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7/17/2007 c5 8Mr.Who2123
Nice fight scene...that's pretty much it. On to the next one!

Mr.Who2123
7/17/2007 c4 Mr.Who2123
Wow, that was a good chapter! So Zelos AND Kratos join. That's pretty awesome! Great chapter. On to the next one!

Mr.Who2123
7/17/2007 c3 Mr.Who2123
Yay! Zelos is a good guy! -dances- I always thought it was kinda dumb how he just 'got tired of living' and dies if you pick Kratos. This, however, is a good alternative! On to the next chapter!

Mr.Who2123
7/17/2007 c2 Mr.Who2123
Wait, so Zelos was actually on the good side and was trying to get rid of Martel? Hm, very very interesting! I also want to know what Zelos wants! This is very good! On to the next one!

Mr.Who2123
7/17/2007 c1 Mr.Who2123
Hm, this is very interesting so far...Alaia Skyhawk said this was good, so I decided to check it out. The only CC I can really give is to describe more...such as the battle, instead of Lloyd just keep slashing at Zelos, have something like: "And then Lloyd thrust his sword vertically on Zelos, but the traitor threw up his shield just tin time to block the attack." It gives a little more description, and (to me)more suspense.

Well, now that the CC is out of the way(never like doing it.) I would like to say that the plot of the story is very good! I'm very curious as to Zelos' motives. Time for the next one!

Mr.Who2123

Oh, I put this on alerts! :D
5/6/2007 c1 11Drew L
I'm not even going to bother to continue reading this after the fact that you had Lloyd and the others lose to Zelos. Part of the point of that part of the game was that Zelos had underestimated their strength and after his humbling, his true (good) colors came out. This story would have gone over much better if you'd simply had them fight him to submission, then chose to spare him, but since you seem to hellbent on underminding all the other characters' strengths, I have to give this story a definite 0/10.
4/20/2007 c12 5Aiwethryne
Yeah, since you got out of the hole, you should delete that chapter you wrote you were out of ideas. So, I'm glad you proceeded. :D
4/20/2007 c10 Aiwethryne
Why the decision to resurrect her NOW? Sheesh, Yuan.
4/20/2007 c9 Aiwethryne
Wow, this was way longer than the other chaps.
4/20/2007 c8 Aiwethryne
Oh, please. Something other than 'asked' now. You put asked quite a lot, and it's kinda ticking me. But, still good.
4/20/2007 c7 Aiwethryne
Why was it bolded...?
4/20/2007 c5 Aiwethryne
Oh, this is what I was going to say... I hate the word said. Good thing you put things other than 'said' in this chap.

Uh, well. Yggdrasill is spelled with 2 Ls. Different from the name of the tree at the center of the world according to Norse mythology (which is Yggdrasil), okay? I just wanted to point that out.
4/20/2007 c3 Aiwethryne
... ... ... ... ...(-cough-) Well, that was interesting... Hm, I was about to say something that I think was kinda important... (shrug) Guess I forgot... I hate my bad memory.
4/20/2007 c2 Aiwethryne
Heh heh heh heh heh...
4/20/2007 c1 Aiwethryne
Uh... That was rather quick... he left...
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