for When Destiny Calls3/7/2016 c33 Alice
Please :( update this story... I like it :( I'm curious to know the Zephon'n son. Please, pleaseee! Update :'''( /3
Please :( update this story... I like it :( I'm curious to know the Zephon'n son. Please, pleaseee! Update :'''( /3
8/20/2014 c1 nettie
I read this story and raziel history, i like it!, hopefully you can continue them soon.
I read this story and raziel history, i like it!, hopefully you can continue them soon.
11/15/2012 c33 
6residentkilla
AMAZING!
Man I wish we could have a "recommended authors" section. You for sure would be at the top. ;D
6residentkillaAMAZING!
Man I wish we could have a "recommended authors" section. You for sure would be at the top. ;D
7/10/2012 c33 25grisabele
Oh wow. I hadn't read this in so long I had to re-read the whole thing. Still like it!
25grisabeleOh wow. I hadn't read this in so long I had to re-read the whole thing. Still like it!
7/9/2012 c33 Guest
Great story. Just a few grammar problems. You use "I seen..." alot. The correct usage would be "I saw him rob the bank..." If you want to use the word "seen" it should be like this "I have seen him. Yesterday, I think." or something similar.
Great story. Just a few grammar problems. You use "I seen..." alot. The correct usage would be "I saw him rob the bank..." If you want to use the word "seen" it should be like this "I have seen him. Yesterday, I think." or something similar.
7/8/2012 c33 Guest
A very good new chappy, my friend. Glad Zephon's back home, the pregnancy was a good twist. And Zephon warming up to a human child at the end was not something I expected lol. Keep up the great work Lil' V! ;D
Grim
A very good new chappy, my friend. Glad Zephon's back home, the pregnancy was a good twist. And Zephon warming up to a human child at the end was not something I expected lol. Keep up the great work Lil' V! ;D
Grim
7/8/2012 c33 7Dragon Ma'am
glad to have you back on the scene, littlevamp. hmm wonder how Regina got preggers...
7Dragon Ma'amglad to have you back on the scene, littlevamp. hmm wonder how Regina got preggers...
7/8/2012 c33 2Azura Soul Reaver
Maybe the reason she got pregnant would be her dark gift as it manifests differently in everyone. Still it is pretty interesting! I am glad that you updated!
2Azura Soul ReaverMaybe the reason she got pregnant would be her dark gift as it manifests differently in everyone. Still it is pretty interesting! I am glad that you updated!
5/4/2010 c32 8The Grim Reeper
Ohh! I so can't wait for the next chapter! Don't keep me waiting long, kay? :D Can guess what's coming, but looking foward to reading it.
8The Grim ReeperOhh! I so can't wait for the next chapter! Don't keep me waiting long, kay? :D Can guess what's coming, but looking foward to reading it.
3/5/2010 c1 17Funky Tanuki
... There are a ton of tings wrong with this, so I probably won't be able to cover it all.
site=sight
The first paragraph, which is really a giant block of unformatted text, simply throws a ton of information out at once. That's pretty much a no-no. "Mother" and "father" don't need to be capitalized. Usually with numbers, anything twenty five and under are spelled out, but that can easily fall under preference so it's nothing major.
scums=scum
That's it for my perusing. I'll try to read and point out more periodically.
17Funky Tanuki... There are a ton of tings wrong with this, so I probably won't be able to cover it all.
site=sight
The first paragraph, which is really a giant block of unformatted text, simply throws a ton of information out at once. That's pretty much a no-no. "Mother" and "father" don't need to be capitalized. Usually with numbers, anything twenty five and under are spelled out, but that can easily fall under preference so it's nothing major.
scums=scum
That's it for my perusing. I'll try to read and point out more periodically.
9/28/2009 c7 1Anarchived
Wow this is good! This story is as addicting as crack! Not that I would know, but it's super addicting! haha I love how it's a Zephon story, which is very rare, and how Raziel's in it, too! Your character is spunky and not the typical heroine! I love it!
1AnarchivedWow this is good! This story is as addicting as crack! Not that I would know, but it's super addicting! haha I love how it's a Zephon story, which is very rare, and how Raziel's in it, too! Your character is spunky and not the typical heroine! I love it!
8/1/2009 c1 7Dragon Ma'am
not to rush you or anything, but when's the next chapter? I'm anxious to know what happens.
7Dragon Ma'amnot to rush you or anything, but when's the next chapter? I'm anxious to know what happens.
2/11/2009 c20 1TammyBee
Ok I'm going to give you some crit here, when you have a character talk you give the response or expression of the 2nd person directly after the inverted commas. This is incorrect and extremely confusing. In English principle the speakers espression occurs directly after the speech, for example:
"I do not know what you are talking about" she said in a sly tone.
You must add the expression or response of the person who has spoken, not the person being spoken to.
Hope this helps :)
1TammyBeeOk I'm going to give you some crit here, when you have a character talk you give the response or expression of the 2nd person directly after the inverted commas. This is incorrect and extremely confusing. In English principle the speakers espression occurs directly after the speech, for example:
"I do not know what you are talking about" she said in a sly tone.
You must add the expression or response of the person who has spoken, not the person being spoken to.
Hope this helps :)