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for A Christmas Carol

12/7/2012 c2 1catdreamer39
I know it's been two years already, but is there any chance that you would continue and finish this? :D Pretty please?
11/8/2011 c2 26ghettos
Thank you for saving my eyes.

Though I did spot one mistake - "We made a deal." Natalie's lips curved up into a sinister smile. "Not many of the nannies that I have hired to much better then you two. I was expecting this place to be much more chaotic."

Isn't it meant to be "...nannies that I have hired DO much better THAN you two?" Because, y'know, of the difference between 'than' and 'then'? I'm not so sure about the 'do' bit, though :/

Ah, well, great job, and I'm waiting for the update. (:

Forever yours,

Drew
5/24/2011 c2 pennilee
I saw one punctuation mistake. Other than that, this is very interesting and I want to know more. Update?
2/17/2011 c2 DrippingRubies
i know it isent christmas enymore but please continue this story
1/16/2011 c2 26Syberian Quest
Tired of me yet?

Sorry, but I'm just in a reviewing mood. I decided to finally go through all the stories that I read ages ago and review them. This happens to be one of them. Another one of the stories that convinced me to stick around fanfiction.

I really enjoy the idea behind this. The characters are very IC, even though Dan seems a little dim at times. Hamilton lacks a bit of depth, but I know others have already mentioned this. I won't be their echo, so I don't have much to say.

Natalie is married? Hmm... Intersting. Maybe we could see more of her family? Her son was hilarious, I have to say. I would've thought, though, that a Kabra would force their children to be a bit more civilized. Oh, well. Maybe Natalie was tired of her mother's forceful ways and decided to be less strict.

Overall, great story! I hope that you continue this story, although I do have the feeling that you're still trying to come up with a plan that would trick Ian. Not much would.

Anyway,keep writing!

~BB99~
12/27/2010 c2 5li'miss sunshine
I love this story! XD

LOL! Fred sound pretty evil... XD

Post soon! XD
12/27/2010 c2 1theLastOlympian
I love how creative you are with this story!

Good job, I am eagerly waiting for the next chapter!
12/26/2010 c2 Sophia
I love this! Dan is so in character. Hamilton as sweet as ever and I like how Natalie feels essentially herself but also obviously much more mature and just plain nicer.

I'm very curious to see where you go with the plan. Update soon PLEASE!
12/26/2010 c2 16Spring Sunrise
I, for one, am glad that you are doing this. The last Christmas Carol story was nice, but, as you admitted, it was basically the original novel with the names of the 39 Clues characters inserted. This version is much better, so far. It suits the 39 Clues characters better, if that makes any sense. There is still something to be imporved, though:

"We made a deal." Natalie's lips curved up into a sinister smile. "Not many of the nannies that I have hired to much better then you two. I was expecting this place to be much more chaotic."

Did you mean: "Not many of the nannies that I have hired DID TOO much better then you two..." instead?

Other than that, there only seems to be one problem. This chapter left me feeling doubtful that you know how you are going to continue your story. Do you know yet how Dan, Hamilton, and Natalie are going to fool Ian? If you do, my apologies for doubting you. I've just seen too many promising mulit-chap fics that end up on hiatus indefinitely because the author didn't know how to finish.
12/26/2010 c2 34SmurfsTasteGoodOnToast
LoL! Fred's funny!
12/26/2010 c2 Lieutenant Evergreen
I love this story! And I have an idea on how to finish it before Christmas next year. (assuming you'll write one that is...) Start writing in, like, June! Finish it, then start posting the chapters around Christmas time! Then you'll know how long the story will be, so you can plan on when to start posting, and how many times a week you should post! Amazing what pre-writing can do! Just an idea though, of course. And like I said earlier, LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE IT!

Signed, Lieutenant Evergreen
12/25/2010 c2 13Kaye Nightshade
Are you gonna include Amy in the past and the present or possibly also the future?

In the future Amy's wearing a wedding gown and... Oh no, I'm babbling again.

Well, love the story still. Natalie and Reagan are married? Okay...

Please update soon!

Ciao.

~KL
12/25/2010 c2 10screamattheskyx3
Haha, I love the idea of Natalie's devil child. :) That whole scene was great, in my opinion.

I pretty much agree with what Joyce has been telling you. Your spelling, grammar, and imagery are impeccable. Ian is so wonderfully in-character; how do you do it, Muse?

But Hamilton is a little...eh (for me). Then again, it's hard for anyone to write him correctly.

Can't wait to see Natalie's plan. :D

-Sky
12/25/2010 c1 3Lee Gal Heap Lawned
Good grammar and spelling, characters seem un-OOC (would that be in character?), and overall it is original. Well, it is to an extent, but you get what I mean, right?

Can't wait for more!
12/25/2010 c1 12Cascading Rainbows
Haha, I am SO late with this review.

Pros:

Spelling/Grammar. Duh. That's a pretty obvious one that crops up in your stories.

Description. The first paragraph is amazingly detailed, just like the real A Christmas Carol. Your descriptions really set the mood for the unfolding story.

Characterization. Ian and Dan are very in-character, and Hamilton, well, I've already given you my opinion of him. But, luckily, he's not as bad as other Hamiltons I've read about. *shiver* XD So, characterization is pretty good overall.

Length. I have no idea why, but I like long, descriptive chapters, like this one.

Cons:

Hamilton. Eh, you already know why. He's improved in the second chapter, and I'm hoping that you'll understand Hamilton better than Reagan and Madison themselves after writing this story. XD But Hamilton's a hard character, and I applaud you for putting effort into him, while others just scribble out his sentences, making him a mindless drone while etching carefully sculpted dialogue for Ian and Amy.

Concluding sentence. It's good, of course, but I felt like it wasn't powerful enough. However, this really doesn't matter, because this isn't a oneshot, where the beginning and ending sentences are very important. So, just dismiss this con, if you will.

Overall

9.7/10. This is...amazing, and I love the difference from the old and new versions.

Keep writing,

Cascading Rainbows (aka Your Beta, Who Hangs Her Head in Shame in the Presence Of Your Writing Glory XD)
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