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5/26/2009 c8 35xX.Chu-Chan.Xx
I'm not really upset, ur story isn't that short, besides this chapter is longer than my chapters in my stories... love the chapters though ^^ now pls continue
5/26/2009 c9 xX.Chu-Chan.Xx
OH I'M SO GLAD U MADE 2 NEW CHAPPIE! PLS UPDATE SOON! POOR POOR CONAN! DX I'M NOT PUTTING YOU TOO MUCH PRESSUURE AM I? I really dont mind how long u update just update new chapters, dont discontinue them...don't let them be the same as how the stories i like got discontinued... DON'T STOP THIS STORY!
5/26/2009 c8 52mangaluva
Will he tell her? Won't he? Will he won't he? Aw, poor guy...
5/25/2009 c8 7Popperlolli
Its soo good 3 Keep writing! Im excited to hear more ^^

The chapter was pretty good, despite its short length. I still enjoyed it.
5/25/2009 c7 35xX.Chu-Chan.Xx
UPDATE SOON! ITZ GETTING INTERESTING! XD
5/25/2009 c7 52mangaluva
What's wrong with Jimmy, I wonder? Just another random illness?

BTW... NO! NOT AGAIN! I have an idea and someone else writes it! How? HOW did you know I was writing a nightmare where Akemi turns into Ran? HOW? Ah, I'll feel like a plagarist if I publish that chapter now... :(

Y'know what else is weird? The voice of Shinichi and Kaito, Kappei Yamaguchi (yep, they even have the same seiyu :P) Is also the voice of InuYahsa, and there's precious little similar between THEM, starting with the part where Shinichi and Kaito are both human and born AFTER the thirteenth century... :P
5/19/2009 c6 35xX.Chu-Chan.Xx
THIS IS SOO AWESOME! *starts banging the computer in excitement* poor Conan! I feel so sad for him calling him the death magnet... tsk tsk... anyway what happened to him? Where is he? Pls update soon! X3 and i'm totally ur fan
5/18/2009 c6 ILikeCoupons
O. Hurry up and get on with it.

:( I can't wait longer~
5/16/2009 c5 52mangaluva
Did Heiji just tranq Shinichi with his own watch? XD aww, but poor Shinichi... Akemi's death is something I don't think he can ever forget. I wonder if he'd ever seen someone dying like that before, rather than some time after their death. That scene, in both its manga and anime incarnations, still brings a tear to my eye. :(
5/15/2009 c4 mangaluva
you have a fan! you have me! *waves madly* Not much angst, though, but Heiji's so funny, who cares?
5/15/2009 c4 1Kolidescope
Sounds like this could shape up to be a good fanfic! I find it quite amusing how you're using both the English and Japanese names.. I suppose I like the fact that you're a Case Closed fan but at the same time acknowledge all the canon that Detective Conan has covered. Your introduction is very good and gets me interested. I'd love a good fanfic where Conan's murder magnet capabilities are explored! There are a few things that could be improved, though..

The pacing, first of all. You're on chapter four and not enough has happened even to know what the primary conflict is. Now, a part of this is because your chapters are very short, so combining the chapters into larger ones would probably have been a better move.

Another problem that interferes with the pacing is your direct quoting of anime episodes. While this is good sometimes, it seems to be a bit overused, and it's slowing down the story. References to episodes couldn't hurt, but to quote out a whole scene such as the one where Harley confronts Conan about being Kudo is largely unnecessary. Remember - If we're reading your fanfic, we've most likely already seen the anime!

I'd say the length of the chapters itself is also a problem. I'm sure that updating in short spurts is probably a more convenient way of adding to your story, but it makes things a little choppy. Besides, it would seem to me that you'd have better control of your story's pace and continuity if you edit it in larger chunks at a time on Word or Notepad or the like..

Other than that, I'd be glad to read more once you put it out. =3 I'm sorry if you weren't looking for a lengthy critique.. I suppose I got a little carried away. ^_^
5/14/2009 c1 35xX.Chu-Chan.Xx
oh yeah, at my first comment 'col' i meant cool, sorry for the wrong spelling! but pls update soon! u got some talent! dont ever waste it! ^^
5/14/2009 c4 xX.Chu-Chan.Xx
I really really like it! Don't ever let this story die! i really hope u keep updating! ^^ It's so awesome!
5/14/2009 c3 52mangaluva
Aw, so angsty... LOVE IT! :P This is really well-written, even if the chapters are really short. But I know what you mean about scenes rarely stretching out as far as they do in your head. Still, i'll be looking forward to more of this!
5/14/2009 c3 4HetaPastaH3ro
Can you reply to me what episode harley got shot in while trying to keep someone from commiting suicide?
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