
5/6/2009 c28 dani
I absolutely love this story! please please please update soon!
I absolutely love this story! please please please update soon!
1/12/2009 c28 TheDivaDivine
This hurts me to say this...it hurts a lot actually. I did not like this chapter. You indicated that you did not know much about what goes on in a court room and it showed when writing this piece. I cannot however give you a break in my opinion of this chapter because you are 20 years old and you take your writing seriously. My suggestion would have been to research simple court room procedure or read the POA. Read the part where Harry had to go to court for blowing up his aunt. It would have given you some idea about handling wizard hearings. Braton needed to have a Defense attorney as well as there needed to be a prosecuting attorney. The prosecuting attorney needed to prove that Braton deliberately tried to kill his father for trying to hurt the girl that he loves. At the same time the Defense attorney needed to prove that Braton's case was self defense. There needed to be cross examination of the evidence also. It all these elements were added to this chapter it would have been longer true but it would have been much more exciting to read. Life problems are not resolved this easily with a ribbon bow attached like the hearing that you wrote. You know I love this story but I had to tell you the truth about this chapter.
This hurts me to say this...it hurts a lot actually. I did not like this chapter. You indicated that you did not know much about what goes on in a court room and it showed when writing this piece. I cannot however give you a break in my opinion of this chapter because you are 20 years old and you take your writing seriously. My suggestion would have been to research simple court room procedure or read the POA. Read the part where Harry had to go to court for blowing up his aunt. It would have given you some idea about handling wizard hearings. Braton needed to have a Defense attorney as well as there needed to be a prosecuting attorney. The prosecuting attorney needed to prove that Braton deliberately tried to kill his father for trying to hurt the girl that he loves. At the same time the Defense attorney needed to prove that Braton's case was self defense. There needed to be cross examination of the evidence also. It all these elements were added to this chapter it would have been longer true but it would have been much more exciting to read. Life problems are not resolved this easily with a ribbon bow attached like the hearing that you wrote. You know I love this story but I had to tell you the truth about this chapter.
1/12/2009 c28 rbt1980
1st , I felt the Chapter was to short . The trial should of had more drama in it .
2nd , I think Hermione should of told Braton to call her Mom .
3rd the Court should not appointed a Legal guardian for Braton?
4th what about Braton and Bonnie Schooling ?
1st , I felt the Chapter was to short . The trial should of had more drama in it .
2nd , I think Hermione should of told Braton to call her Mom .
3rd the Court should not appointed a Legal guardian for Braton?
4th what about Braton and Bonnie Schooling ?
1/11/2009 c28
9Ape Regina 1993
Great Chapter!
It was a great addition to the over all story and I really hope you continue soon!

Great Chapter!
It was a great addition to the over all story and I really hope you continue soon!
1/7/2009 c27
1Krit.16
hey! Im glad you got around to updating! Great chapter, it could have been a bit longer...maybe have hermione talk to Braton. Still, its great the way it is! I can't wait to see what happens, update soon!
-Krystal

hey! Im glad you got around to updating! Great chapter, it could have been a bit longer...maybe have hermione talk to Braton. Still, its great the way it is! I can't wait to see what happens, update soon!
-Krystal
1/7/2009 c27 rbt1980
I think th whle sex talk chapter was not needed , 1st I would not think Bonnie was a virgin As i sated before I felt that Draco would of raped Bonnie , seeing that rape has to do with power not sex . It would be logical that Draco would of been raping her . Plues it fit into the chapter where Braton has the wet dream .
I think th whle sex talk chapter was not needed , 1st I would not think Bonnie was a virgin As i sated before I felt that Draco would of raped Bonnie , seeing that rape has to do with power not sex . It would be logical that Draco would of been raping her . Plues it fit into the chapter where Braton has the wet dream .
1/7/2009 c25 rbt1980
Are we ever going to find out everything that Draco did to Bonnie? Was the guy who took dance in on the kidnaping ?
Are we ever going to find out everything that Draco did to Bonnie? Was the guy who took dance in on the kidnaping ?
1/7/2009 c24 rbt1980
Braton having wet dreams about Bonnie ? If he was why could he not see her face .
Braton having wet dreams about Bonnie ? If he was why could he not see her face .
1/7/2009 c23 rbt1980
1st why did they not take Bonnie to St. Mungo’s ? She is hurt and wuld need a doctor ? 2nd would they not take Braton in for questioning , not send him right off to Azkaban. Why could not the Weasley take him in , they have 8 kids , what is one more ?
1st why did they not take Bonnie to St. Mungo’s ? She is hurt and wuld need a doctor ? 2nd would they not take Braton in for questioning , not send him right off to Azkaban. Why could not the Weasley take him in , they have 8 kids , what is one more ?
1/7/2009 c22 rbt1980
I do not get it Draco has stripped , beaten , cut , and whipped Bonnie . How could she still have a bra ? Even if she did still have the bra , why would she of put it on ? I think Braton should of brought her some cloth to put on .
I do not get it Draco has stripped , beaten , cut , and whipped Bonnie . How could she still have a bra ? Even if she did still have the bra , why would she of put it on ? I think Braton should of brought her some cloth to put on .
1/7/2009 c20 rbt1980
Should Draco not of filmed Bonnie being both whipped and beaten ? That would of hurt Ron and Hermione even more .
Should Draco not of filmed Bonnie being both whipped and beaten ? That would of hurt Ron and Hermione even more .
1/7/2009 c19 rbt1980
I understand why Draco would cut and whip Bonnie . But would he also not of raped her too ? If hed did not why not ?
I understand why Draco would cut and whip Bonnie . But would he also not of raped her too ? If hed did not why not ?