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for New version of Twilight, Bella is a mythical being

12/19/2009 c5 linkin4life
12/14/2009 c5 Shellac

I saw that you liked my story, so I thought I'd pop in and see what you're working on. This is a very lively story, lots of action and things happening. This is a good, ambitious first fanfic and I think you probably have a fair amount of talent as a writer. You can tell that you're writing it very quickly and that you're enthusiastic about it which is great. You still retain good variation, but your spelling and grammar check suffers a bit from the speed. I personally hate reading through things that I've just written (in case they don't sound as good the second time around!) but I make myself do it, reading everything maybe two or three times. I will find new mistakes every time I read my things through. If you can make yourself do that, I think your story will benefit greatly.

Keep up the good work and don't be afraid to write several stories at once. Read and write as much as possible and you will keep getting better at it.

X Shellac
12/13/2009 c5 4PrincessLonesome
Nice chapter.

I'm looking forward to the next one.
12/11/2009 c4 cb
awesome! PLease post more soon...
12/10/2009 c4 PrincessLonesome
good chapter; it's really getting better each time!
12/10/2009 c3 4lovetheL
hey! so, definitely LOVE the concept! the story is turning out really well too. it moves kinda fast, but it also works, so keep it up. definitely needs to be edited a bit better, but it seems like the editing gets better every chapter. i was the same with my first few fanfics, so no big. all in all, its great! continue writing!


12/9/2009 c3 4PrincessLonesome
Nice. I like the plot and I'm very curious to see where this goes.
12/4/2009 c2 12thunderful
Intriguing storyline- i'm interested in seeing where this goes
12/4/2009 c2 2J.M. Rose
thank you so much for updateing! you have an awesome story!
12/4/2009 c2 Reader
WOW! So cool!
12/3/2009 c1 sprazinko
That was really good
12/2/2009 c1 J.M. Rose
this is an awesome story please update soon!
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