for Slayer in Forks5/7/2016 c10 Godalem
What part of not killing people, does buffy not understand. They tell her, they only drink animal blood and she says "They hurt people", unless she counts saving people at a hospital, hurting
What part of not killing people, does buffy not understand. They tell her, they only drink animal blood and she says "They hurt people", unless she counts saving people at a hospital, hurting
3/19/2011 c7 I Know I'm A Dreamer
You know, you're making it very hard for me to breathe with all my laughing. I'm running out of breath in almost every chapter. Your story is waay to funny in most parts.
You know, you're making it very hard for me to breathe with all my laughing. I'm running out of breath in almost every chapter. Your story is waay to funny in most parts.
3/19/2011 c6 I Know I'm A Dreamer
Dying of laughter . . . whole time.
Re-reading this story never gets old.
Good thing Buffy learned and didn't try to kill the Cullens and Bella again in the epilougue.
Dying of laughter . . . whole time.
Re-reading this story never gets old.
Good thing Buffy learned and didn't try to kill the Cullens and Bella again in the epilougue.
12/20/2010 c20 I Know I'm A Dreamer
Yah! IN your face Buffy! I'm glad she didn't attempt to kill Bella the second time, and it is too bad she tried to kill her friend. Oh well, that's the way the world works.
Yah! IN your face Buffy! I'm glad she didn't attempt to kill Bella the second time, and it is too bad she tried to kill her friend. Oh well, that's the way the world works.
12/20/2010 c12 I Know I'm A Dreamer
I'm laughing so hard I'm going to start rolling on the floor! Alas my sides!
I'm laughing so hard I'm going to start rolling on the floor! Alas my sides!
8/10/2010 c15 
1NarutoCrazy001
The story is funny, but it doesn't flow. You go from one place to the next with no bridge in between that show it has changed. Also the story is very random. It makes the story funny, but their is no real story line. One other thing that could be improved is who is talking. You write "I" from Buffy POV, but then switch the "I" into Bella POV without telling your readers. It makes the story harder to follow. You have talent, you just need to polish this story. I don't want to sound rude, for I know how hard it is to write a story that flows. I still have problems with making my stories flow.
1NarutoCrazy001The story is funny, but it doesn't flow. You go from one place to the next with no bridge in between that show it has changed. Also the story is very random. It makes the story funny, but their is no real story line. One other thing that could be improved is who is talking. You write "I" from Buffy POV, but then switch the "I" into Bella POV without telling your readers. It makes the story harder to follow. You have talent, you just need to polish this story. I don't want to sound rude, for I know how hard it is to write a story that flows. I still have problems with making my stories flow.