for Tangled in Death1/3/2010 c9 Karnen
Ok I really like the story and what you have done. I just have one problem... When you did the whole "If Nanao was was mad then Naruto was ... F* HOMICIDAL" the difference in the words was enough. The cuss was out of place because it wasn't dialog, same with the capitals. It was completely unnecessary to capitalize and kind of ruined it for me. I recommend that you revise it to say that Naruto was "extremely homicidal" or something along those lines. a good writer doesn't add in what amounts to commentary to a story. Other than that, I think you're doing a good job with the story and would love to read more of it. As for the fight scenes, they are decent. I've read better but this one is definitely improved over the last one. Thank you for your putting this up on FF. Until the next chapter.
~Karnen
Ok I really like the story and what you have done. I just have one problem... When you did the whole "If Nanao was was mad then Naruto was ... F* HOMICIDAL" the difference in the words was enough. The cuss was out of place because it wasn't dialog, same with the capitals. It was completely unnecessary to capitalize and kind of ruined it for me. I recommend that you revise it to say that Naruto was "extremely homicidal" or something along those lines. a good writer doesn't add in what amounts to commentary to a story. Other than that, I think you're doing a good job with the story and would love to read more of it. As for the fight scenes, they are decent. I've read better but this one is definitely improved over the last one. Thank you for your putting this up on FF. Until the next chapter.
~Karnen
10/26/2009 c9 serin2
where some people build up ridiculiously long paragraphs in an effort to make it look like they're doing something, you've chopped yours to peices, avioding paragraphs too much. paragraphs are designed how they are for a reason, take advantage of it.
ja ne!
where some people build up ridiculiously long paragraphs in an effort to make it look like they're doing something, you've chopped yours to peices, avioding paragraphs too much. paragraphs are designed how they are for a reason, take advantage of it.
ja ne!
10/12/2009 c9 
1lordamnesia
Holy crap this is one of the better Naruto/Bleach cross overs where he is in the Bleach world. I would love to see more on this, since it has original Zanputo's and isn't a freaking Harem flick, not to mention a great storyline. Keep up the great work!
1lordamnesiaHoly crap this is one of the better Naruto/Bleach cross overs where he is in the Bleach world. I would love to see more on this, since it has original Zanputo's and isn't a freaking Harem flick, not to mention a great storyline. Keep up the great work!
4/27/2009 c9 DegenerateSage
some one suggested i read this so i did and man it was awesome but tell me why have u abandoned this it doesnt make since plz search for the inspiration to continue dam i am begging
some one suggested i read this so i did and man it was awesome but tell me why have u abandoned this it doesnt make since plz search for the inspiration to continue dam i am begging
4/26/2009 c9 Yuzuki-hime
haha, i lve the ramen bowl! I'm really curious as to wether or not naruto and Byakuya had any sort of interaction, i can just imagine how funny that could be!
haha, i lve the ramen bowl! I'm really curious as to wether or not naruto and Byakuya had any sort of interaction, i can just imagine how funny that could be!
3/31/2009 c2 The Sinful
She was in 8th squad as a little girl (seeming to be about 5ish). It's likely she was always in 8th, she definitely was for at least a century before Ichigo came and wreaked hell on the place.
She was in 8th squad as a little girl (seeming to be about 5ish). It's likely she was always in 8th, she definitely was for at least a century before Ichigo came and wreaked hell on the place.
3/26/2009 c9 4ObsidianEbony
The plot is very unique. I've never read a NarutoBleach x-over with Nanao as one of the main characters. I really hope you update soon. The way you wrote this fic is very smooth and not at all rushed.
4ObsidianEbonyThe plot is very unique. I've never read a NarutoBleach x-over with Nanao as one of the main characters. I really hope you update soon. The way you wrote this fic is very smooth and not at all rushed.
3/8/2009 c9 AkumaKaze
Great story dude. I've been inspired to write my own crossover now, haha!
Thanks for the great story man, and update soon!
Great story dude. I've been inspired to write my own crossover now, haha!
Thanks for the great story man, and update soon!