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7/22/2011 c15 A person who likes this story
You know what's really frustrating? When an author has spent a number of years on a well written story and leaves us hanging on the final chapter. I really want to know what happens, but my patience is wearing thin. You're at the home stretch yet you seem to hold back even though you have hit a grand slam. Unless you are extremely busy then I can see why you haven't updated. But wouldn't you be eager to finish something you worked so hard on for the last three years? Please update, I am very eager to read the finale.
5/17/2011 c15 Maddy
Oh I'm so glad you updated! Beautifully written chapter, the word flow felt very artistic and down to earth. I wonder if Ching will really see Kuo again, I agree that those two do work well together. But I wonder why the ancestors didn't greet Mushu, I hope nothing's wrong. Please update soon I would really like to know what happened.
5/9/2011 c15 19Narfy
*blows a little party horn* yay an update and yay a review from me!

Any way this was a very quiet chapter. sorry I know that sounds odd but that was how I saw it. Both Ching and Kuo go their separate ways and well they hope to see each other one day. And I really hope they do too, they seem made for each other. they have that cute friendship before falling in love thing going on. and I really liked how no one was at the Temple when Mushu arrived, I know you told me about it but for some reason I was having trouble seeing it in my mind until I actually read it. So good job.

Also there were a few errors near the beginning, but nothing too serious and I won't go into that much since you told us to give you some slack.

Well I hope you update soon, you are at the end of the road and we are all rooting for you. So keep up the good work and haave fun writing. :)
5/2/2011 c15 83Bookworm Gal
Loved this. But I want more soon. Please update in the near future.
2/26/2011 c14 Maddy
This is such a great story, the emmotions are beautifully done and even though it is a bit slow at times it still leaves me wanting more. I loved the part with Mushu arguing with the horse and when Ching visited her cousin, she was such a ditz to me and thats what made it interesting.

Will you be updating anytime soon? I would love to see more of this, I hope you haven't given up.
10/12/2010 c14 20levy120
.:: QUOTES ::.

#

"Well, that's just in case anyone might be looking for me. Those certain individuals whom I have stolen from, and… others."

^ I smell foreshadowing with the scent of plot ~

#

I suppose you wouldn't know how it is, but fathers place an awful lot on their sons

^ “That cloud reminds me of my daddy issues” 8D

I’m kinda wondering if we ever actually ever get to meet Kou’s father now ~

#

She gave an almost inaudible scoff at the words 'slightly-dishonorable'.

^ Not the only one ~

#

[…] for it seemed he'd been camping and being 'slightly dishonorable' for some time.

^ It must be his Design I guess. Mainly the lack of Long Hair/Topknot and stuff – makes him stick out negatively in social concerns - kinda like Short-Hair Mulan probably would, hadn’t she saved anybody. This unique design however makes it easy to imagine in my head and I do tend to have problems with keeping character designs in mind under normal circumstances ~

#

Now that food was gone, only really satisfying his hunger. It made him feel no better about Kuo; on the contrary it made him wonder from where his small supper might have been taken.

^ Says Mr. Porridge up his sleeve xD

#

"Oh no, no no. No way is this guy who she meant," he huffed to both Cri Kee-x and himself.

^ Yesitits %D

#

It wasn't just that doing that felt more to him like a manipulation than 'destiny'

^ Bah Mushu shuddup. Destiny follows you on your heels. Just ask Samiel ;P

#

She chuckled and lay her head down finally. "You, silent?"

^ PWND

Don’t worry Mushu, you have readers’ appreciation x3

#

.:: PLOT ::.

#

Mushu to the rescue, huurhdur x3

While needing a while to read into the scene to comprehend what’s going on due to the vagueness of it, I do appreciate your ‘action-attempt’. It’s nicely detailed, has a lot of movement and is easy to follow.

#

“If he could find a way to get in front of it, the horse might pause just long enough for Ching to get herself free. If he was lucky.”

CUE Cri-kee X!

Mushu really has a thing with horses. His first idea kinda reminded me on the comic Tom Bancroft did for Mulan 2 xD Especially since that performance kinda backfired on him as well, just differently.

#

“Being careful to keep his grip and still not be seen by the thief, Mushu crept along the side of the horse as it continued to race along into the night.”

^ Mental image of Luv. This has Fanart potential xD

The whole following scene is particularly vivid and stirs up my Mind-cinema.

#

The only thing that slightly irked me about this chapter is that after all this rumble they DO get back to bed just like that. I mean while they are awake they could just make a run for it, save some time, get on the road again and avoid the thieves coming back AGAIN. They could sleep in their lack once they arrive at the town in a nice comfy Inn with a bed… granted they can bring up some money for it. ^^”
9/14/2010 c14 19Narfy
*dances a dance of joy and happiness* YOU UPDATED!

Any way sorry about that. *ahem* I liked the chase scene with the bandit trying to run off with Ching and Mushu trying to find a way to stop them from taking her. That had some great action there and I really enjoyed reading it. That is odd though how Horses do not like Mushu, I wonder why? Maybe its just because he looks like a snake. And I am starting to wonder if there is something going on between Ching and Kuo, sure they are still not sure about each other now, but I sense they are going to get closer. Mushu's thoughts might be right.

Any way I am so glad you finally updated, it feels good to get one chapter off your mind now huh? Please update sooner I will be waiting, so keep up the good work and have fun writing. :)
8/8/2010 c1 TheRandomReviewer
TheRandomReviewer is coming.
5/24/2010 c13 20levy120
I loved the way how you described his dream sequence like some ultra time-lapse. And it works so well in the head too ~

“He shivered from the cool of the early morning, and shook himself free of the dew that had collected on him. That happened the last time he slept outside too.“

And it’s still adorable D

“These feelings of loneliness and exclusion of course weren't exactly the best.”

Hey! Hey! Mulan! Hey! Hey! Talk with me! Hey! I am amazing, I am the best! I am NOT A LIZARD! Hey! Hey! Mulan! Hey! Stop ignoring me! Hey! Heeey! Fine then! I can see what’s under your ar-

“have you ever lost anyone”

This is one issue I subtly seem to play a lot with, but I never really openly paid attention to it…

“He didn't remember his birth or his parents...though he must have had them.“

Or he was born adult since he was technically a man-made statue – but that’s another explanation for a completely different universe of fic and really bites with the English Ping Quote about “childhood” Trufax.

“"Yingtao?" Ching asked.”

WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP

“Of course had he known about the next big block in the road, he would have let her stop to give herself a full makeover for all the extra time used up”

Love that thing D

“"Heh, shows what you know," Mushu called back to Pahlin. "You know I could've just let her walk by ya know."”

Sure thing, Mushu, sure thing xD

“This was when Ching decided to abandon her attempts at undoing the knots and stomped up to meet him as he rushed to her horse's side.“

That tent was… rather far away, wasn’t it?

“"What about what?" the boy asked her, somehow seeming to think that the outburst had come from her.

"Uh, what...about sleeping arrangements?" she covered for Mushu doubly by asking and keeping the boy from realizing that the voice had come from slightly behind him. “

xD Neato~

The argument all in all was priceless especially since both of the points were actually clear and understandable – both parties have a point there. As for Kuo himself -

I kinda like him – he’s shaddy, but still nice. I suppose that’s due to his young age mostly and the way he dances around facts. I can actually quite picture him.

“"Yes on the first, and I'm traveling...alone," she didn't know if she should reveal this little detail, for of course this is how it would appear to him. She stole a miniscule glance to Mushu's hiding place as if for confirmation that this was alright.“

And if you ask anymore questions that should reveal how obviously vulnerable I am, I will have my guardian rip off your head and spill your guts over the forest flooooor ~ *hiss*

“[…] I'm sure the return journey will be much quicker."

It needs to be, thought Mushu.”

Inbetweener 3

"So he's riding with you too? And just where are we supposed to go while sticky-fingers is in our spot?"

I can just hear him saying that x3

Now my Plotbunny instincts tell me…

The big bad bandits show up, Mushu cannot handle them, Kuo saves Ching from them and with that earns his trust, Mushu gets jealous at first but calms down when Ching and Kuo fall for each other as Granny Fa has predicted.

How am I? 8D

I will see in ‘time’ ~
4/27/2010 c13 83Bookworm Gal
An interesting story and chapter. Great work.
4/27/2010 c13 19Narfy
Yay finally an update!

I loved the beginning with Ching asking Mushu if he had ever lost someone personal before. the way you wrote it made her sound so thoughtful and caring, I loved how Mushu seemed a bit confused by the question and gave her his best answer even though it wasn't really the correct one. Great job on that.

Kuo seems like an intelligent young fellow, very interesting too. Glad he was the one they ran into in getting Pahlin back and not the theives they saw earlier. At least he was being truthful about how he did take Pahlin from them but not in a thief like way, that was actually a very good dialogue you did. I found it rather quirky and smart (sorry my brain is not giving me the word I want to use, hopefully you know what I mean.) Also Ching trying to talk to Mushu with Kuo right in front of her was great too, I like how she was able to come up with something that sounded almost the same as what she said to Mushu.

Any way good job, I liked this chapter, I really hope you can update again soon, I know you are dying to finish this. You are almost done and I know youwill be so happy when it is finally complete and I will celebrate with you. But for now just keep up the good work and have fun writing. :)
2/28/2010 c12 20levy120
“She had attempted to follow them through the night with Mushu close behind, but the thief had the advantage, and the two later returned to camp after what seemed like hours of fruitless pursuit.”

^ My what a waste of time.

“They did not discuss it much, but there really wasn’t that much conversation at all.“

^ I had kind of expected the opposite, but I’m fine with both ^^

“If anything it was his.”

^ Not that he would say it outloud ~

“Both Mushu and Ching seemed to stop at the same time, but while he plopped down fairly easily on the side of the road, Ching nearly collapsed as she threw her bag down. It made a heavy thunking sound as it landed near enough to narrowly avoid smacking the dragon in his face with the strap.

Ching flumped to the ground with such force that her skirt poofed up around her, which caused her to take out some of her frustration by flattening it back down animatedly with her hands.“

^ This particular scene came out so incredibly graphic, no words could have described it better ~

“You and me, I mean…maybe they made a mistake. In fact I’m pretty sure they did.”

^ Descendent of Mulan… really? Yes. Mountain scene says it all ~

Mourned enough, now time to bring your family some honor and move on, kid ;D

It’s in your blood ~

“He made this big case of why he should do it instead, and I know he would not have let this happen.”

^ I smell implications of “Daddy Issues” ~

Seems like someone never brought up trust or confidence in his education, which would kind of explain her distance to Mushu at first.

“What could he say, she loved Mulan and didn't want to let her family down, he could relate.”

“It was an unspoken understanding – almost like a bond”

^ Le hug

“The whole third day afterwards Mushu had noticed the positive change.“

^ Just then, huh? xD

“They had the good sense to ration the food, but it was running very low, down to only the least perishable items.“

^ This is one of the points that I rarely see to be pointed out in fanfics at all. Things that are actually so taken for granted that you don’t consider what would happen if they were gone. I would have probably forgotten about it ^^

"I don't suppose you hunt for food, do you?"

^ I’d like to see that xD

Of course he could maybe take on a random falcon, but that would maybe rarely be enough for Ching ;P

Mushu chasing a deer or something would make a hilarious picture though.

“That you were an invention she had made that symbolized something I never got.“

That’s some nice way of putting it actually, but if we consider the “secretive” part of guardianship it is actually not all too surprising that she never mentioned much of him.

People who DO know about guardians might have gotten it anyway, people who don’t would have assumed her crazy instead.

– this was around the time Grandma Fa passed on –

^ (Great) Great Grandma Fa ;)

And I do get what you mean about the frisson, giving it so much emphasiz and implications

(e.g. “There was another part though, that alerted him this had felt much differently than the friendly platonic bonding the three of them had enjoyed today.“)

there must be way more to in than it seems, and I’m rather edgy to see what’s up with that. Dark ominous shadow feeling?

Growing compassion?

A sudden human skin allergy? ;D

We’ll see ~
2/2/2010 c12 19Narfy
Not descriptive enough!

Girl this was well written! Mushu and Ching are going through something now and they both now know that they need each other in this. I loved the beginning, I can picture them just dragging themselves as they move through the road hoping to find some sor to help or Pahlin somehow. I hope they do find her. and the last paragraph about Mushu sitting under the stars I can picture that in my mind as well and it looks fabulous.

I enjoyed this chapter, plus we got to hear about Mulans history after the sequal though I might have missed this, you can yell at me if you want about this, but where did Mushu go after the sequal, you would think he stayed around with her forever. But I probably missed something, let me know.

Again great descriptions, you did great. I hope you update soon so keep up the good work and have fun writing. :)
2/2/2010 c12 Geekgirl
Nice work. Keep up the great work. The chapter was so enjoyable.
12/29/2009 c11 20levy120
“and maybe a tiny bit of singeing one of Ching's toes”

^ hr x3

Ping and Ching interaction was well done. Ching remained so calm with her retort, not quite the hot-headed guy her guardian is, isn’t she? x3

Ping however took the whole encounter surprisingly calm.

Mushu doesn’t seem to be all too fond of Ping, I wonder if the name has anything to do with it to top it all D

“and the weather was cooperating as well with its sunny and only slightly cloudy skies.“

That cloud reminds me of my daddy issues.

The description of the campsite setting was lovely done, I could picture it all too well in my head and I usually tend to have a lot trouble with imagining locations and all, so kudos =)

Every bit of Mushu/Mulan ANYTHING reference fills me with inner glee ~

Same goes with the implied Mushu/Ching moment, that was adorable D

The little grip in sleep thing – even though it is classic – caught me rather off-guard there xD

I expected something else there, but that would have prolly been over the top to only be produced of my crazy mind. (Whe advanced petrifaction for no apparent reason? Or Mulan doing worse? Or… whatever - Yes shoot me, please)

I also wonder why Mushu was so scared about it in first place… The ‘surprise’ argument somehow didn’t really hit on me xD

And ohnoez! Cliffhanger!

Without a horse – are they gonna make it in time?

Is Mulan still gonna survive?

Honestly, going after that little universe bit, something in the back of my mind tried to tell me that Mushu still feels more responsible for Mulan than he does for Ching.

As the bandit came however it kind of twist and turned. Let’s see if this is what was needed to have them warm up for each other – although at some point I expect Ching to even be MADDER at him for not noticing this any earlier.

Basically I would have thought that Pahlin had enough of character-strength to avoid this from happening, by just playing a little rodeo with the thief, but then again, he’s just an animal as well. Horses and sna… *shot* dragons.

I can see Mushu mentally ranting about that untrustworthy nag xD

All that much ~

Happy Birthday, honey ^^

For some odd reason I hear the Mulan opening theme in the back of my mind now…
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