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5/7/2007 c1 8Califaction
Overall, I loved it-you're a great writer, and your description of the moment had me shivering. I haven't seen the moment and repercussions of Quirrel's death done as well as this, and admit that I often wished someone would do it justice. Your sensory imagery is fantastic, and so is your use of italics, but it did get a little bit repetetive toward the end-I think a larger, more specific vocabulary with regards to Quirrel's body will fix this, ie, cheek bones/forehead/chin/lips instead of just bones/skin. Was there any blood? I found myself wondering if there was-surely there must have been (I know the nose and forehead both bleed a lot when they're cut), but perhaps Harry's touch was so hot it evaporated or something. I like your description of fire=magic, and the way you led up to Quirrel's death with it-it was plausible, and it had continuity, and it was just like I imagine Harry would have done it, circling around the subject before immersing himself in it. I thought the 'ashes' comment in the very last section was a bit cliched, but adored the 'graveyard of ghosts' reference for its unknowingly literal application in book four, and was pleased with your description of Quirrel's good points and character. Harry's big "What if" question is IC, from what we know of him in canon-what if Voldemort hadn't killed his parents, what if Sirius had been cleared/hadn't died, what if Voldemort hadn't returned... You have managed to capture a different turning point in Harry's life that is rarely paid attention to.

Great job! Thank you!
5/6/2007 c1 S.P.M
That was great. I really liked it.
5/5/2007 c1 Vares
Well I must say that it was wonderfully written, also morbid enough to catch and hold the attention of most people.

While I cannot say anything about grammar mistakes I understand enough about construction of sentences and placing to appreciate the work that has been placed into this.

Of course I must also thank you for posting this for our viewing pleasures, so thank you.

As a finisher I must say good job on such a fine piece of fanfiction.
5/4/2007 c1 poof
some more brillaitn writing!
5/4/2007 c1 Snarky Lass
Very nicely done. Your work is all the more powerful in that it has been pared down to the essence of the matter, eliminating the superfluous melodrama, and allowing for a quite natural response to the aftermath of canon trauma.

I strongly suggest that you resist the urge to 'tinker' with this piece, and let it stand as written.
5/4/2007 c1 3pcp
Brilliant.
5/3/2007 c1 Kat
Woah! That was powerful! I'm still gasping from it. You have shown a real knack for getting under the skin and showing the scars. The only real critism I can offer is that it seems a bit more mature than an eleven year old, but then this eleven year old has already been through a lot more than most.

Very well written!

Kat
5/3/2007 c1 5Amerision
Excellent.

I've always wondered as well why everyone seemed to forget that Harry has killed.

Amerision
5/3/2007 c1 1Swimdraconian
An interesting spin on the events of Philosipher's Stone. Intriguing and well-written; nice job.
5/3/2007 c1 2Haikari Archersight
Very good! I liked it a lot. Quirrells death has always been sort of glossed over both in the books and in many fanfictions ive read and its nice to read a first year fic with Harry dealing with the aftermath of his own actions. The fire thing was a good touch.

Caught a spell check error...

and the spells that death had woven into his flash and blood.

Opps, lol.
5/3/2007 c1 Inconclusive
Beautifully executed. I'm in love with the little details you put into this that really made it come alive. This is the first good one-shot I've read in a long while.

*is off to check what else you've written now*
5/3/2007 c1 1Triptic Writer
Good story, I really liked it.

I think that it's the first time I see someone writing about Harry first kill, it's strange how everybody tend to forget about it.

So, congratulation for the idea and the execution is really good too. I particularly like the constant opposition between the fire with which he killed Quirrel and the cold that he is feeling.
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