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for you broke my heart

3/22/2009 c1 6Catxisxme
I'm going to make a suggestion, but you don't have to listen to it at all if you don't want to.

For better rhythm, instead of "where my heart was there is now a hole" you could put "my heart is not whole" or something like that, and instead of "goodbye" maybe you could put "forever goodbye".

These are just suggestions, and you don't have to do anything with them.

Other than those two things, I love this poem!
1/1/2008 c1 10JUCHKO
That was very good. Your rhyme scheme was almost perfect, which is saying somthing if you only wrote it in 5 minutes.

~JUCHKO (aka: author of And the Circle Comes Round) ^_^
12/31/2007 c1 hate
i thought that it was alsome keep it up

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