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for The Hope of the Senju Clan

9/11/2020 c37 17Luciendar
I'm so glad things are shaping up again. Getting through the cannon chapters can be such a grind. I do wish they'd put more prudence on his Mokuton training. It was so sad when his sword broke. He's gonna be miserable talking killer b about that.
9/11/2020 c34 Luciendar
The flights were pretty awesome and things went almost exactly as I thought they would. My only issue is with how long it took four help to arrive, specifically tsunade and the others. Since we're talking about seals, tsunade should've gotten the signal almost immediately. Given that he almost died she would've likely charged after him with no hesitation. That was a long fight too, even before Kushina showed up. It really just didn't fit.
9/10/2020 c33 Luciendar
Well, guess I was wrong about Nawaki. When you said his corpse was unidentifiable I assumed you were foreshadowing. Also, you had the Nibi making references to the scene with Naruto passing out and groping Yugito. That doesn't track with what you said about her not knowing because she was supposed when it happened. If the Nibi could read her memories then she wouldn't have been so relieved about nibi not teasing her later about it.
9/10/2020 c30 Luciendar
That fight was off the fucking chain. I mean, I had a pretty good idea on how it was going to end, but the journey getting there was freaking stellar. I admit to being a harsh citric, but I love giving credit where it's due. The Samui vs Haku fight was rough for me since I like both characters, being slightly more partial to Samui, but it was all finesse until the very end. This one used the same finesse but took the power to a whole other level.

And as far as the spelling issues, who cares. I mean, every time you've made a mistake I've known what you meant. That's all that really matters. Also, the mistakes weren't all that numerous so no sweat.

Lastly, I've got money on Nawaki being one of the bigger villains.
9/9/2020 c26 Luciendar
While I'll admit that Naruto's personal taijutsu is not nearly as refined as one line the gentle fist, he's still formidable I never looked at Nejis scores but there is no way he has Naruto's speed. That said, skill aside, neji shouldn't have been able to fend off all those clones so well.
9/9/2020 c25 Luciendar
I'm only confused why you ranked Naruto's genjutsu so low. After catching Orochimaru in some for a bit you'd think greed m he'd earne at the very least.
9/9/2020 c22 Luciendar
I'm sorry but does Naruto have to be disarmed in every freaking fight he draws his sword in? He's starting to look like the worst swordsman ever. Also, he would've absolutely trounced her with his chakra. It's ridiculous that you had jiraiya or whoever thinking l thinking otherwise. The thing that really sucked about that fight was that Naruto couldn't dodge shit time and time again. Even without his seals off that wad ridiculous.
9/9/2020 c20 Luciendar
I just don't buy it. The first hokage's unique sage mode is due to the connection he gets to nature chakra from his mokuton. The nature chakra is the cursed seal's crux. It's how they get the power up. It should've malfunctioned somehow when applied to Naruto.
9/9/2020 c19 Luciendar
I just don't know how believable that fight is. Orochimaru is a clever fighter, but simply not as powerful as you made him out to be in my opinion. No offence intended. He's a skill fighter. I also think the mokuton should negate the seal by its very nature. That said, naruto should've used a better surprise tactic with his mokuton. I mean, he literally had orochimaru standing there and watching him. Not smart and far too straightforward. Honestly I think you've made Naruto too powerful and that him losing doesn't make sense most if the times. I honestly think he should've been able to hold off orochimaru long enough to make him retreat.
9/9/2020 c18 Luciendar
Your math is wrong here. You said there were 80 genin left. You then had anko say there were only twenty six teams left. 26372 even with considering that two of those teams have 4 members that would only come to 74. So, there are 26 three-man teams and 2 additional four-man teams to equal 80.
9/9/2020 c16 Luciendar
The harem seems obvious at this point, but I really hope it's not as big as it looks. I have to say that de-aging all the girls as you have is a bit much. I just hope you didn't give samui to Sasuke. She's cool and aloof, he's an asshole.
9/8/2020 c12 Luciendar
Well, I can admit when I'm wrong and clearly this is one of those times. You put quite the spin in things. I do hope to see more of Kushina. I will say this though, orochimaru simply assuming Naruto would be in the Chunin exams seemed off.
9/8/2020 c11 Luciendar
I know it's easy to use the canon team seven, but in my opinion using it in this story was complete crap. No leader would put two such high priority targets in the same group. It would be asking for trouble. Now, yes, technically canon Naruto is a high priority target, but that was hidden and people thought nothing of him. Everyone now knows your Naruto is the Senju heir and that killing him would end that family line, kill him or kidnap him.
9/8/2020 c10 Luciendar
Why did kushina come to Konoha if not took become the kyubi jinchuriki?
9/8/2020 c9 Luciendar
The sexy jutsu doesn't really fit this Naruto at all, him being anti pervert and all. I'd have given him some sort of demon mask jutsu. Also, when bringing up Shion and demon country it would have been interesting for Naruto to learn about about get mother's death.
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