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for A New Dawn

12/30/2010 c3 NoUsername0909
"Seriously, next one is NOT gonna take that long. I promise it won't. Swear it won't. I-"

Updated: 11-30-09

What the-? A year and a month? O.o How in the jebus is THAT-

Memory: Uh...shouldn't you be reviewing?

Oh right, right. So I actually have no idea why I chose to read THIS story. I've never even been too interested in pokemon, even though I used to watch a few of the episodes when I was little. It's 1:40 in the morning, and I'm currently planning a Tron fanfic in the back of my mind. Yet...here I am? o.o

Despite knowing shiz about pokemon, the writing doesn't confuse me o.o my head just sort of fills in the blanks that I have and I can enjoy the story, simply because of the way it's written. Plus, it's nice to see the characters to be consistent (even though there's only 3 chapters and there's not much room for development. Curses! D). I guess it's easier to achieve that when they're based off real people xD. And I love how Will acts, not entirely sure why. He just cracks me up. But at the same time, he's still a kid. Their reactions, the way they act, and the things that happen to them are all very believable in their own way o.o

Although...I'm not gonna lie, but whatever happen to you between 2009 and 2010 made you a waaaaaay better writer, Oto. Your writing's a lot less choppy now, you use fewer useless adjectives, and the dialogue flows more. But this is still pretty impressive 8D.

"So this is how my world ends... not with a bang, but with a whimper..." - I would totally quote that if I wasn't afraid of you hunting me down and stabbing me .

Also, I love the name Amber, since it makes me think of In Amber Clad. Bonus points D

All in all, twas enjoyable. Although I keep wishing your fanfictions would last MORE than just 5 chapters or so D

Now I attempt to remember why the jebus I chose to review a story you haven't updated in a year at 1 a.m ._.'


Well...reviews are always nice. That should be reason enough xD -salutes-
5/26/2010 c1 chaison
this is awsome. thats all i can say
1/4/2010 c3 Ghost Master
OOH! OOH! I KNOW! IT SPELLS REVIEW! AHA HA HA HA! Oh, and by the way, since this is the "real" world, techniques like splash don't matter. Just let that magikarp into a pond filled with other magikarp and tell it to start ramming things. Magikarp can probably swim pretty fast, seeing how they're are defenseless in almost every other way except for the modest protection from their scales. By the way, how does the intelligence of pokemon work in this world? Does it vary? Are there variations bred for different reasons (food, pets, fighting) where the intelligence depends on the type of variation? Dom wild pokemon have the intelligence of an animal but are enlightened by some genetic alteration caused by their pokeball? Just something to think about. Oh, and one other thing. If the scientists got moves like flamethrower and megadrain, can't they get moves that heal other pokemon (and humans!)? It doesn't seem a far stretch. In fact, if I were one of those scientists, that would be my number one priority.
6/1/2009 c2 Ghost Master
I probably shouldn't complain about little details like this, but zubat can't learn mega drain. Or absorb. Or giga drain. Except possibly as egg moves, but since this zubat was probably grown in a lab, I don't think that would apply. Oh, and shouldn't these pokemon be tougher than normal animals? So that a pokemon that was on fire could survive long enough to be returned to its pokeball and kept there until it could get proper treatment? Just a thought. By the way, I think Amber should evolve into an espeon. It's not my favorite eevee evolution, its just that amber can be used to make jewlry, like the jewl on espeon's forehead, and it could use psychic to block attacks and get it out of situations where it would normally die. like if it was about to be hit by flamethrower or a berserk killer rhydon. And there should be an Ood Steve equivelent, except it should be a psychic pokemon that communicates with telepathy, so you could give him an excuse to call Will "Master." And Harvey should appear too. Maybe as the antagonist.
6/1/2009 c1 Ghost Master
Good start. Although... do you really need to make the pokemon say their names like in that stupid anime? I really think that you could edit that. P.S. I'm not complaining, but it seems that almost every pokemon fanfic has eevee in it. And the ones that don't have a starter pokekmon, a ledgendary, or lucario, for reasons mentioned in Dalek's fic Pokemon Spotlight. Just an observation.
5/25/2009 c2 Ood Steve
Fine work, Oto.

Now if you could put me in there, or refrence me or make a spin-off of me, then it would be incredible.
5/20/2009 c2 8Dalek-Who
So, Chris has some sort of crazy, twisted Pokemon loving crush on Amber? I wonder how that will play out in the real world? Haha, You got DALEKowned!
5/11/2009 c2 18Furyfur
Awesome! This story contrasts Pokemon and reality and makes you ask questions! Just as every good story should!

I don't know that wise man. I have never heard that saying in my life. It's smart, though.

Nice second chapter, and I hope you keep writing! ~Furyfur
5/6/2009 c2 Slowtype1
Very interesting story. First one I've read where the game is a game and life is different from the game. Pity that the pokemon die so easily. Oh well. If it were me I would probably act like Chris, but think like Will. I probably would avoid battling as much as possible to prevent my pokemon from dying. I wonder if you are going to add to the group or just leave it as a duo. Please keep the awesomeness coming!
5/5/2009 c1 Slowtype1
Awesome story! I love it. Please continue
5/5/2009 c1 Furyfur
I like it! I really think you should continue it. Go Eevee! =cough= Sorry. Nice story and hopefully I will call this first chapter! Because I think you should make more! With bad guys and stuff like that! ~Furyfur
5/4/2009 c1 8Dalek-Who
Definently continue it bro! I am counting on you! Yea you got a lot of the aspects of me correct! Crap, now I am going to have to make something in honor of you!

And everyone else who is reading this should know that Pokemon are for everyone and forever!

Also if you are a fan of my works or have just heard of me check out my new and old stories by me, Dalek_Who!

And Thanks again bro!

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