for Rough Love8/11/2010 c1 Pantaloons1
I don't even want to ask if you've ever read a damn BOOK before, because I'm scared of your answer either way... This SUCKED. PERIOD. You're a terrible writer. It shouldn't even be a hobby for you on the internet, because then others have to suffer from your despicable choice in words and sentence structure. STOP WRITING UNTIL YOU LEARN HOW TO DO IT RIGHT.
I don't even want to ask if you've ever read a damn BOOK before, because I'm scared of your answer either way... This SUCKED. PERIOD. You're a terrible writer. It shouldn't even be a hobby for you on the internet, because then others have to suffer from your despicable choice in words and sentence structure. STOP WRITING UNTIL YOU LEARN HOW TO DO IT RIGHT.
8/5/2010 c1 Sienna
This story was shit it wasn't even that explict. You make the characters ooc for your own benefit, that's a big no no on ff.
This story was shit it wasn't even that explict. You make the characters ooc for your own benefit, that's a big no no on ff.
8/5/2010 c1 
1FrostedSunshine
Good job on the intro
Hime seemed so sad
But grimmjow swooped in to save the day (^-^)
I loved the lemon it was a lot better than the first few u did before
I agree with ur other reveiwer that it was very sight descriptive tho u could
Add in the other senses as well
Lol the two guys t tthe end was totally beyond rndom
Nd ur AN at the end ws sooo funny
1FrostedSunshineGood job on the intro
Hime seemed so sad
But grimmjow swooped in to save the day (^-^)
I loved the lemon it was a lot better than the first few u did before
I agree with ur other reveiwer that it was very sight descriptive tho u could
Add in the other senses as well
Lol the two guys t tthe end was totally beyond rndom
Nd ur AN at the end ws sooo funny
8/5/2010 c1 MadnessMaddox
Not bad. Although my suggestion is to include more than just the sense of sight. Taste, texture, scent, and hearing are all important elements of sex, and you're a little lacking. *chuckles*
Plus sex rarely goes that smoothly. Least in my experience.
Not bad. Although my suggestion is to include more than just the sense of sight. Taste, texture, scent, and hearing are all important elements of sex, and you're a little lacking. *chuckles*
Plus sex rarely goes that smoothly. Least in my experience.