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for Dark Whispers

12/17/2012 c1 deactivated01010101010
This is a pretty old fanfic, and I don’t know if you still haunt this place anymore, but I came across your three DN fanfics, and I read all of them just now, including this one.

Now it seems to me that you have some kind of weird fetish for Evil!L. And it seems you ship L/Light. Not that that’s a problem in itself (although I personally don’t support the pairing). The problem is, like in all other fanfics that feature Evil!L, in the execution. All your stories featuring Evil!L read more or less the same.

First of all, I find the character tag “Evil!L” a bit redundant. Ohba himself has said that he views L as “slightly evil.” So maybe his evilness doesn’t reach the extent that Light’s does, but it’s still there. Fanfics that claim to feature “Evil!L” are basically taking what’s already there and stretching it, often to ridiculous and hypocritical extremes (killing Near? Really?). As bad as he is, even he has standards.

And why does the change come about? Because L thinks Light is hot and wants to jump his bones, and since Light’s doing it, he might as well go back on everything he set out to do and do it, too? Talk about OOC. I mean, that’s what it comes down to it, that’s how it starts, every single time. Is there no reason why L couldn’t become more evil independently? You could argue that prolonged exposure to the Death Note might have also contributed to his madness, but I think that really depends on the kind of person who is in contact with the Death Note, and whether they’ve used it. From what I could see, L didn’t actually write in the Death until towards the end.

I notice also that you try to squeeze in his sense of justice and the statistics showing that Kira’s activity is in fact affecting the crime rate. However, there are a few holes in that, as well.

1) It’s been stated by L himself—at least within the manga oneshot that takes place after the series proper—that L doesn’t do his job so much out of a sense of justice as he does it because it’s a hobby. Maybe he started with some kind of ideal on justice, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s burned out on that and is now doing it because he has nothing else. He also admits that he’s “a dishonest, cheating human being who hates to lose.” So when he plays dirty, at least he’s aware of it when he does, unlike Light who is quick to justify his actions as “righteous.” In that same vein, I would think that L, having as much influence as he does over the police, could probably exert some influence on the law, too, if he wanted. I mean, he was willing to test the 13-day rule using two cons on death row and have the one pardoned from execution, if he survived the experiment. If he can do that, he probably could’ve seen to it that that guy who’d killed the six girls got the maximum sentence for the nature of his crimes.

2) Numbers, like words, don’t always convey the entire truth and can be manipulated easily. L of all people, should be able to appreciate this better than most. Statistics can only display correlation, not causation. The crime rate may be going down, but WHY? Fear. There’s no such thing as killing in the name of peace, not real peace, anyway. Which would make Light, and in this case L, massive hypocrites: in their supposed effort to restore a sense of justice in the world, they are actually dismantling it even further. Although, like I said in the first point, justice isn’t exactly L’s chief motivation. In this case, it’s a matter of complete self-indulgence: in busting Light, he wouldn’t be able to jump his bones anymore, so he’s all, “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” But I would think at the very least, he’d be aware of that and not try to use “justice” to rationalize it. And that’s if he was interested in Light in that way, to begin with.

Not that I think a partnership between them could last that long, anyway…

On a minor note, where the hell did L find out the rule about shinigami not being able to have sex? While that is a true rule (if frequently ignored rule in fanfic), it’s not a relevant rule to the story or the notebook, so I doubt Ryuk or Rem would mention it, and there’s no way Light or anyone else would be able to, or be interested in, learning about it.

What I mean to say is, in making L eviler than he canonically is, I find that the writers strip away most of what makes him L, in the first place. And it almost invariably involves pairing him up with Light. You seem more concerned with the pairing than on actual story and character development. I mean, if you only wrote this and the other fanfics to appeal to the fetishes of certain fans, that’s one thing, but as a more serious fanfic, it just doesn’t float. That’s all I’ve got to say on it.
5/9/2012 c1 6Viviane Renard
Great story! I love how tormented L is, and how he eventually finds relief in his new idea of "Justice."
5/19/2011 c1 6killing u with umbrellas
loved it. but i can't help but wonder what happened to mello and matt.
12/12/2008 c1 Guest
despite some plot holes, very nice. i loved the unerringly logical characterization of L, and the writing the murderer's name orgasm scene was amazing.
11/29/2008 c1 4bosniadovlin
Ah! Evil L! Thanks for the good story. L is definitely not sane here, and I love it.
10/23/2008 c1 28Black-Dranzer-1119
This is awesome. Loved it. Well done
10/7/2008 c1 2izeitgeist
omg...this is...amazing. i was looking for a new type of story, something different, and i knew id be interested in the new topic, but this...THIS has completely blown me away.

its mind numbing, and beautifully written.

kudos to you.

4/24/2008 c1 6Jedi Master Bag
that was amazing

totally unexpected, and original!

good job
3/18/2008 c1 2UnknownZero
Ah, I must confess! The idea of an evil L amuses me as well. Whilst reading the manga, I had the smallest of hopes that he would join in Kira's conquest; but alsa, it was not so. Thus, I turn to fiction writers such has yourself to fullyill this dream. Nevertherless, writers of this particular path are few and far between.

In ends, I tip my hat to you and give credit where it tis due.

3/4/2008 c1 2Tenshi Youkai no Yugure
Why couldn't the series have ended this way? WHY!

Absolutely wonderful story, I hope for more like it in the future!


3/2/2008 c1 4iridescentcloud
wow. that was extremly well written. i'm actually starting to write a fic kinda like this. its nice to know that i'm not the only one out there thats had this idea. that was a fantastic fic.

2/27/2008 c1 6Black-Rose23
Kyah! I love evil!L
2/11/2008 c1 MushroomCap
"He had bigger cakes to bake"

I'm sorry, its 2:00 in the morning and I'm struggling to finish my DBQ(I thrive under pressure)s for my short and angry history teacher (damn Yaoi...keeping me from doing my work...but i do love Seme L...)

SO my sleep-deprived mind finds that line so incredibly funny that my mom came down stairs to see if I was feeling okay...seriously,...I apologixe for the stupidity of this review but hey, its two in the friggin morning...
2/6/2008 c1 unsolvedenigma
thumbs up to evil!L

its how i would have chosen to end the story as well, if given my choice. :D
1/26/2008 c1 34DarkPhoenixIncarnate
Wow. This is incredible. AMAZING. I LOVE this idea of L joining Kira! You've got to continue this! Please? *FAVS*
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