for Down The Rabbit Hole: Love Hina Arc6/23/2010 c9 
10Wonderbee31
Heh, go Ranma, and enjoyed how he was able to twist the tables on Kitsune there, though I'd wager that'll make her more determined than before , so will look forward to who might get Ranma out ahead of the others, as she may be pretty determined about it.
10Wonderbee31Heh, go Ranma, and enjoyed how he was able to twist the tables on Kitsune there, though I'd wager that'll make her more determined than before , so will look forward to who might get Ranma out ahead of the others, as she may be pretty determined about it.
6/23/2010 c10 deitarionSSokolow
Nice chapter... and whether or not there's less humor doesn't really matter to me since it still spends its time doing a good job of pushing the plot forward.
Nice chapter... and whether or not there's less humor doesn't really matter to me since it still spends its time doing a good job of pushing the plot forward.
6/23/2010 c10 8Quathis
A bit more of the interpersonal humor than anything, but still made me laugh at things. Good to see Su and Ranma bonding. Makes sense that with Motoko being a fem-nazi (or whatever she is that makes her automatically assume all males are dangerous perverts) the explosives expert takes to him the best, especially since he probably gets an adrenaline rush every time a bomb, mine, projectile weapon, etc goes off in his general direction.
As for grammar and spell check:
Kitsune stepped into her doorway to lean against the jam. "I told you. You can't take yer eyes off him for a second or he'll up and vanish on you didn't? But you didn't believe me well, there ya go." Missing an I after "didn't" and before the "?"
Kitsune let out a startled "eep" as she whirled around to find Ranma standing not more than two feet behind holding a trowel and a small container of plaster. a her would be good after "behind"
Holding up the trowel before Ranma eyed Kitsune warily, "Now you said something about a crack on your ceiling?" Pretty sure you need another word after the "before" or remove it and put in a comma
"She had me use to so I could reach the crack on her ceiling and I broke it." an it after "use"
Those are the ones I caught. Until next time.
8QuathisA bit more of the interpersonal humor than anything, but still made me laugh at things. Good to see Su and Ranma bonding. Makes sense that with Motoko being a fem-nazi (or whatever she is that makes her automatically assume all males are dangerous perverts) the explosives expert takes to him the best, especially since he probably gets an adrenaline rush every time a bomb, mine, projectile weapon, etc goes off in his general direction.
As for grammar and spell check:
Kitsune stepped into her doorway to lean against the jam. "I told you. You can't take yer eyes off him for a second or he'll up and vanish on you didn't? But you didn't believe me well, there ya go." Missing an I after "didn't" and before the "?"
Kitsune let out a startled "eep" as she whirled around to find Ranma standing not more than two feet behind holding a trowel and a small container of plaster. a her would be good after "behind"
Holding up the trowel before Ranma eyed Kitsune warily, "Now you said something about a crack on your ceiling?" Pretty sure you need another word after the "before" or remove it and put in a comma
"She had me use to so I could reach the crack on her ceiling and I broke it." an it after "use"
Those are the ones I caught. Until next time.
6/22/2010 c10 9Sargon Dorsai
It looks like you're keeping some of the Ranma/Akane interaction between Ranma and Naru. Personally I think Ranma should hand Naru her ass every time she swings at him. If she had ever hit a regular person with her full strength she would kill them, just like Akane would.
An interesting chapter nonetheless though. I like the interactions between Haruka and Ranma. Shows some genuine interest in his wellbeing. And of course, Ranma has to love the training he's getting from Su. =)
Can't wait for more!
9Sargon DorsaiIt looks like you're keeping some of the Ranma/Akane interaction between Ranma and Naru. Personally I think Ranma should hand Naru her ass every time she swings at him. If she had ever hit a regular person with her full strength she would kill them, just like Akane would.
An interesting chapter nonetheless though. I like the interactions between Haruka and Ranma. Shows some genuine interest in his wellbeing. And of course, Ranma has to love the training he's getting from Su. =)
Can't wait for more!
6/22/2010 c10 Lord Edric
I like, and you know I can see how Ranma would enjoy a death trap obstacle course, through I think the girls should try to follow him in the next chapter, and well stand Love hina need apply
I like, and you know I can see how Ranma would enjoy a death trap obstacle course, through I think the girls should try to follow him in the next chapter, and well stand Love hina need apply
6/22/2010 c9 2Dakaath
I liked the ending scene, the whole 'plans go awry' was pure Ranma 1/2 and very entertaining.
2DakaathI liked the ending scene, the whole 'plans go awry' was pure Ranma 1/2 and very entertaining.
6/22/2010 c9 3Hiryo
Muhahaha a very good one and I especially loved how you handled the final scene of Ranma & Kitsune XD . DX loool
Pleae update soon!
3HiryoMuhahaha a very good one and I especially loved how you handled the final scene of Ranma & Kitsune XD . DX loool
Pleae update soon!
6/22/2010 c9 9Sargon Dorsai
Glad to see another chapter out on this story. Always been one of the more entertaining stories. Mwhaa haa haa. Ranma disappeared on the poor Fox. That'll just make her even more interested in him.
9Sargon DorsaiGlad to see another chapter out on this story. Always been one of the more entertaining stories. Mwhaa haa haa. Ranma disappeared on the poor Fox. That'll just make her even more interested in him.
6/21/2010 c9 deitarionSSokolow
What a nice thing to wake up to. I love how Ranma's curse-knowledge and prior experience with behaviour more Love Hina than canonical Love Hina is throwing Kitsune for a loop.
What a nice thing to wake up to. I love how Ranma's curse-knowledge and prior experience with behaviour more Love Hina than canonical Love Hina is throwing Kitsune for a loop.
6/21/2010 c9 7Kamen Rider Wizard
Wow this story has been updated after a while amazing. This was a great chapter and worth waiting for it. I love the very last line of the chapter Mine are firmer loved it. Keep up the great work
7Kamen Rider WizardWow this story has been updated after a while amazing. This was a great chapter and worth waiting for it. I love the very last line of the chapter Mine are firmer loved it. Keep up the great work