Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for T'Mar

4/23/2011 c1 178Susan M. M
Nice beginning. Yes, it does show signs of being an early work. Chapter 2 is a bit rushed, with especially the conversation with Spock and T'Mar. That would work better once they've gotten to know each other better. Alas, plot bunnies are many: time to write and complete stories is limited. Finish your other stories first, and then as your writing continues to improve, come back to this one when you have the time and skill to do it justice.
5/8/2005 c1 4th6thDoc
Great story idea, but a bit too succinct. Adding more detail might be nice. You said it does NOT follow the book or books, yet it ties in with the excellent Vulcan Academy Murders. Which is it?

Got good potential, I'll keep my eye out for more.
4/26/2005 c1 22KarraCaz
Two very short chapters which don't really explain much about your story or where it's going. Another thing, I don't believe that a properly brought up Vulcan girl would ask such a direct question about Spock's private life. This is a very personal matter, I think, and one that doesn't have happy memories for Spock... unless you're planning to explain why T'Marr is so frank on such short acquaintance. :)
4/20/2005 c1 11galleena
hmm.. different and a bit short. Is there more to the story? It would be interesting to see what T'mar has to say about Spock wanting to marry her, perhaps you could write a sequel?

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service