for On the Brink1/16/2009 c1 
5Draygon-Icewing
This is a wonderful portrait of Wendy as she meets and gets to know Peter Pan. He is a thing of beauty, unnatural as it is, that can not be touched by mortal hands lest the spell holding his life together breaks.
A beautiful reasoning by the most reasonable of her siblings. And for her age, wise also.
5Draygon-IcewingThis is a wonderful portrait of Wendy as she meets and gets to know Peter Pan. He is a thing of beauty, unnatural as it is, that can not be touched by mortal hands lest the spell holding his life together breaks.
A beautiful reasoning by the most reasonable of her siblings. And for her age, wise also.
1/21/2008 c1 28Masamune Reforged
surprised i liked this, considering i have an absurd distaste for poetry... I think you do well in examining a more serious side of Wendy that is almost always neglected. Some of the words are... well, you know, a little too 'flowery'... but, well, show me a poem that isn't...
the best part was the contrast of Peter Pan as being both old and young. you did excellent work using descriptions to showcase this contrast. could have used more 'consideration' and introspection on Wendy's part.
this wasn't an easy task, i'm sure.
28Masamune Reforgedsurprised i liked this, considering i have an absurd distaste for poetry... I think you do well in examining a more serious side of Wendy that is almost always neglected. Some of the words are... well, you know, a little too 'flowery'... but, well, show me a poem that isn't...
the best part was the contrast of Peter Pan as being both old and young. you did excellent work using descriptions to showcase this contrast. could have used more 'consideration' and introspection on Wendy's part.
this wasn't an easy task, i'm sure.
2/25/2006 c1 sweetblood
I'm not one for poetry, but I do frequent this fandom and you are one of my favorite authors. I actually tracked this through your profile.
Your poetry isn't bad, but I'd have to say that your prose is better. Maybe you should try writing a Peter Pan fic in prose form. It'll be your first non-stepcest (I think). As it is, this is your first non M-rated fic.
Speaking of ratings, maybe you should bump this up to a T. If anything, ratings tend to dictate audience groups around here. There's nothing explicit, but it may be too much for the average 9-year-old to grasp. Some 13-year olds may be able to understand the poem. Just a suggestion.
I'm not one for poetry, but I do frequent this fandom and you are one of my favorite authors. I actually tracked this through your profile.
Your poetry isn't bad, but I'd have to say that your prose is better. Maybe you should try writing a Peter Pan fic in prose form. It'll be your first non-stepcest (I think). As it is, this is your first non M-rated fic.
Speaking of ratings, maybe you should bump this up to a T. If anything, ratings tend to dictate audience groups around here. There's nothing explicit, but it may be too much for the average 9-year-old to grasp. Some 13-year olds may be able to understand the poem. Just a suggestion.