for My Fantacy Lover2/11/2024 c1 catspats31
While the writing quality of your story is good in terms of spelling and grammar, please note this part of the Content Guidelines:
"Please note FanFiction does not accept explicit content, Fiction Rating: MA, and the rating is only presented for reference."
Go remove every single detailed description of physical interaction of sexual or violent nature in this story if you want it to remain at this site, or upload it to a site where "Fiction MA" content is allowed such as Archive Of Our Own.
While the writing quality of your story is good in terms of spelling and grammar, please note this part of the Content Guidelines:
"Please note FanFiction does not accept explicit content, Fiction Rating: MA, and the rating is only presented for reference."
Go remove every single detailed description of physical interaction of sexual or violent nature in this story if you want it to remain at this site, or upload it to a site where "Fiction MA" content is allowed such as Archive Of Our Own.
6/26/2009 c2 anonoymous
You did a wonderful job. I want more please! This was so awesome I totally saw the ending coming and loved how you did the scenes fom both point of views!
You did a wonderful job. I want more please! This was so awesome I totally saw the ending coming and loved how you did the scenes fom both point of views!
3/25/2009 c2 
6Angelicatt
That's quite a way to end it...now they know that they are real and that they were really together..will they ever find each other again.
6AngelicattThat's quite a way to end it...now they know that they are real and that they were really together..will they ever find each other again.
3/16/2009 c1 7xXxMistressChaosxXx
Omg that was f*ckin amazin! u should've add another chapter were they find out that the other is real
7xXxMistressChaosxXxOmg that was f*ckin amazin! u should've add another chapter were they find out that the other is real
3/15/2009 c2 gigglez30
I hope that u continue this story, I want to see a happy ending with Kagome and Sesshomaru, and want to know if Kagome is pregnant with Sesshomaru's baby, so plz and add more! Thanx!
I hope that u continue this story, I want to see a happy ending with Kagome and Sesshomaru, and want to know if Kagome is pregnant with Sesshomaru's baby, so plz and add more! Thanx!
3/10/2009 c2 silentxsam
REVIEW REVIEW OR I WILL MURDER!
REVIEW REVIEW OR I WILL MURDER!
3/7/2009 c2 5mesmerizing
I must say what a "sex site" was a very creative topic for this story. You have somewhat perfected it yet it could have used a little more background information such as how Kagome and Sesshomaru came to this site, what they were like before this site, thier dating experience, interests and turn offs.
Your lemons were a C+ to a B- compared to my experience in writing sex scenes and some other lemons i have read especially the very first one i read IT WAS EXTREMELY HARDCORE, sadly i do not remember the name of it. I suggest getting a few tips from other authors that have written well known lemons would improve the scenes or you could ask me for some advice. Although just to be clear you have grasped the concept, but you need some rawness or really graphic descriptions to really capture your readers. When i read this it was well written but it did not make me feel as if i were Kagome it was too routine. Here is the trick about writing lemons: 1. get really graphic and raunchy 2. when you re read make sure you feel aroused or turned on that way you will know your readers will feel the same.
5mesmerizingI must say what a "sex site" was a very creative topic for this story. You have somewhat perfected it yet it could have used a little more background information such as how Kagome and Sesshomaru came to this site, what they were like before this site, thier dating experience, interests and turn offs.
Your lemons were a C+ to a B- compared to my experience in writing sex scenes and some other lemons i have read especially the very first one i read IT WAS EXTREMELY HARDCORE, sadly i do not remember the name of it. I suggest getting a few tips from other authors that have written well known lemons would improve the scenes or you could ask me for some advice. Although just to be clear you have grasped the concept, but you need some rawness or really graphic descriptions to really capture your readers. When i read this it was well written but it did not make me feel as if i were Kagome it was too routine. Here is the trick about writing lemons: 1. get really graphic and raunchy 2. when you re read make sure you feel aroused or turned on that way you will know your readers will feel the same.
3/6/2009 c2 3LadyofDarkness24
i hopw you wright another story or a continue one if this one it is very good and i hope to see more of your work
3LadyofDarkness24i hopw you wright another story or a continue one if this one it is very good and i hope to see more of your work
3/5/2009 c2 Winged Miko
how dare U? Make a sequel & a happy ending before i chop ur legs off!
how dare U? Make a sequel & a happy ending before i chop ur legs off!
3/5/2009 c2 1Mirror Gaze
why don`t you continue this story?its a good plot.in fact i would really enjoy a story like this.*hint
1Mirror Gazewhy don`t you continue this story?its a good plot.in fact i would really enjoy a story like this.*hint
3/5/2009 c1 Beth
I liked it. It wasn't nearly the best I've read, nor was it in anyway near the worst. You have a pretty standard lemon here, so you succeeded, I think you can do it. However, you really need to spell check and grammar check. I noticed several mistakes within the first few paragraphs. Flaws like that automatically distract the reader from the actual contact of you story. So write carefully, and check carefully. But good job, and keep working on it. You certainly aren't bad, and there is always room for improvement.
I liked it. It wasn't nearly the best I've read, nor was it in anyway near the worst. You have a pretty standard lemon here, so you succeeded, I think you can do it. However, you really need to spell check and grammar check. I noticed several mistakes within the first few paragraphs. Flaws like that automatically distract the reader from the actual contact of you story. So write carefully, and check carefully. But good job, and keep working on it. You certainly aren't bad, and there is always room for improvement.
1/31/2009 c1 3Lady of Dreams and Nightmares
Make a sequel where they actually meet?
in a really weird coincidence?
3Lady of Dreams and NightmaresMake a sequel where they actually meet?
in a really weird coincidence?