Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Changing Tune

3/1/2008 c2 stilldemented
Also very well written. You seem to have a knack for the Naruto fics. I can only assume by neck wound you were talking about the curse mark?

I liked the dream sequence. You showed a direct comparison in how Sasuke changed after he recieved the curse mark. You also showed a sort of reasoning as to why Naruto is determined to bring Sasuke back. Correct? He believes the curse seal is the root of Sasuke's problems? Anyway good chapter.
3/1/2008 c1 stilldemented
Interesting. I can understand why this fic gets more attention. Naruto has a lot more fans than Resident Evil and Final Fantasy 7, so maybe you should concentrate more in the Naruto genre.

1st chapter is really well written, you have a nice writing style here. I like that you used the word assiduous. Quite the literary term. You also seem to put more detail in this fic than your others, which is a bonus for me. Keep it up.
2/25/2008 c4 12KainUltima
Coulda sword I already had this saved to my favorites. Anyways, I like it so far and I can't wait to read more. Good job.
2/25/2008 c4 4Narutomaniac
Hm this is a pretty good fic though you haven't used any Jutsu so I don't know if your gonna ruin the fic with English jutsu or if you will continue improving the fic by using Japanese jutsu. Oh and will your Naruto be stronger and faster than Cannon Naruto after the training? Cause Cannon Naruto is a weakling barely chuunin without Kyuubi's chakra and can't use enough of it to do crap against any of the people he'll have to fight and really Sasgay spends the time with the weakest of the Sannin and it seems like he's about to kill Itachi in the manga and Naruto is so slow he'd be killed by the majority of opponents if Kishimoto didn't write himself into a corner and have to make his opponents make some rookie mistake or fall for some stupid trick for Naruto to win. So please have Jiraiya actually train Naruto and not with Kyuubi's chakra since that weakens him I mean look he gains more strength with the secret of Kage bunshin in like a week or two than years with Jiraiya. So please have him learn the secret to kage bunshin on the trip, work on his wind affinity, speed, one handed rasengan since it's useless while he needs a kage bunshin, and don't have him use Kyuubi's chakra have him make a stand against Jiraiya and say he wants to get strong himself and not rely on the Kyuubi. That would be awesome and I wish is what happened in Cannon rather than learning basic sealing, a more useless version of Rasengan, weakened the seal by using more and more of Kyuubi's chakra which still isn't enough to do squat against Akatsuki and does more damage to him than his opponents. Just throwing suggestions out there, also just a thought but could you not have an idiot Naruto? I mean if he wants Sasgay to come back and bring him back then he's brining Sasgay back to his death since he's a traitor and would be executed, so if he cares for the bastard which any none mentally retarded person would hate the bastard for shoving multiple Chidori's in his chest, so have him give up since to bring him back is to sentence him to death. Oh and Oto wouldn't have a council since no way Orochimaru shares his power with a group of others.
2/24/2008 c4 9Muria
Nice. Tayuya's such a fun character... Your version of her's pretty cannon, but I like how she's reasonably weaker than an ANBU.

The 'Naruto mistakes Hideo for Tayuya' scene was pretty funny. :) Hideo's a likeable, and believable, OC.

Before I ramble anymore... Very nice writing. I hope you update soon!
2/22/2008 c4 crazyfoxdemon
Orochimaru is not a Hokage. He is not even a Kage. If you want to make him a Kage, then make him the Otokage (Sound Shadow). Other then that the chapter was alright. I hope you update soon
2/22/2008 c4 12Fehize
Oh, yeah! You updated! -claps and cheers- Hehehe, Tayuya seems to LOVE to have Naruto as his guide. Of course, her finding out that she was useless was certainly a shock to her.

Keep it up!
2/22/2008 c4 8DrendeSalkash
the Noob strikes hard and fast! this story has caught my attention since the first post of the first chapter, and its still just as good if not better
2/22/2008 c4 1TimeReaper
Update soon! =D
2/22/2008 c4 darksentry
Ha ha LOL so she spits toothpaste in naruto's hair!

sorry that was my fave part of the story so far anyway keep up the good work!
2/22/2008 c4 2rldragon
Ah, sorry to hear about the name order. Well, it doesn't really matter.

Anyway, this chapter is rather short when you count only the text and not ANs. Not to mention the fact that you updated after a long time :P

There is a mistake in your chappie. It says Orochimaru, First Hokage of Oto which is incorrect. The Hokage ( fire shadow ) can only be in Leaf. The leader of Oto would be called Otokage ( sound shadow ) if he wanted to be called that and if other major antions recognized him as such. In Naruto-world, there are only five kages however: Hokage, Kazekage, Raikage, Tsuchikage, Mizukage.

I also don't believe that disposing of Sound 4 is a C-rank. An A-rank is FAR more likely.

And about the whore, LOL!
2/12/2008 c3 1ArcticAC
your story so far is very good, tough I'm, pretty sure your Anko so far is way off. there is allways a reason for a persons behavioural patern (how they act). I read on a profile here on fanfiction, a very good explanation of Anko's personality, because I'm to lazy to write it in I'll just copy the text in:

"I hate fics where people make Anko out to be a whore she's not and heres my reasoning for it. I don't think she'd have any old lovers. She is an emotionally fragile person and has serious trust issues and hates to be vulnerable which is why I believe she's so flirtatious she likes to be in control and lead poor fools on thinking they have a chance with her only to smash those hopes to bits. With the betrayal of Orochimaru she would hate being emotionally vulnerable and sex even if she picked some random guy up would make her somewhat emotionally vulnerable and require her to trust her lover which wont happen and she would never accept that, then you have the fact that she knows she's gorgeous so she'd have extremely high standards which no guy I can think of could match, except Naruto since he knows a similar pain what with the villages scorn. That leads to yet another reason her sleeping around is HIGHLY unlikely, she knows most people think lowly about her and most men would try to get into her panties because she's hot and sexy only to dump her once they got the 'prize' she's smart, sly, and devious and would be able to tell their intentions, which is why I don't think she'd be with any guys. Those are my reasons based on logic why Anko should and would be a virgin".

while this is up to every writer to decide, what's above is probably correct, if not completely then atleast to some extent, psychology ain't something people are very big on here on fanfiction, which is why many good fic's have been ruined by characters acting completely different then what any human being would actually act, like best friends dies and your over it in a week, just doesn't happen, no matter how used to it you are, Anko is a dangerous character to use in a story, because she has abnormal amounts of emotional baggage, so be careful. you reaaly don't want to ruin such a good story.

anyways, the story is good, your writing style is excellent, you keep the attention of the reader, keep up the good work.

AntiChr1st
2/11/2008 c3 imsooobored
lol Like the idea. The word "hoar" is actually spelled "whore" lol. Almost all non-english words like "dango" do not require an "s" to make it plural. This includes words like bunshin which is clone(s), but you probably already knew that. That's pretty much all I'm going to mention cause those are the only ones I have problems with. Like the way you still have the characters in, well, character.
2/10/2008 c3 Roland Desagare
woot I'm gonna seriously wat for more of this story it is good.
2/6/2008 c3 17AnimeMaster24
Not bad so far, I think that this story has potential. Oh, and I just want to give you some friendly advice. Writing a story becomes more difficult as you get to the end, and there is also the fact that most people will deny reviews unless there is some sort of pairing. Don't get discouraged though, I believe that you don't have to have an abundance of romance to make a decent story, so do what you want and have fun with it.
192 « Prev Page 1 .. 8 9 10 11 12 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service