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for Loving you changed my life

11/23/2007 c4 54Harry Potter Fan 1994
Ooh! Maybe there could be fluff in the next chapter (hint hint) I wonder who Kori was talking to on the phone...
11/23/2007 c3 16Marlicat
Your story has potential, definitely. You have grammar problems, definitely. Please get an editor and fix your grammar mistakes. It really turns off readers when you have billions of grammar mistakes.

Keep Writing!
11/23/2007 c3 35Beautiful Thief
Alright... I have some constructive criticism for you. Whether or not you take it is your choice.

Your fic is practically in script format, except we don't know who's speaking, which is also really really annoying. Script format is against the site guidelines.

You need more description of the surroundings. This will help give your fic more dimension.

In short: Be mroe descriptive, don't use script format, tell us who's speaking. You might like to find a beta too, to help you. They don't just do spelling/grammar you know... I should know, I'm a beta myself.

Anyway, you've got a good foundation idea - but don't bring it down with slipshod writing.

Best of luck

11/22/2007 c3 22XxNightfirexX
I like it a lot
11/22/2007 c3 54Harry Potter Fan 1994
Yay, you used the 'Dick's hurt over a past relationship' thing! Who was that Kori was talking to, her boyfriend? Gasp that would get really dramatic...

Awesome so far :)
11/22/2007 c3 3ThePassionOfTheRose
Ok, I have a very visual mind, and somehow I managed to see what was going on. But could ya be a little more descriptive? PLease? Thanks!
11/22/2007 c2 6TAUT13
I really like it. IS this going to become the story, or are you going to write the actuall story later.
11/21/2007 c2 3ThePassionOfTheRose
^.^ I love this so far! It's great! Please hurry up and update soon! And if u need any help at all, you can always ask me. I'm here for anyone who needs help. :)
11/19/2007 c1 15raeXXstarry
Wow! PLease write it, it sounds like a good idea! :)
11/18/2007 c1 3ThePassionOfTheRose
I like that idea and title! Well, whatcha waiting for? POST IT! POST IT!
11/18/2007 c1 54Harry Potter Fan 1994
I like the idea! Hmm...maybe Rich should have a dark past too? Maybe like a cheating girlfriend or something, so he doesn't trust women anymore, and he reluctantly falls for Kori? Or a cheating fiancee, that would be more dramatic *shrug* I'm not sure, I like your idea though, and I hope you choose to right the story! :)
11/18/2007 c1 54Comicbookfan
I like it. Loving you changed my life is a nice title, and it seems like a good story. Now, some ideas are to do this on microsoft word, because then it will help you with grammar and spelling.

11/18/2007 c1 6TAUT13
It sounds like a very interesting story. I would probably read it. I also like the title. IT would be a really good story.
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