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for Dark Empire Lost Galaxy

10/25/2017 c1 Blake2020
good
12/22/2014 c1 khalid
why is this book so short.
6/30/2014 c1 heretohelpyou18
This had a lot of work to be done. I suggest that you try to extend the motion of events, slow down and add more details to what is happening. Develop a different method of how the characters are talking, what you are doing now is fine but put more dialouge in the story too, also separate the characters speaking from the rest of the paragraph it will make thinking easier for the reader making them happy when they read and will want to read more. Overall, take time and pay careful attention to what you are writing so you know the story is consistent. Great story, keep up the goods work, love the idea of Vader getting redemption and Leia learning the ways of the Force and also the idea of two super forces joining together.
2/5/2011 c2 19Kamen Rider Raika
I've got to say the concept of the story is interesting, but you need to work on the format of the writing. Everything is bunched up together and it makes it look like a mess. I don't mean any offense, but I think I'm not the only one who would say that. Still, it's a good story.

Raika out!
10/1/2010 c1 kihakukage
interstng

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