for The Fourth Marauder3/21/2017 c1 Guest
The Gaunt line was so inbred it effectively died back in the thirties. You think Morfin Gaunt was actually capable of producing viable sperm, much less a child who wasn’t terribly deformed? Merope got lucky, but when you breed a bloodline within itself ten times over, you get problems. Lots and lots of problems.
The Gaunt line was so inbred it effectively died back in the thirties. You think Morfin Gaunt was actually capable of producing viable sperm, much less a child who wasn’t terribly deformed? Merope got lucky, but when you breed a bloodline within itself ten times over, you get problems. Lots and lots of problems.
12/3/2011 c1 Blobby
I'm sorry, but this Amethyst Gaunt character is a complete Mary Sue. This story could've been so clever and funny (especially with a female Marauder) if you'd actually humanized your OC with memorable, quirky traits. The whole 'double animagi' and 'purple eyes' thing is, in a nutshell, kind of silly. To improve, try and make a character with genuine flaws and depth; for example, why does she dislike pureblood idealism? What memorable qualities define Amethyst as a thestral, or a wolf? Put a little planning into your story, and you could be on to something amusing, but also inspirational to feminist acts and all that jazz.
Apart from that, I reckon you're doing pretty good so far. I love your writing technique, and the prank was hilarious and pulled off excellently. Keep practicing, and you'll be a brilliant writer soon. :)
I'm sorry, but this Amethyst Gaunt character is a complete Mary Sue. This story could've been so clever and funny (especially with a female Marauder) if you'd actually humanized your OC with memorable, quirky traits. The whole 'double animagi' and 'purple eyes' thing is, in a nutshell, kind of silly. To improve, try and make a character with genuine flaws and depth; for example, why does she dislike pureblood idealism? What memorable qualities define Amethyst as a thestral, or a wolf? Put a little planning into your story, and you could be on to something amusing, but also inspirational to feminist acts and all that jazz.
Apart from that, I reckon you're doing pretty good so far. I love your writing technique, and the prank was hilarious and pulled off excellently. Keep practicing, and you'll be a brilliant writer soon. :)
1010/26/2010 c1 sara253xxx
great story! really unique and funny! please update soon! this story is really smart!
great story! really unique and funny! please update soon! this story is really smart!