Just In
for Semper Fidelis

7/13/2012 c1 2Gasoline Diamond
OMFG! I'm so happy I' not the only being in the world that watches 'Bones'! I could die of happiness right now! Can't wait to see what's next!
9/4/2011 c7 4Imagine The Dreamers
omg, 2 years! CONTINUE!
12/5/2010 c7 14cyang
PLEASE update! i just cant wait to see what's going to happen! I hope it isn't Dr. Brennan that got the extra dose!
10/30/2010 c7 paigeegirl3
please.more..like this is too hard to wait
12/28/2009 c7 1Rilakuma
EXCELLENT CHAPTER! Please write more, I can't wait to see what happens!
7/28/2009 c7 Firefly404
This is a very good written story - please complete - I would love to see the end and if Brennan can be saved. Please please! Firefly404
5/4/2009 c7 10bookwormlady
This is very suspenseful, but I'm a little confused.

“Six out of the seven aren’t affected. Care to guess which one?”

“One of the six has been given a quarter of a vial more than the others.”

So is it one isn't affected and six have been poisoned, or six have been poisoned and...?
5/3/2009 c7 1kimmiej77
update soon!
5/3/2009 c7 1crazycamera
hm think i will be reading this story to see what happes!
5/3/2009 c7 12Interest Me
Disclaimer: I do not own anything! ((LOL))

what was he to expect of criminals who even hid the true timbres of their voices? ((Interesting observation))

The Special Agent strode to the abandoned phone booth, or what was left of it. A rusted pole and a rusted box on top was all that was there, phone long gone. ((NICE—totally emphasizes the lonliness of the area!))

The doors were open vaguely, a sliver of darkness tainting the sun soaked arid ground. ((NICE))

Temperance became swiftly bored after the departure of her co-workers. The first to leave had been Booth, the last had been Angela. She frowned at the memory of Booth going outside to receive a call and then coming back in to say goodbye to leave. ((In Brennan’s head))

Brennan flushed slightly as she responded, “Yes, we are partners. We work together on a daily basis so you can say that we are pretty proximate to each other.” ((proximate—funny!))

The cruel chuckle he’d heard on the phone now reverberated in his ears as Booth looked at the seven familiar faces that confirmed his worst fears. (creep meter rising steadily)

Heart beat against ribcage, threatening to break out. Lungs filled with panicked breaths and expelled the oxygen in short, frenzied bursts. ((Nice))

Oh God, what have I done, what have I done? (what did he do? I’m on the edge of me seat here!)

“You’ll have pain at the injection site for a few hours. Nothing too serious I would hope. It will then fade until a point in time about which you will receive more information in the (ew)

“This contract cannot be fulfilled with normal ink I’m afraid. But compared to what's coming, I'm sure a little bleeding won't faze you now.” (okay, compared to what’s coming? Menacing foreshadow)

Whatever it takes. No matter what.
5/1/2009 c6 1Rilakuma
This story is amazing. I love the BoothAngst. Can't wait for more. Please post soon!
4/28/2009 c6 12Interest Me
Disclaimer: Fox owns all. ((Hail Fox. LOL))

What do I do now? Should I tell Cullen? Bones? Someone else in the Bureau? ((Sure feeling his

A guess, that if proven correct, he knows will bring him to his knees before this new threat. ((OH, I’m getting all angsty))

“You can go to hell.” ((You tell him!))

“I’m going inside now. Then we can talk more about your twisted plans while I figure out a way to shoot you as soon as possible.”((Love it))

Leave it to me to get checked out when in dangerous situations. ((Love yourself much. LOL))

Arriving at Bone’s hallway, he couldn’t help but hear voices and laugher growing closer as he neared Temperance’s room door. ((I find it distracting to refer to her as Bone’s and then Temperance. I realize each character will call her different things, but in the narrative I think it’s best to choose one name.))

It’s only been a couple of hours, how are they supposed to think everything’s fine if you’re already messing up you façade? ((Booth-he’s so good!))

“Whoa! Too many questions there FBI knight in shining armor. You are not giving the princess enough time to respond.” Angela chastised, a smirk lighting up her features.((LOVE LOVE LOVE Angela))

“Yeah, well you also find action and mini figures interesting Sweets.” Jack said, momentarily inciting laughs from the others and earning a soft glare from the young psychologist.

“Says the entomologist who dwells in conspiracy theories.”

“Ooh, ouch! I think Sweets is growing up!” ((Go Sweets! Funny exchange))
4/28/2009 c5 Interest Me
You’re Not Going Anywhere ((creepy))

Pick It Up. ((Evil genius likes games of manipulation. Very good! Sets me on edge.))

Booth was silent. He couldn’t talk. Who else was being threatened? Who else was in danger? A knot of horror and alarm choked his throat, making it difficult to even swallow. ((Is he thinking Paker?))


Special Agent Martin Brody walked quickly down the dimly lit parking lot, making his way to a payphone situated not too far away. He stuck his hands in his pockets, trying to keep them warm in the chilly night weather. ((Nice involvement of senses. ))

“I…I did what you asked. I did everything that you asked. Now please, please… tell me where she is.” ((plot thickens. This is a surprise))

“You are forgetting your priorities Agent Brody. You will do as you are told. You will follow our orders. Or you’ll never see her again. Is that what you want? I assure you. We are more than ready to end it that way.” ((This guy is in BIG trouble when they catch him))

“You are to assist whoever is on the investigation. Provide them with the information you have found so far, but keep from them anything we order you to. You are not to mention anything we prohibit to anyone. You are not to contact anyone in any way. You are not to even try to hint at our existence to anyone. You are not as safe as you think. We have.

An unusually plain tie was thrown around his neck. He tightened it clumsily. The belt was pulled through the pant loops carelessly, no cocky belt buckle to adorn it. ((I wonder if Brennan will pick up on that))

They live or they die. Really, it’s all up to you... Now, isn’t that just peachy? ((creeps!))

((I like how you alternated Booth’s memory of the conversation with his thoughts and actions. Nice movement-and much more interesting than blocking it together))
4/28/2009 c4 Interest Me
. One of the more recent psychological evaluations states that,” Brody opened his own copy of the report and read “‘Scientist Brett Halverson shows disturbing mental and emotional instability. Provided with the results of several psychological tests, I strongly recommend Halverson’s immediate discharge.’” ((Oh dear, Mad Scientist on the lam. Or does he prefer EVIEAL GENIUS?))

Halverson engineered a possible vaccine for increasing a person’s resistance to hazardous biological pathogens. Initially, when tested on mice and rats, it proved positive, also enhancing stamina, coordination and problem solving skills, which then gave the project its name.” ((Wow, Creepy. Good job))

Brody took a deep breath. This was the part where things got ugly. ((You mean they aren’t ugly yet? This is gonna be good))

“And where are those vials now Brody?” Elan asked darkly, already knowing the answer.((and where are the test subjects?))

“There’s one problem sir. The reason the lab finally called for our help, is that the other five scientists who worked with Halverson directly on the project, have also gone missing.”((Whoa! Ruh roh))

“I highly doubt Jasper and Brainy Smurf will offer much protection Booth.” ((Very sweet!))

“I have just one question for you Agent Booth. How far are you willing to go to save her?”((Evil!))

Wicked, evil Cliff. I can’t stand that guy!-Cliff.
4/28/2009 c3 Interest Me
I love your chapter titles! I also love that Jasper and Brainy Smurf get to make another appearance.

“I’m pretty sure rubidium is 85.4678.” a weak voice stated. Booth turned to look and the once again awoken Bones. ((classic Bones))

It was a realistic sculpture of a wolf, with a finely detailed body and paws, and eyes such an expressive, brilliant almond that it seemed almost real. ((okay, but here is the thing. You have a pig, a smurf, and a wolf-but only one rowboat. You can only carry one at a time. How do you get them safely across the river without anyone getting eaten. Sorry—couldn’t resist.))

“Pudding is your favorite dessert Booth.” ((exactly))
41 Page 1 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service