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for A Goddess and a half

10/14/2013 c2 69ShadowRogue9799
plz plz plz plz plz continue this
11/25/2009 c2 god of all
Great chapter and story so fair pleases continue the story soon.
4/3/2009 c2 Cylon One
Think it's going pretty good.

Hope you'll be able to update.
3/11/2009 c1 recon12
huh is all i shall say.
3/11/2009 c1 6YoshuD
I read the summary, and knowing that it was an OMG cross, I thought "Huh, maybe Yosaggi is an OC, rather than Yggdrasil." Then I read the first chapter, cringed, and changed my opinion. The story has potential, but you seriously need a beta reader and a non-derivative plot hook of your own. Ranma as a god has been done many, many times before.

And to borg-rabbit, I believe the author meant "Onne-chan" to be "Onee-chan" or something similar.
3/9/2009 c2 13borg rabbit
Sorry, I tried to read it. I just couldn't keep going.
3/9/2009 c1 borg rabbit
Soutome should be Saotome—do a find and replace.

Onne-chan should be something else—don't know japanese well enough.

Uld should be Urd—do a find and replace.

Belldad... should be Belldan...—do a find and replace.

Souh should be Tendo Soun—do a find and replace.

(Kuno) Kuno was not happy. S/B Kuno was not happy. Drop the first (Kuno)

"Happo-five-sien" should be "Happo Five Yen Satsu"

Ranma "Promised" to maintain Hinako's adult form. The fulfillment should have taken the form of a blessing, NOT a wish.

Seriously, consider a beta reader that writes english fluently and get the correct spellings into the spell checker.

Keep trying. If english is a second language, you're doing very well.

3/9/2009 c1 18Lerris
Edit your work carefully. Follow good writing practices. Use, "He said" and similar as appropriate. Be consistent with punctuation. Add an extra line between paragraphs. Basically don't post something that barely qualifies as a rough draft.
3/9/2009 c2 6ecchansama
Saotome Nodoka, not Soutome Nadoka.

Ninomiya Hinako.

Please start the characters' names with upper case.

Please gather your explanations at the end of the chapter, with numbers showing what goes where.

Please use punctuation.

Please use something to show who is speaking, and preferably a new line for every speaker.

Please don't use words and phrases in Japanese without looking up spelling. It's Onee-san, or more commonly Oneesan.

The formatting is ... less than good. To be honest I didn't read this, the formatting is too bad.

Sorry, but this needs work before I consider it readable. If it reaches that stage I'll start commenting your story.
3/9/2009 c2 Jerry Unipeg
I wish you luck in this story.
3/9/2009 c1 Jerry Unipeg

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