for Don't Stand Too Far from the One You Love2/2/2010 c1 
50Martin III
Excellent foray into the realm of developing characters without sex - sorry it took me so long to review it!
I'm not a bit fan of quickies that center around angst, but this comes off reasonably well thanks to your not overdoing the angst. It doesn't hurt that you do honest depictions of the characters, and address the fact that Susa really seems to hold Kushinada in a far higher regard than himself. Because of that, there's a genuine emotional sensitivity to this fic.
In the future, I'd like to see you tackle a more cutesy romance fic, one with more development, rather than just a quick shot of angst. Still, in a way this is your first effort, after all, and in that light it's not bad at all.
By the way, I advise everyone to ignore Alarid's review below. For the reason why, see my review for The Pairing Guy's first fic, "A Moth to a Flame".
50Martin IIIExcellent foray into the realm of developing characters without sex - sorry it took me so long to review it!
I'm not a bit fan of quickies that center around angst, but this comes off reasonably well thanks to your not overdoing the angst. It doesn't hurt that you do honest depictions of the characters, and address the fact that Susa really seems to hold Kushinada in a far higher regard than himself. Because of that, there's a genuine emotional sensitivity to this fic.
In the future, I'd like to see you tackle a more cutesy romance fic, one with more development, rather than just a quick shot of angst. Still, in a way this is your first effort, after all, and in that light it's not bad at all.
By the way, I advise everyone to ignore Alarid's review below. For the reason why, see my review for The Pairing Guy's first fic, "A Moth to a Flame".
11/24/2009 c1 5Alarid
What's Susa's deal? I felt like this story could have explored the motives behind Susa's tomfoolery. As a reader, we have no clue why he's being such a prick. We are simply conditioned by his conduct to think that he's a prick. I felt like he didn't deserve Kushinada's mercy. I felt like he would be better off in a traveling bluegrass musical group.
Oddbodikins.
5AlaridWhat's Susa's deal? I felt like this story could have explored the motives behind Susa's tomfoolery. As a reader, we have no clue why he's being such a prick. We are simply conditioned by his conduct to think that he's a prick. I felt like he didn't deserve Kushinada's mercy. I felt like he would be better off in a traveling bluegrass musical group.
Oddbodikins.
10/31/2009 c1 72Azalee
Aww ! This is adorable, and it's so great to read some Izumoshipping at long last ! ^_^ Your depiction of Kushinada is really great, stubborn and strong yet still fragile and so lovely. And Susa is just so adorkable. The end seems a bit too abrupt though, it would have been nice to have them *actually* say something, particularly Susa since the way he hurt Kushinada is quite deserving of an apology - actions may mean more than words, but as shown in the rest of the words are still very powerful. This was still very, very sweet.
72AzaleeAww ! This is adorable, and it's so great to read some Izumoshipping at long last ! ^_^ Your depiction of Kushinada is really great, stubborn and strong yet still fragile and so lovely. And Susa is just so adorkable. The end seems a bit too abrupt though, it would have been nice to have them *actually* say something, particularly Susa since the way he hurt Kushinada is quite deserving of an apology - actions may mean more than words, but as shown in the rest of the words are still very powerful. This was still very, very sweet.
10/22/2009 c1 5Mr. Martin
Good story man.
I like how you delve into Susa's feeling and thoughts.
It makes the reader really feel for him.
5Mr. MartinGood story man.
I like how you delve into Susa's feeling and thoughts.
It makes the reader really feel for him.
10/20/2009 c1 3The Lion of the West
Interesting. I can't say I was really moved by anything that was told but it's a nice little piece of much needed Izumo-shipping. Bravo!
Here's hoping to some more Izumo-shipping or Izumo related fics.
3The Lion of the WestInteresting. I can't say I was really moved by anything that was told but it's a nice little piece of much needed Izumo-shipping. Bravo!
Here's hoping to some more Izumo-shipping or Izumo related fics.
10/20/2009 c1 2Julius Americanus
Aha! This is the kind of stuff I've been looking for. A beautifully crafted love scene, much better than most of the other stuff on this site. At first glance I see nothing wrong at all. From the very beginning I have the impression that Susa loves Kushinada, and that she is beautiful. You convey their emotions very well. Thank You for such a great read.
~Julius Americanus
2Julius AmericanusAha! This is the kind of stuff I've been looking for. A beautifully crafted love scene, much better than most of the other stuff on this site. At first glance I see nothing wrong at all. From the very beginning I have the impression that Susa loves Kushinada, and that she is beautiful. You convey their emotions very well. Thank You for such a great read.
~Julius Americanus