FanFiction.Net
Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Deleted or Missing Scenes

9/18/2020 c1 Slayer
could you upload the next part but this time recounting Kim and Ron's wedding night?
5/28/2019 c1 Derek
Kim saying to Ron next time I want to get pregant ok i will always say yes to marrying you
5/15/2019 c1 Derek
Kim saying to Ron it sabout time on the having sex and on you asking me tonmarry you
8/20/2010 c1 8AmericanaFox
I must say, very tastefully done. Most of the stories like this that I read rush through each moment to the main event, but you managed to take us on the complete journey. And as a result, the one use of profanity came across as not that but as something born out of their passion for each other, something that she would only say while held in his loving embrace.

Again, very nicely done. :)

A.G.
9/6/2009 c1 15Magic713
I like your writing. i felt i could read it and find it believable. Some writings i have seen on fanfiction, make the characters seem so unrealistic for their "first time". And the fact that the story focused much on how much they love eachother rather than the actual sex was great as well. Good job.
9/6/2009 c1 4CajunBear73
Add my entry into the tasteful column there TL.

Very nicely done.

The excitement of the mission just completed, the emotions following and the decisions of the heart gave way to passions reserved for just those two.

And from their waking together comes the proposal to formally unite them, in more ways than one. Never be normal Ron!

A couple of moments of trepidation, of more than the characters, but fine nonetheless... LOL!

Nicely done, TL.

CajunBear73
9/5/2009 c1 2Shrike176
Great chapter. A few moments brought back some ... very happy memories for me. It was very tastefully done and I'm glad you decided to try something new. I would say that, given their relationship it made sense for Kim and Ron to wait a while before having sex.

That said, you're never going to be 100% sure when it comes to love; both the act and the emotion. The main reason for this is that love is never completely rational. At some point, it requires a leap of faith. In this case, it seems the couple did everything they could on the rational side of things before making this leap.

The rewards, well the climax (of the story I mean) makes those obvious. :)

Great chapter, since it's not complete can we expect more?
9/4/2009 c1 13Game Ghost
Very well done. Spelling seems great, good grammar, characters and scenario are very realistic. I like your work. This love scene was tastefully done, hot and heavy but not smutty. I like it. Hope you can come up with some more stories. Tell me if you ever want to co-write one.
9/4/2009 c1 JCS1966
You dud a fine job for your first time. I liked the proposal. Normally some couples do it the other way around, but then Kim and Ron aren't just like some couples. ;)

This entry was really well done without being smutty. I'm looking forward to seeing what you can come up with next!
9/4/2009 c1 Muzzlehatch
Interesting way to make a marriage proposal. I wonder just what percentage are made during afterglow and not after an expensive dinner and presentation of the engagement ring.

If this story is rated "M" on this site, what would it take for it to be relegated to adultfanfictiondotnet?

One thing that has just occurred to me: when most people read a KP fanfic, do they picture the characters in their mind's eye as how they appeared on the show, or as more realistic?
9/4/2009 c1 119Classic Cowboy
very nicely done. Especially liked the proposal at the end, and the mature stuff was handled very tastefully.

good work!
9/4/2009 c1 15screaming phoenix
Very tastefully done Thomas. I believe you were a bit uncomfortable in some areas but you pulled through it beautifully. A most unusual proposal for a most unusual couple. Well done.
9/4/2009 c1 29Boris Yeltsin
Aw, nice stuff.

BTW, do you take requests for stories?
9/4/2009 c1 179King in Yellow
I did have the feeling that you were writing outside of your comfort zone. That wasn't true everywhere, but I did have that sense several times. But I'm not sure there's anything wrong with that. We never grow as writers if we just stay snug and comfortable with what we already do well. We grow by moving outside our comfort zones and trying new things.

KiY
9/3/2009 c1 26Sentinel103
OK Thomas I have to admit your proposal scene beat all of mine out. Man what am I going to have to do next.

I think you did it as tastefully as you could, but there are several readers that won't be able to review this one for a while.

Otherwise in my humble opinion...good job and thanks.

Larry (Sentinel 103)
16 Page 1 2 Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service