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for The Other Keyblade Master

10/19/2008 c11 4blackrogue123
Hey, Scorch, I'm REALLY sorry for taing so long to review, I've just been so caught up in my own problesm that it completely slipped my mind .;

Anyway, interesting chapter, Nazo reminds me a heck of a lot of Nihlus, given the fact that they both believed certain main characters to be evil and tried to kill them...more or less XD

I'm not too sure about wht you have in mind for Jax and Jules, but I'm guessing that they'll either get together, Jules'll die, or that something happens that causes them to both agree to break it off...sorry if I unintentionally guessed a spoiler or something .;
10/13/2008 c11 tea

this was really good

i love the intense passion between jax & jules

i wanna see more of that

other than that

everything was greatt

watch your spelling as usual

how do you not know how to spell clothes the right way?

and dumb lmaoo fix that
10/13/2008 c11 14Nightshroud
Pretty cute interaction between Jax and Jules in this chapter. Well I guess they're back in Traverse Town again. Wonder what Leon and Co. will have to say to that. =)
10/13/2008 c11 5Elizabeth Vida
cool story love
9/11/2008 c10 4slyfan123
yo its cristi. Thanks for the FF12 references! you know I love it!
9/11/2008 c9 slylover123-Cristina duh
Relax, I'm right here. check your spelling one, twice, and then again. besides that...you're getting better!

peace, love,

7/8/2008 c10 dana
wow angelo i really enjoyed reading this !its written very well and i hope you continue with it !i really like my character and her personality,also bella is just like tea in real life!aggresive at times

awesome story:]
7/5/2008 c10 14Nightshroud
Yeah I thought I recognized that. Balthier is awesome. ^^ Anyway I like this group. They're pretty funny. =)
7/5/2008 c10 4blackrogue123
Huh, interesting chapter! Jax certainly does have a habit of making...interesting friends, doesn't he? James may be on the nerdy side, but I'm begining to feel sorry for him, he's always the unluckiest out of the trio, isn't he?
7/4/2008 c10 Tea


i was dying when i read this

Bella reminds me of someone...

i wonder who it is hehehe

mika cristi & danita are just like the real people

this was the funniest chapter lmaoo

nice job just watch your spelling

i think i grammar was okay THIS TIME

lol now i'm gonna stop sounding like an english teacher hehehe

can't wait to read more =]]
7/3/2008 c1 3pyroguy14
Okay. This is good, but it does need some extra editing. About halfway through, Jax is reading the note from Mickey and he says: "Me a hero? Yea right. And heartless, what kind off nonsense is that?" 1. "Yea" should be yeah. 2. "off" should be "of". Also, in the actual note from Mickey, there is a sentence that reads: "The kid in the other picture is Sora." Maybe it's just me (it wouldn't be the first time...), but I don't think Mickey would've used the word "kid". Maybe something along the lines of "young man", or something of that nature. Also, King Mickey doesn't choose the keybearers, the keyblade does. Bear in mind, this is only my humble opinion. It's a great story otherwise.
7/3/2008 c9 whatsgoodies
umyum tumimso seriousthatwassmexcidoitagain

so now were gonna look at bella huh? she should wake up in a pit and get hit by a train, telling me i have whores...omg

anyway nice end to the chapter man :D

and kill bella.KILL HER
6/5/2008 c1 4blackrogue123
Hm, well, I havn't seen much differanc ein this and the original, but it was a good deal more descriptive. Overall, I'd say the re-write was a success. You could have described the "boss" just a tiny bit better, but other than that, this was an improvement in my opinion.
6/5/2008 c9 14Nightshroud
Hmm I guess his 4 friends. Good chapter, btw. Sorry that I haven't reviewed. Still love your story. ^^ Update soon.
6/1/2008 c9 4Drifter of the Forgotten Ones
great story so far!
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