for When angels deserve to die4/16/2005 c1 Drop it like it's SCORCHING
Nice beginning. Why dont you update? i've been waiting weeks for the next chapter. Well, anyways this character darren faced his father's killer a bit too nicely. I dont know if he is very forgiving or if he just has a problem. Yah sure he was just put up to it but he had the choice of not killing. A little suggestion change the begining a little bit by putting some rage into this darren character. So farhe just seems like an angel who DOESNT deserve to die
Nice beginning. Why dont you update? i've been waiting weeks for the next chapter. Well, anyways this character darren faced his father's killer a bit too nicely. I dont know if he is very forgiving or if he just has a problem. Yah sure he was just put up to it but he had the choice of not killing. A little suggestion change the begining a little bit by putting some rage into this darren character. So farhe just seems like an angel who DOESNT deserve to die
3/28/2005 c1 
4Remir'wrath
Very nicely started my freind. Much better than your version in your notebook. It's nice to see that you took my advice and diddnt become redundant with the begining of your sentences. I'll look out for the rest. I really like your line ex. "..give them a piece of his mind...or the point of his waghnakh." that was a nice touch
4Remir'wrathVery nicely started my freind. Much better than your version in your notebook. It's nice to see that you took my advice and diddnt become redundant with the begining of your sentences. I'll look out for the rest. I really like your line ex. "..give them a piece of his mind...or the point of his waghnakh." that was a nice touch
3/24/2005 c1 1Hirvegil Gilraen
You should really lengthen your chapters. But then, this story had a lot of vivid descriptions. Keep up the good work.
1Hirvegil GilraenYou should really lengthen your chapters. But then, this story had a lot of vivid descriptions. Keep up the good work.