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for Patriot's Dawn

5/26 c9 1yeaaaahhhh I read
This little known fact of Knonohamru's parents both bring anbu gaurds really does shine thru in older fanfics.
don't get me wrong entirely possible for him to have died on a misson, too.
but considering their job as his personal defense detail i doubt jt
5/26 c8 yeaaaahhhh I read
I swear on the Timbs i own if this Great Naruto bridge in this timeline isn't named the Great Asuma Bridge

Imma break into ya house and oil you up as a punishment!
5/15 c25 3AlexOrange
It's pretty inspiring to see a fanfic that has been receiving updates for 9 years.
5/11 c4 Guest
The goal of this MC is to be S-rank cuz he knows Akatsuki is after him. But I just don't see the potential of him getting there. He has nothing special. No Kage Bunshin. No Kekkei Genkai. No Jutsu. Nothing.

It is quite infuriating, tbh. Because I just know the author will pull some asinine plot forcing to get what he wants.
5/11 c3 Guest
I dunno. Naruto without Shadow Clones is not really Naruto. At this rate, you could slap any OC name on him and it wouldn't really matter.
5/6 c22 morganjp
I've ever left a bad reveiw before this one, and i really dont wanna be negative, but this character of naruto is so strong willed, determined, and smart, yet such a dumbass when it acually matters. He gets captured and is pretty much forced to do his assigned mission, I can understand freaking out, but he just got stupid/denial at the same time, and it took him so long to finally realize that he doesnt have a choice but to train. like seriously man, that was fucking implied as soon as you figured out were you were. I get adding suspense and character thought, but you're putting so much in and in a way that makes him look like an idiotic moron with no common sense. im sorry if this is harsh, but it's like he's held back by NEVER thinking or paying attention in fights. also, if garra was unconscious, then he should have been able to spot it, being a SHINOBI and all, and imiedietly moved to correct that. although that may have been cause no one told him about the biuju mind eating thing, but he should have been told if he was fighting em. sorry, I hate to leave a negative review as most of the other stuff in this story is good, I just dont like this Naruto so much. anyway, good work even if i dont sould like i think it is, its pretty good and i hope you continue and improve in he future as i think your a good writer, you just made a bad charatcer in MY opinion, so dont let this affect you in anyway. I'd hate to see you quit
5/5 c25 TheEleventhDoctorDab
Pretty sure she kicked the crap out of him, too. Broken bones and all.
5/5 c26 TheEleventhDoctorDab
...Well. This is certainly one of the best Naruto fanfictions I've ever read, and I've read a downright unhealthy amount of Naruto fics. Although I still don't remember which fic it was that had Naruto and Sakura fighting on even footing when he planned to defect to Orichimaru, so if anyone finds out, please tell me.
4/21 c14 Guest
"Mission history is classified B-rank info for anyone in Konoha"

Your attempt to make Naruto look smarter is actually making you look rather stupid:
First, how many missions of which rank someone did is hardly the same as the actual mission history.
Second, villages like to show off their genin in these exams, like an international dick-measuring contest. Letting other nations officially know the number of missions of whatever rank that a genin has taken would make perfect sense.
Third, Kabuto is a very successful spy who has been trained by and worked for Danzo, Sasori and Orochimaru, all without Konoha ever getting suspicious. And then you go and have him blow his cover by basically publically announcing that he has access to highly classified information? And for what reason? To have something to talk about with the rookies? Seriously, either Kabuto is pathetically stupid here or you are. Or maybe you realize all that and still try to make Naruto look smart this way, because you believe you can get away with feeding this crap to your readers? And, again, Kabuto has been a rather successful spy so far. That doesn't leave many possibilities.

Never try to have your characters be smarter than you are.
4/10 c3 Zaytunger
fuck this is annoying. feminazis on the charge and our mc became simp to their schemes. f you woke cunt. him being an antagonist towards the village would be a more enticing story than this trash.
3/31 c2 Ravendle
yk i love that analogy ramen is a better way to say seal and kunai
3/26 c1 WoodenDraconis
Well, when you think about it, in canon Naruto was probably the stealthiest of his team. Everyone just thought that he was a stupid loudmouth that didn't know the definition of stealth. You gotta remember though, he painted the Hokage monument in full view of everyone and no one noticed. While wearing bright orange. He also stole the Forbidden Scroll of Seals from the Hokage office. WHILE WEARING BRIGHT ORANGE!
3/24 c6 papitue
You make too much out of character, yeah i understand that being said when your kid that some people are gonna kill you and all, but that much to just be antipathie as fuck is really weir for Naruto.
2/25 c1 Guest
Ah. Dobe and teme.

Teme is not a noun. It is a form of second person address.

Furthermore, Sasuke only called Naruto "dobe" one time in all of Naruto. Before his defection, he called Naruto "usuratonkachi" a lot, but for some reason, nobody uses that.

Dropped.
2/19 c18 PaleFeed
The worst part of this story is that you keep killing people off in ways that dont really advance the plot and are only written for a shock factor
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