for The Right 'Path'12/7/2012 c7 Steffanie Moore
as disturbing as i found the rape scene to be, the aftermath of it and the relationship between these characters has me wanting to read more. if you can find it in yourself to pick this fic back up, i would follow it.
as disturbing as i found the rape scene to be, the aftermath of it and the relationship between these characters has me wanting to read more. if you can find it in yourself to pick this fic back up, i would follow it.
2/12/2011 c7 
15Sevy14
I enjoyed what you wrote, hopefully you haven't abandoned this story and will be able to update soon. Until then, have a great weekend.
Sevy14
15Sevy14I enjoyed what you wrote, hopefully you haven't abandoned this story and will be able to update soon. Until then, have a great weekend.
Sevy14
2/16/2010 c7 12Britt601
Vividly detailed, I'll give you that. You kept Victor a brute throughout that whole story minus the flashbacks. It was well-written also.
12Britt601Vividly detailed, I'll give you that. You kept Victor a brute throughout that whole story minus the flashbacks. It was well-written also.
2/5/2010 c7 7Sera22
Here is my review for you. Be warned, constructive criticism ahaid.
I like your story very much. I came across it a few weeks ago but never found the time to read through it.
Now that I have done it, I feel myself bound to review! ^^
It is one of the best Victor stories here at ff, your writing capabilities are outstanding, your vivid descriptions ever so often leave me astonished about Victor's animalistic cruelity.
I cannot think of a good end of your story, the only end that keeps coming to my mind is her ending their "relationship" by suicide, sadly.
That's the result you arouse with your words. The fear and feelings, Victor's "god complex", your little interludes about his past, all of that let me think that this is a very twisted story and will get even more twisted in future chapters.
First I was a little bit deceived by the title, because I thought "Oh, Victor is choosing another 'path' - his right path - of his future" and read happily on ^^ Well, it turned out to be a big misunderstanding and lets me laugh every time I think about it!
But I also have thoughts about one thing that doesn't seem right for me in your story.
Maybe you want to lead your readers to another end than I think, then you can correct me, but I will tell you about my interpretation of it now.
You describe a very brutal Victor, one I have rarely seen with such intensity around here. he is so very torn between love and pure hate for the people around him. Your earth-shattering rape scene is one of the best I've read - and I'll tell you this oxymoron leaves a bad taste in my mouth.. Anyway, it was so authentic, so real, so Victor. And considering the purpose you wanted to place with your words I am not able to believe that she actually was pretending it. Never ever. This fact leads me to the real criticism of my review.
When the rape scene was over and you let Victor say "I'm sorry" everything was in order. You gave your reader the (maybe false and evil) hope of him consuming the glow and becoming - not a better but - another man. Or even a man. A direction I really adored about your story.
But then the following chapter mentioned the fake and nothing made sense any more, it was simply unbelievable.
Don't get me wrong, really, I love your story and will read every chapter you will come up with, but with respect she could have never been able to pretend that. How I said, maybe I got something wrong, maybe you did not mean it like that, but the chapter about the fake almost destroyed the plot or thread I thought the story had.
So these are my thoughts about the 'path' you have chosen for your story and now enough of it!
Nevertheless I think very high of you as a writer and will devour every glorious chapter you are going to submit because talented writers like you are rare and consequently good Victor stories are rare, too!
Please keep up your good work!
-Sera
7Sera22Here is my review for you. Be warned, constructive criticism ahaid.
I like your story very much. I came across it a few weeks ago but never found the time to read through it.
Now that I have done it, I feel myself bound to review! ^^
It is one of the best Victor stories here at ff, your writing capabilities are outstanding, your vivid descriptions ever so often leave me astonished about Victor's animalistic cruelity.
I cannot think of a good end of your story, the only end that keeps coming to my mind is her ending their "relationship" by suicide, sadly.
That's the result you arouse with your words. The fear and feelings, Victor's "god complex", your little interludes about his past, all of that let me think that this is a very twisted story and will get even more twisted in future chapters.
First I was a little bit deceived by the title, because I thought "Oh, Victor is choosing another 'path' - his right path - of his future" and read happily on ^^ Well, it turned out to be a big misunderstanding and lets me laugh every time I think about it!
But I also have thoughts about one thing that doesn't seem right for me in your story.
Maybe you want to lead your readers to another end than I think, then you can correct me, but I will tell you about my interpretation of it now.
You describe a very brutal Victor, one I have rarely seen with such intensity around here. he is so very torn between love and pure hate for the people around him. Your earth-shattering rape scene is one of the best I've read - and I'll tell you this oxymoron leaves a bad taste in my mouth.. Anyway, it was so authentic, so real, so Victor. And considering the purpose you wanted to place with your words I am not able to believe that she actually was pretending it. Never ever. This fact leads me to the real criticism of my review.
When the rape scene was over and you let Victor say "I'm sorry" everything was in order. You gave your reader the (maybe false and evil) hope of him consuming the glow and becoming - not a better but - another man. Or even a man. A direction I really adored about your story.
But then the following chapter mentioned the fake and nothing made sense any more, it was simply unbelievable.
Don't get me wrong, really, I love your story and will read every chapter you will come up with, but with respect she could have never been able to pretend that. How I said, maybe I got something wrong, maybe you did not mean it like that, but the chapter about the fake almost destroyed the plot or thread I thought the story had.
So these are my thoughts about the 'path' you have chosen for your story and now enough of it!
Nevertheless I think very high of you as a writer and will devour every glorious chapter you are going to submit because talented writers like you are rare and consequently good Victor stories are rare, too!
Please keep up your good work!
-Sera
8/16/2009 c7 2phantasme
YOU worry too much dear. I couldn’t resist saying that...LOL. :D
Even though Fyre & I have helped you with this, it was your finer writing talents and your impressive creativity that have pulled this through that “writer’s block.” :)
While I admit that I did like the alternative version (can I say that?), I thought this piece you rewrote fit in beautifully and was much more in character for Creed that you had it down pat. Maybe it was shorter than you would have liked, but it was still effectively done especially in the second part where you conveyed Creed’s selfish motives for keeping Louisa alive, and not because he actually cares or values her life. Oh, and the bit where he bribed the doctors and had them tamper with the details of her medical report so she’d get sent back home and back into his “capable and lethal” hands was a nice twist!
As always, I look forward to reading more of what I think is one of the most IC Creed fics to grace this X-Men FF board. I should know because I hit that button enough times to re-read these chappies over and over. Awesome job!
2phantasmeYOU worry too much dear. I couldn’t resist saying that...LOL. :D
Even though Fyre & I have helped you with this, it was your finer writing talents and your impressive creativity that have pulled this through that “writer’s block.” :)
While I admit that I did like the alternative version (can I say that?), I thought this piece you rewrote fit in beautifully and was much more in character for Creed that you had it down pat. Maybe it was shorter than you would have liked, but it was still effectively done especially in the second part where you conveyed Creed’s selfish motives for keeping Louisa alive, and not because he actually cares or values her life. Oh, and the bit where he bribed the doctors and had them tamper with the details of her medical report so she’d get sent back home and back into his “capable and lethal” hands was a nice twist!
As always, I look forward to reading more of what I think is one of the most IC Creed fics to grace this X-Men FF board. I should know because I hit that button enough times to re-read these chappies over and over. Awesome job!
8/14/2009 c7 1Lelir
Welcome back and thanks for updating!
I really hope that you will keep on writing this story, because in my opinion it's getting better and better.
This chapter was very good: moving and chilling at the same time.
Don't worry about darn writer's block and write whatever you want, whenever you feel like it.
1LelirWelcome back and thanks for updating!
I really hope that you will keep on writing this story, because in my opinion it's getting better and better.
This chapter was very good: moving and chilling at the same time.
Don't worry about darn writer's block and write whatever you want, whenever you feel like it.
8/13/2009 c7 18Fyrefly
Darling, *I* thought this was wonderful. I think you did a great job keeping Victor in character while showing him in a caretakerish role. I love the line about his "capable and lethal hands" (gives me chills!) and how "he knew their attention to detail, no matter how great, could never be as meticulous as his was."
Quality over quantity-this chapter may not have been as long as you would have liked but it was worth the wait, and never mind about its brevity! It was awesome, and it ended at a perfect point. I hope you feel a little more comfortable writing again, but if not, I'd be happy to help you brainstorm. Just send me a few brief paragraphs of different ideas you're toying with an we can make them work. I am SURE you have tons of wonderful ideas just bubbling up under the surface!
18FyreflyDarling, *I* thought this was wonderful. I think you did a great job keeping Victor in character while showing him in a caretakerish role. I love the line about his "capable and lethal hands" (gives me chills!) and how "he knew their attention to detail, no matter how great, could never be as meticulous as his was."
Quality over quantity-this chapter may not have been as long as you would have liked but it was worth the wait, and never mind about its brevity! It was awesome, and it ended at a perfect point. I hope you feel a little more comfortable writing again, but if not, I'd be happy to help you brainstorm. Just send me a few brief paragraphs of different ideas you're toying with an we can make them work. I am SURE you have tons of wonderful ideas just bubbling up under the surface!
8/13/2009 c7 6psyche b. mused
YAY! For the update, even though it was short.
PLEASE don't abandon this story...your Victor fascinates me and i'm itching to see where you take this.
psyche b
6psyche b. musedYAY! For the update, even though it was short.
PLEASE don't abandon this story...your Victor fascinates me and i'm itching to see where you take this.
psyche b
8/3/2009 c6 Grummblebunny
Well done, really enjoyed the whole story. I thought it was interesting that you wrote it that it was a paraphila with Victor for the whole "rape" scene. It was unexpected that she knew that it was a game and playing along even though he did not "realize" it.
Well done, really enjoyed the whole story. I thought it was interesting that you wrote it that it was a paraphila with Victor for the whole "rape" scene. It was unexpected that she knew that it was a game and playing along even though he did not "realize" it.
8/1/2009 c6 1Lelir
Ok.
Wow!
You left me dumbstruck at th eend of this chapter, when you revealed that Louisa was, after all, in control of that nightmarish situation and that she knew what to do and how to!
Wonderful, I can't wait to read more!
1LelirOk.
Wow!
You left me dumbstruck at th eend of this chapter, when you revealed that Louisa was, after all, in control of that nightmarish situation and that she knew what to do and how to!
Wonderful, I can't wait to read more!
7/31/2009 c6 2phantasme
Again, you have outdone yourself with this wonderful piece. Victor's battle with Amazon before ripping out her heart was just the icing on the cake; I don't know of any other story that's described Victor's fury and his orgasm mingled into one with such impeccable clarity that you have.
You are more talented than you could ever give yourself credit for. This has got to be one of the most in-character Victor Creed stories I've ever read on here. For real. Why you haven't garnered more praise for this masterpiece is just beyond me.
Simply outstanding my friend! :)
2phantasmeAgain, you have outdone yourself with this wonderful piece. Victor's battle with Amazon before ripping out her heart was just the icing on the cake; I don't know of any other story that's described Victor's fury and his orgasm mingled into one with such impeccable clarity that you have.
You are more talented than you could ever give yourself credit for. This has got to be one of the most in-character Victor Creed stories I've ever read on here. For real. Why you haven't garnered more praise for this masterpiece is just beyond me.
Simply outstanding my friend! :)
7/31/2009 c6 18Fyrefly
Haha, I was just wondering where you were and then I got this notification. Yay!
Very well-done, by the way. This is a great chapter-very brutal and in some ways, very subtle. I love the line about"Securing her place beneath him"-it's both literal and symbolic. Wonderful. The flashback is perfect too, and really allows us some insight into Victor's psyche.
You're terrific, as always. :D
18FyreflyHaha, I was just wondering where you were and then I got this notification. Yay!
Very well-done, by the way. This is a great chapter-very brutal and in some ways, very subtle. I love the line about"Securing her place beneath him"-it's both literal and symbolic. Wonderful. The flashback is perfect too, and really allows us some insight into Victor's psyche.
You're terrific, as always. :D
7/31/2009 c6 6psyche b. mused
How can you be uncertain of this? This is a brilliantly sadistic Victor. Not to mention how brave Louisa is, to see that openly sadistic side of him and take it so that he could get what he needed.
Can't wait to read more!
psyche b
6psyche b. musedHow can you be uncertain of this? This is a brilliantly sadistic Victor. Not to mention how brave Louisa is, to see that openly sadistic side of him and take it so that he could get what he needed.
Can't wait to read more!
psyche b