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for Degeneration

8/1/2013 c2 Sean
I'm going to assume the boy isn't Mercer but Pariah
9/2/2012 c2 5Eipok
Oh no, an entire round? Whatever will the super-kid do? Faced with the danger of a single bullet! If that soldier only released a single round, then he's already dead by the boy's hands.
10/9/2011 c2 7HTM
This review is for your second chapter.

"What he saw next was a grassy hill, and a top that hill was a barren tree.". There is only one mistake in this sentence, and it isn't totally wrong either. It's 'atop', it's together, not 'a top'. But that's being nit picky.

There's also another mistake. "Taken back by such an odd thing, the boy placed his right hand against the same side of his face.". Again, there is only one error. And spelling wise, there is nothing wrong. It's 'taken aback', not 'taken back'. Just thought I should put that out there.

"He was staring into the depths of a black and silent void; had is eyes actually opened?", can you find the mistake here? It's 'had his eyes actually opened?'. But yet again, it's a common mistake, something not supposed to be taken seriously. Dammit, me, stop being so nit picky!

"Taking a glance around the room, when he was still in a partial daze, even he could notice the many test tubes, beakers, and empty veils that littered every single bench and desk top he could see.", there is yet again another mistake, but this time, it is neither grammatical or spelling. It's 'empty vials', not 'empty veils'. Veils is a piece of cloth, while vials is what you are referring to.

"He opened his eyes to the sound of shattering glass, and turned to see that the entire window was shattered and in in disarray.". You repeated 'in' twice.

And that's all the errors I've found.

So that's the end? Someone shoots the boy and the boy dies? That's it? I see that you haven't 'completed' the story yet, but I do hope for your own sake that this isn't the end. Otherwise I'd consider it kind of dumb...

But anyway, about the story itself, it's kind of cool, but very confusing. I'm guessing that's what you're aiming for? If not, then rewrite. And reread, to make sure there aren't any mistakes like the ones I found.
10/9/2011 c1 HTM
This review is for your first chapter.

The introduction, while making as much sense as Toby Turner on a bad day (not to say that he's bad or anything), is creepy as fuck. Good job! You managed to give me goosebumps! :D I'm looking forward to reviewing the next chapter.
11/26/2010 c2 2Raziel Sotd
Whoa this is awesome. Both F.E.A.R and Prototype have excellent stories and back stories, FEAR more so then Prototype but still good nonetheless. I am intrigued with Alma's relationship with the boy (Mercer I presume) and how exactly they each got there powers and how other characters are going to play into this. What I'm trying to say is please continue this well written wonder. Good day.
6/24/2009 c2 4The Eternal Winter
I like it so far.Its very interesting and Im looking forward to future chapters.
6/18/2009 c2 Dawn Gazer
As said, very interesting, and am very interested to see where it goes. In my opinion it seems a brilliant combination. But a question that nags at me is how will you play out a relation of whatever kind with Alex and Alma, considering Alma is practically out of her mind psycho?
6/6/2009 c2 Rickrolled
that was actually pretty nice, i look forward to more
5/17/2009 c1 4Commisar Shyus Gyus
nice man. you should check out my prototype crossover. still man pretty swet!
5/16/2009 c1 4ErethrenGarav
Alex Mercer... and Alma Wade... hell of a couple. possibilities are limited until Prototype comes out but when it does and we start to understand the bigger story behind it, or at least details about who Alex really is, how he thinks and acts, this story could probably get a whole lot longer, and let me say I'm looking forward to that. if your looking to simply insert Alex into the FEAR storyline, It'd probably take a bit more work to flesh out what will happen, as lots of what happens in the game is centered around a 'tunnel vision' FPS, where you only find out small details about Alma and what was done to her, and what happened, just trying to stay alive. either way, its looking to be a great story. Keep it up.

Regards, Exardas

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