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for One Too Many Planets

2/26/2006 c10 4eilien
Another great chapter, can't wait to read more!
2/25/2006 c9 BallsBreaker
I read this one of Helio.

It's a great fic, but I seriously suggest you re-write the ending into romance. After all the tension, the closeness and the love J&S have, the ending let's us down.
2/25/2006 c7 167 League Boots
Wow chapter! And really love how nice and long they are 'cause I can spend more time with these cool characters. Digging happily into Chap 8, but wanted to applaud your neat story here! Catching up now!
2/23/2006 c8 oneunforgiven
glad to see more chapters, how much time has passed since sam vanished? I re-read some but still couldn't get a time frame clear. I love how the story is changing, it is soo not what I expected!

Please keep the chapters coming!
2/23/2006 c8 5Kent Rigel
The incongruity of the words: 'cur dog' coming out of Sam's mouth is enough to make me laugh pretty damn hard. You're story is developing well. I look forward to furthur installments.
2/22/2006 c7 Kent Rigel
You really needed to add scene break indicators...

But that wasn't the only thing that made it confusing, the pace of the story seemed to speed up and then slow down constantly, making it hard to follow exactly where and to whom things were being said.

Also I find it hard to believe that Jack could have been on that planet for several days without Daniel spilling the beans or panicking. Certainly Hammond would have sent teams to recover him, assuming the worst.

Some of the character behavious was a little confusing, though I think you had Daniel put perfectly. I think Jack was never that much of a bastard... but thats my opinion.

However even though these little things exist an interesting story is unwinding here, keep writing it...
2/22/2006 c1 star trek chick
Now this is a god story! It almost reads like one of the episodes. 'Course there are some minor glitches like I find the scene transitions absent...totally. It's very confusing and should be edited to indicate some change of scene. And I don't think O'Neill would kiss a subordinate officer in a public event; after all he is second in command on the base so EVERYONE is subordinate to him and in the chain-of-command. Other than that I think your style is quite good. Looking forward to the next chapters
2/22/2006 c7 42ReganX
There was a small error at the beginning of this chapter - you promoted Sam to major then bumped her back to captain a bit later - but other than that it was fabulous.

I love the twist you included with having Sam amnesiac but that her captors have been treating her really well, rather than having her enslaved, married to an absolute jerk or something similarly unpleasant. There are far worse situations to be in than as the adopted daughter of a queen and I can see it making things far more difficult when a rescue arrives to find that she's happy where she is and doesn't want to leave.

Will we find out why the Queen decided to try to pass Sam off as her daughter and, presumably, her heir? Was she unable to have her own children or something, or does she genuinely believe that Sam is hers?

The exchange between Daniel and Teal'c over Jack's behaviour was perfect; especially Teal'c's line "We have never had the loss of Captain Carter before." It's easy to forget sometimes how insightful he is.

Glad to see that Jack's going back to the planet to find Sam. I expected no less.

Looking forward to reading the next chapter.
2/22/2006 c6 ReganX
Great chapter!

The tension between Sam and Jack, and the way that it spilled out into their professional interaction - although that was mostly on Jack's side - was really well captured.

Jack's going to feel like a real jerk for treating Sam the way he did now that she's missing.
2/22/2006 c5 ReganX
Loved Janet at the beginning of this chapter. I could picture her making the threat about unleashing a junior doctor on Jack.

I feel so sorry for Sam, though. Between withdrawal from the healing water and confusion over her feelings, she's having a bad time all around.

I loved the way Teal'c saw how upset Sam was and tried to comfort her. I'd have thought that Jack would be a little more sensitive, though. I understand that he might be angry with her, but he's being really hard on her. Threatening to spank her was hardly the best way to deal with the situation, but then again, it's early days for them both and they've been through a rough time so I can see Jack being harsher with her than he would have otherwise.

The interactions between all characters in this chapter were really well written.
2/22/2006 c4 ReganX
Another stellar chapter.

Having Sam's brother go through drug addiction and withdrawal was a nice touch.

I felt really bad for both Sam and Jack in this part; for her because I know how much seeing him suffer would hurt her and for him because of the pain he was enduring and because he felt that he had to send away the only person he had there to support him to preserve his dignity.

Somehow I doubt that Sam is over the effects of the healing water so quickly. If it's anything like the sarcophagus, being healthy when you use it would make it more addictive than using it when you're sick.
2/22/2006 c3 ReganX
If I didn't already love Ragnar, I would now.

I loved the way that she stood up to Jack when he tried to chew poor Sam out and her description of Sam's devotion to him and to taking care of him was fabulous. I could picture her trying to help a Jack who was determined not to accept help.

Ragnar's question about whether he would be acting any differently if Sam had been the one injured and Jack's response were perfect. I liked seeing his protective side shine through.

The part about the Shaman, and the Tilan used in the sarcophagi was fascinating. The prospect of withdrawal from the holy water makes a lot of sense, but poor Sam is definitely going to have her hands full. If she thought sick Jack was bad, withdrawal Jack will be far worse.
2/22/2006 c2 ReganX
Ragnar makes Janet look positively tame. Her bedside manner might leave somethig to be desired, but that's probably the only way to get Jack to cooperate. Her threatening Jack with her walking stick was funny.

I hope Jack stops being so hard on Sam, though. She only wants to help.
2/22/2006 c1 ReganX
Wonderful beginning. I love stories set in the early days of the team and I love the way you've handled the Season One characterizations of both Sam and Jack. You've really captured Jac's early snarkiness and tough guy routine and Sam's insecurities and eagerness to impress - understandable, given that she is the only member of SG-1 that Jack didn't want on the team at first.

Nice job with the action description and your character Ragnar is great. Somehow I doubt that she will have any problems dealing with Jack, even at his grumpiest.
2/22/2006 c7 1Trinitystargazer3
Great chapter. I'm definetly intreeged. I'm having a little trouble with the passage of time. Its' a little confussing, there's no noticeable breaks. :)
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