for your story, you are a good writer and I really like this story!
12/11/2012 c11 pottermania bis
Harry has Godric's sword with him and we are now certain that the ring wants something from him. The fellowship is broken and I wonder where are Ron and Ginny. I thing Ginny is at Edoras with Eowyn but I dont know for Ron, maybe Gondor?
Harry has Godric's sword with him and we are now certain that the ring wants something from him. The fellowship is broken and I wonder where are Ron and Ginny. I thing Ginny is at Edoras with Eowyn but I dont know for Ron, maybe Gondor?
12/11/2012 c7 pottermania bis
Another adventure for Harry and the others. I wonder why he had such a pull with the ring whereas the Hermione and the twins does not
Another adventure for Harry and the others. I wonder why he had such a pull with the ring whereas the Hermione and the twins does not
12/11/2012 c4 pottermania bis
Fred and George are always there to lighten the mood. Now only Hermione, Ron and Ginny are missing!
Fred and George are always there to lighten the mood. Now only Hermione, Ron and Ginny are missing!
12/11/2012 c3 pottermania bis
I really like this story thus far. Harry's magic make things easier for Frodo and the others.
I really like this story thus far. Harry's magic make things easier for Frodo and the others.
12/11/2012 c1 pottermania bis
This first chapter looks quite promising. I recently stlmbled upon crossovers between Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter and I fell in love with it!
This first chapter looks quite promising. I recently stlmbled upon crossovers between Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter and I fell in love with it!
8/24/2012 c8 Too lazy to Logn
Seriously there's a freaking Balrog, a demon, inside the Mines but noooo! I'm not going to tell anybody! Cause I don't want to worryyyyy themmmm.
Seriously there's a freaking Balrog, a demon, inside the Mines but noooo! I'm not going to tell anybody! Cause I don't want to worryyyyy themmmm.
5/9/2012 c9 question
why not have fred and george apperate?
why not have fred and george apperate?
4/15/2012 c9 lil stoner
wheres the spells man, dozens and dozens of spells that could be used. transfiguration, dude
wheres the spells man, dozens and dozens of spells that could be used. transfiguration, dude